My DS could have had a fatal accident today.....

[lovemynathy]

I just wanted to say to everyone it is never too much attention can be paid to your LO. We went to the soft play area today, it is in a huge hall and they separate the play area from the rest of the room by moving walls, they like huge boards on wheels. My DS went to one of them and was moving it a bit when one fell down, he fell on that one and then another fell down just couple cm from his head. And those boards are mega heavy. I don't want to think what could have happened. You will ask where I was at the time, I was watching him. I always try to give him space and try things. I didn't think that those boards would fall. But I should have been more clever, more careful, more...... Just to think that my stupid decision to not take him straight away from that board could have resulted in me coming back to empty home..... You can tell how bad I am I know and I accept my fault totaly, I just wanted to remind everyone how important it is to look after our little ones with huge care

Oh, poor thing, that's terrifying for everyone Did the soft play manager have anything to say? I would have gone insane at them!

Yesterday 13mo somehow managed to upturn one of those little plastic kitchin stool and fell on it, cutting her eyebrow badly. It's only afterwards that we realised she'd fallen on the upturned stool legs, and an inch lower and... shudder.

You're right to say you have to give them space to learn and explore, though.

How on earth is that your fault? That's a massive H&S issue!

They shouldn't just fall over, WTF, what did the manager say?

Did you fill in the accident book at the soft play place? I agree with Kiriwawa, this is a H&S issue - of course children are going to try and move screens etc. They should be sturdy enough to remain standing.

I would be looking at contacting the HSE to ask for their views on this. A young child shoudln't be able to topple these boards - not only could your DS have been squashed, he could also have knocked it over on top of another child / baby. Terrible.

I agree it's not your fault at all!!

What did the manager say?

That is awful, those boards should definitely not fall down. That is not your fault at all. Have you made a complaint? If not then you should, there could be a very serious injury in the future if they don't sort out the safety issues here.

Agree with everyone else - that was not your fault, the walls are dangerous and should be reported

O Gosh, I was in such a shock I didn't do anything, I thought what would I say?? I didn't look after my baby properly. But it got to me know that somebody else could do the same thing!!!!!! I am going to come back there and talk to them. My LO is asleep atm and I just want to cry and cry and cry, but it will be even more my fault if somethin like this happens to somebody else..... Thank you for opening my eyes

Absolutely not your fault, and you probably didn't realise the severity until you got home.

I'm actually about to contact the HSE myself as DS had a similar near miss last week. He tugged on a fire extinguisher at our local Children's Centre which came crashing off the wall. Luckily it missed DS and the crawling babies weren't nearby. I was so embarrassed, particularly as one of the crawling baby's mothers was quite sharp with me. I turned my back for 30 seconds to put a toy back in the cupboard when it happened. It wasn't until I got home that I realised that the extinguisher bracket was held on the wall with 2x2cm screws. It was an accident waiting to happen.

Definitely, definitely go back. And if they say you should have brought it up at the time, point out that you were in shock and all you wanted to do was get your son home.

Yes, definitely go back. Try and write it all down before you go, signed and dated and make yourself a copy.

It wasn't your fault in the slightest.

Could you ring them and let them know? Rather than having to go back?

You are not to blame in any way, and if an accident happens in the future it is still not your fault, it is their fault for having unsafe boards in a soft play area.

I can't imagine why anyone would think it is appropriate to have heavy boards that a small child can push over in a children's play place.

Hiya, just wanted to give a little update. I wrote a letter, as I know if I go there I will break in tears and will not make sence but I still didn't take it, will be there tomorrow. My friend went there and she said it has been closed for las 2 days, they said the will reopen on Mother's Day, I am not sure what it is about. But since then I have a horrible feeling following me that something is going to happen to my DS. I cannot get rid off it. It is just there all the time...... I cannot describe my thoughts.

You are on edge now, super alert in case something happens. This is natural after a shock, in the same way we pay closer attention if we have a near miss out driving, or skid on an icy pavement when hurrying in cold weather.

You were giving your DS freedom to explore in what you had assumed was a safe place. Not being negligent, watching him, sober.

Do you replay it in your mind? Talk it through with a friend or neighbour. With each telling of it you'll get it off your chest. When you next visit that place, take a look round. You know what happened and thankfully DS is all right. All you can do is weigh up situations, there is always a remote, outside chance of the unexpected.

Giving our children space to learn, to explore is important. They are not going to learn to exercise their own judgment and become independent if we stifle their instinct to discover things on the off-chance something calamitous might just happen. There are always a few heart-in-mouth moments in childhood, please don't feel DS is in daily peril.