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Original poster

advice needed for brats limo party please.

25 replies

williamsmummy · 19/05/2006 14:09

My BIL has organised a brats limo party for his 9yr old daughter.
Its a just girls party, and my 7yr old has been invited. ( but not my other 3 sons , who would love a ride in a limo!)

However I am not comfortable with it, the limo drives them around and the 12 girls from 6-10 sit and have their nails painted and a full face of make up. Then they do a bit of singing/music and then go to pizza express for a meal all dolled up.

I have never let my daughter wear make up ( or brats type clothes for that matter) and am not comfortable with her going in to a public place with a full face of grown up make up.
I worry about her using public toilets on her own , ( in the resturant) or simply odd people learing at my daughter.( who is very tall for her age and looks older than 7)

I also hate the idea that it is normal for young little girls to wear clothes like the brats stuff and the make up, as i am keen to let my daughter enjoy the age she is.

I have toyed with the idea of

a) letting my daughter go , with instructions that she does not wear the make up ( she does have ezcema BTW) . but that may make her feel left out.

B) refusing to let her go at all to her cousins party.

c) well, do i upset my BIL by telling him that I dont find this acceptable for little children? I dont want to do this, family relations would become VERY rocky if I did that.

So, what would you do? please help.

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Blu · 19/05/2006 14:13

Invent a very important prior engagement, I think!

Sounds AWFUL!

Are they supervised by the girls mother, or left alone with the Limo driver?

Are you related to Cod - wasn't her neighbour having a party like this? Sounds truly the pits.

Blu · 19/05/2006 14:14

Tell your BIL it sounds great for 9 year-olds but your 7 year-old is too young? And has excema, and gets car sick in Limos?

tamum · 19/05/2006 14:15

I think my dd might have a strategic illness on the day. She has been to a make-over party (yeuch) but it was in someone's house. I would not have been willing for her to go out in public dressed and made up like that. Poor you :(

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PinkKerPlink · 19/05/2006 14:15

tbh even though it sounds tackier than primark knickers, i would let her go and say nothing. If you stop her from going or you say 'no' to the make-up she will feel left out. i guarentee it

nutcracker · 19/05/2006 14:15

The only bit i wouldn't like is that going to pizza hut or whereever in make-up. If they were going home for the pizza or having pizza first then the rest would be fine with me.

Auntymandy · 19/05/2006 14:16

I dont think I would plan a party like that for my DD and she is 13 but I would proberbly let her go. At 7 your SIL would make sure she was safe out in public.

Gillian76 · 19/05/2006 14:17

AM I the only one who worries about the lack of seat belts in limos? Surely it can't be legal?

nutcracker · 19/05/2006 14:17

Have to say my Dd1 (8) would love a party like that.

Auntymandy · 19/05/2006 14:18

whats wrong with primark knickers?!!!!

NomDePlume · 19/05/2006 14:18

I agree with nutty - the make up/dress up thing is fine for a one off party type thing, but wearing it in a restaurant seems inappropriate. I'd be happy enough if it was a girly night-in themed sleepover party

Next · 19/05/2006 14:22

Sounds more like a party for 13/14 year olds!! What an awkward situation.

Could you request that your dd has minimum make up applied i.e bit of lip gloss and clear mascara and is escorted to the loo? Perhaps you could even meet up with them at the pizza place?

(Love primark knickers btw )

thewomanwhothoughtshewasahat · 19/05/2006 14:22

I'd invent a reason not to go. It sounds revolting. Go out for the day with friends to something that your family will all enjoy. I wouldn;t do b coz it's unfair to expect her to implement a rule like that when she's so little and there's probably no point in c.

Auntymandy · 19/05/2006 14:22

dont you think the other people in the pizza place will realise its a party and not a group of under age prostitutes?

PinkKerPlink · 19/05/2006 14:23

no auntymandy, i have a few pairs from there myself

Auntymandy · 19/05/2006 14:27

me too, those with little diamonte dogs are so confy and only £! a pair!!!

PinkKerPlink · 19/05/2006 14:28

I have got some nice hipster ones with thickish elastic and animals appliqued on the front:o I must admit I feel about 15 when i wear them

Auntymandy · 19/05/2006 14:35

mine are low at the back so they dont show over my jeans but come up a bit over my fat belly
probably not meant to look like that..my strange shape!!

ggglimpopo · 19/05/2006 14:36

It does sound grim. I think either she goes and has exactly the same as the rest (makeup etc) or she shouldn't go at all, for which, as it is family, you will need to find a damn good reason which won't offend......

Auntymandy · 19/05/2006 14:39

could you go too?

zippitippitoes · 19/05/2006 14:40

won't it be like a dressing up party though..i'm sure Pizza hut customers won't be taking much notice

girrafey · 19/05/2006 15:15

ok, i would have said the obvious way to decline was that your ds's cant go as girls only and that isnt fair, so why dont you offer to take your dd, ds's and your neice to a film or something another time instead. or some sort of other treat that all your children could join in with. film and pizza and sleep over at yours or something? hth

Original poster

williamsmummy · 19/05/2006 15:55

like the film idea, as for the sleepovers thats the norm for most weekends for these girls.
we have them over for sleepovers quite a few times a year.

I suspect that I dont have a choice, and I cant win. So daughter will go, and I will grit my teeth the whole time she is away.

as for the chav comments, well they certainly fit this idea! what on earth will these girls get for their 16th 18th or 21st birthdays?!!!!

OP posts:

fairyjay · 19/05/2006 16:09

To be honest Williamsmummy, your BIL might have found himself in the situation I am in, where you sort of have to invite someone because it's your niece and you always have etc., and might think that you would be offended if she were excluded.

I would be inclined to say 'thank you so much lovely BIL for thinking of xxxx, but I think that niece and her friends will have a great time, and won't really want there style cramped by a 7 year old.....so perhaps we could do the cinema as a treat for the cousins'.

kitbit · 20/05/2006 09:42

Could you go with them or meet at the pizza place? She might feel left out if she doesn't get to go, but you do want to keep an eye on her, go to the loo with her etc. Sounds grim to me! Unless she doesn't know about it in which case you could use one of the very good suggestions to get out of it. I'd go for the car-sick and eczema excuse personally!

fattiemumma · 20/05/2006 20:47

Is your DD the only girl of that age going. if so could you not say to your BIL that you feel she may feel a bit left out as it will probably her cousins school freinds and as she is younger she may feel a bit left out.

as others have said it may be that she was invited out of courtesy as she is family.

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