DD just thrown dinner across room !

[Esmummy]

DD (22 months old) has just picked up handfulls of her pasta and thrown it across the front room. I asked her to pick it up god knows how many times to no avail, so then i tried the good girl route "be a good girl and pick it up for mummy", just to get feet stamped and "no". Then i tried the naughty girl route "you are a naughty girl .... if you don't pick up that pasta".
She picked up half of it when i turned the TV off and told her it wasn't going back on until she had picked it all up but then she sat on the floor and wouldn't budge.
In the end i sat her on the sofa (i picked up the other half of the pasta and told her she had made mummy upset and she wouldn't have Story Makers on. She screamed for a few minutes then came over and said sorry mummy and gave me a kiss and cuddle.
This is the first time she has ever done this and to be honest I'm a bit shocked, I wasn't expecting her to just blatantly stand there and tell me no whilst stomping her feet. How can i make her do something if she refuses ?

x posts can i just say quickly that beware of the naughty step, i used it early on for actually quite mild misbehaviour (which personally i would consider throwing food to be) so it felt less effective later on for eg when she maliciously hit me in the face, or for scratching the walls etc. Don't know if everyone would agree with me. Actually now I don't use the naughty (mat here) at all because it got to the point where she just kept running off it so i use Time Out but only for absolutely defiant bad behaviour - otherwise i don't know how i would really convey that hitting for eg is just NOT ON!!

Thanks everyone for your opinions/advise.
I will try and take them all on board, take it this is where things start getting interesting !

Esmummy i had a generally compliant good little girl for quite a while after 2 yo, my friend who is a nanny was relieved when she started challenging me, said "thank god she's normal!" :)

Maybe not using using the word no would help. We found at nursery that since we have stopped using the word no then the children just stand and shout no as much. Also my DD is 13 months and when she throws her food then i warn her that if she does it again then it will be taken away and it took a few attempts but she now knows that it will actually be taken away. This caused major strops but she is getting the idea now!

Esmummy, I'm sure the helpful ideas on here will sort things, and just remember this when you're feeling frazzled - a member of my family smacked their DS, TWICE, on the hand, for throwing one piece of food on the floor when he was about 18 months old...then told everyone in the room to ignore the child, she left the room and the child proceeded to get hysterical for about five minutes until she came back in

whatever you're doing, it's better than this!!!!!!

Hope you get it all sorted!