DH's parents live about four hours from us and consequently we don't see them much. We stayed with his family briefly at Christmas, though in total DS has seen his grandparents a handful of times and will certainly have very little, if any, memory of them. We've been quite critical of them in the past for not making enough effort to visit (both are retired and have no ties, whereas we both work FT, have DS and two DSDs to factor into arrangements). I get on well with DH's parents on the whole, though they are very different to my own. His mum was notoriously strict when DH and his sisters were growing up and is not exactly the most maternal woman i have ever met. Her home is pristine and she likes it that way, nothing is ever out of place and she comes out in a cold sweat if the smallest mark is left on her worktops or floor. We have to remove our shoes when we enter her house - fair enough you might say, but i give this information to illustrate the point. Anyway, the main thing is that DS just does not know them or have a relationship with them and it has worried my DH since DS was born.
So last night DH was talking to his parents. They say they want to visit us soon and of course they are welcome to. It's great that they are putting in some effort and it will be good for both DH and DS to see them. However, they have also suggested that they have DS for a 'long weekend' to give DH and i 'a break'. It's a nice, kind thought and DH is over the moon that they seem to have taken on board some of the things we've said to them in the past.
The thing is, i don't even leave DS with my own family for long weekends and he knows and loves them all dearly and sees them often as they all live within 30 minutes of us. The longest i've left him is from Saturday morning until Sunday evening with my sister. The reason for this is that as we work FT our time with him is precious and neither of us has had much desire to offload him while we go off without him for long periods. I'm happy to take the odd evening off and go out for a nice meal with DH or whatever, but when we go anywhere for longer we want to share the experience with him.
Anyway, DH is keen to take them up on the offer because he sees it as a big step. I understand that. They're his grandparents and i never want to stop them seeing him. But he doesn't know them! DOn't get me wrong, he's a happy, sociable and outgoing little boy who will warm to them quickly i'm sure, but their rules are so different from ours and my family's where young children are concerned.
Am i being silly? Can anyone suggest a compromise that won't hurt their feelings?