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Reverse cycling

10 replies

Purplecatti · 05/03/2013 10:12

Has anyone overcome this? My 4 month old baby won't really feed during the day but wants to eat every hour and a half at night. She doesn't nap well either.
I googled and I'm sure she's doing reverse cycling, although I can find very little help. My health visitor just clucked and said that sounded difficult and wanted to weigh her and I can't find any help on the internet. All the pages were about mums who work, I don't. I'm with my baby all the time. And how some mums prefer this. Anyone who prefers living on 4 hours broken sleep is a sadist. I am so tired I am dropping cups and plates when washing up. I am having to carry my baby downstairs by sitting as I'm in danger of falling. I am shaky, dizzy and have a very short temper.
I don't have anyone to help. My parents are 300 miles away and do come once a month and my in laws are just unhelpful to say the least. I've just moved to a new town so I don't know anyone yet.
The internet info said babied grow out of this within 15 months. I can't go on like this for a year, I just can't. Has anyone suffered this and overcome it? I keep bursting into tears which isn't like me at all.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 05/03/2013 10:38

Hi OP
First off, maybe think of getting a GP appointment this week, please don't think anyone will think badly of you if you are struggling.

Is your DH giving you a hand when he's home? Relocating is tough at the best of times. Any chance of telling your mum how things are, would she be able to visit for a week to give you a hand?

Do you bf or bottle feed, does your baby sleep in the same room? The feast or famine thing does wear you out when it's reverse cycle, I've not experienced it myself but can only imagine how worn out you must feel.

Sorry for the barrage of questions just trying to get a picture.

Purplecatti · 05/03/2013 11:02

She is breastfed. I have tried her on expressed in bottles but she will have none of it.
And for the most part she sleeps in a cot bed next to us. Sometimes she comes in our bed if she won't settle down again but it doesn't make her sleep longer and she won't feed with me lying down.
She is getting there with naps during the day now she was terrible a few weeks ago.
I'm reluctant to do the cry it out as I thought 4 months is too young for it? I have also tried to soothe her without feeding at night but she goes ballistic. I'm trying to feed her in a quiet dark room every few hours during the day but she has a few sucks and then gets cross. She's putting on weight and is a gorgeous baby otherwise. I just need her to do her 5 to 7 hour stints at night not during the day!

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 05/03/2013 11:58

If you need to catch up on zzzzzzs I'd try adjusting your sleeping habits before you tackle hers. Just take the phone off the hook, and sleep until DD wakes up.

Stimulating her in the day so she doesn't want to sleep, try playing, take her for a walk outside, tempt her by nursing or if you are up to it, give her daytime bath. I know you're shattered Purplecatti otherwise I'd suggest carrying her around a lot during the day. On the other hand, overstimulation could also contribute - she might be shutting out a loud and boisterous daytime atmosphere by sleeping through it.

During the day, you can talk directly to DD and play with her. At night, stick with low light, lullaby singing and quiet cuddling rather than direct eye contact. She's not wakeful because of over-heating is she? an above-normal body temperature could lead to wakefulness.

If she wakes up DD may not require instant attention if she's in a secure and interesting place. Eg a low light on and a few soft toys with her, or stickers on the ceiling to make it interesting.

Are you drinking too much coffee, tea, coke, ie containing caffeinewhich passes into breast milk? I wonder if you could cut down on if not avoid caffeine for several days. A neighbour of mine who was bf had to avoid drinking coffee after 3 pm.

Is DD ever "colicky"? Again not blaming you but maybe she is sensitive to food you eat and pass through breast milk. Evening might be the most painful time and morning more comfortable for her. That could explain her tendency to prefer sleeping during the morning.

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Purplecatti · 05/03/2013 12:24

Well so far our routine is roughly:
Wake at 7. Refuse feed or nurse for a few sucks.
Playtime: mat, mirror bouncer etc
Half 10: hour snooze. Maybe a feed. Not today.
12: try feeding. Out in the pram for a nap.
2: try feeding. Playtime.
3: try feeding. Sometimes she naps
4: play
5: nappy off time
6: tired grumbles
6 to 630: bath, big feed and bed. Bed times are not a problem at all.
then its shouting every hour and a half for food throughout the night. She did just two feeds yesterday and has refused eating since half 5 this morning.
I am off anything dairy and no caffeine.

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 05/03/2013 12:27

I don't know what I expect a HV to suggest but more than clucking sympathetically, no wonder you are wiped.

DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 05/03/2013 12:28

Okay, bedtime at 6:30 pm. What time does she surface demanding food?

Purplecatti · 05/03/2013 12:39

She'll sleep from about 7 to 730 until about 930.
Baby rice has been suggested by someone in the evening but I don't really know if that would help.

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 05/03/2013 12:43

Just wondered if you could push back her bedtime half an hour. I guess the idea about babyrice is so she has a fuller tum, it's a long time since I had little ones but I thought it was closer to 6 months for trying this?

Purplecatti · 05/03/2013 13:09

Well I've just managed to give her a feed. I put her upstairs to scream for 5 minutes (really not proud for that) before going in and she accepted the feed.

OP posts:
DonkeysDontRideBicycles · 05/03/2013 16:02

Opinion varies on this, if she is safe and warm and starts to cry, it is nerve shredding to hear her cry and of course you don't want her stressed but I don't think leaving her for a couple of minutes in case she drops off again will harm her.

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