Children sharing bedrooms - any thoughts?

[glassofwine]

Hi, I just wondered if any of you have any thoughts/advice on a dilema I have. I've got a dd6, dd4 and ds3 - the last two are 11 months apart - don't ask! We have three bedrooms and at the moment the two girls share and ds has his own room. However recently dd6 has been wishing she didn't have to share and ds3 has been saying he's frightened sleeping without a friend - he's the only one who has to sleep alone etc. I was wondering about changing things around so dd6 has own room and dd4 & ds3 share. The aditional advantage is that it means we can stay in this house for longer as was asuming we'd have to move in a couple of years as the girls may get fed up sharing when they get older. Disadvantages are boys and girls toys mixed up together etc. I don't know anyone else with mixed sex children sharing and I'm not sure how this will work in a couple of years. Help!

i think for the time being it's fine for the 2 younger ones to share.

but i think in a few years dd2 will also be wanting her own space, so you may well find yourself moving anyway!

dont; see mioxing boys and girls toys as a disadvantage - as with any room sharers they will benefit from learning to share toys, from respecting each others stuff, and will enjoy playing with stuff they hadn't thought about playing with before

DD (nearly 5) and DS2 (3) have shared since DS2 moved out of our room at 4mo. It's fine. It's a big room (DS1 has the little box room) and there are lots of toys (all over the house really) so the toy mix-up is not an issue. The only thing is that DD is the most likely child of the 3 to chatter on into the night (not really but later than the boys). Apart from that it's working OK. Think DD might want her own room in the next couple of years tho....

My dd and ds shared for about 2 years. They went back to separate rooms this year as dd now 7 and wanted her own space and ds now 4 was cramping her style when friends over etc. Worked well for our kids for that time tho'

dont worry about it, put them in the rooms they are happiest in for now. my ds (8) and dd (2) shared a room for a while until i got another room built and ds would grumble constantly. as soon as i got dd's room done ds grumbled that they couldnt watch a film or read together anymore....he "camped out" in her new room for ages!

mine are 9 and 8 and still sharing a room. each has their own "side" of the room and I let them decorate the walls on each side so one is girly and one is full of dinosaurs. I put a shelf on each side of the room for them so the girl puts up her dolls/books/girl stuff and the boyhas his pirates/dinosaurs etc. It's their special place for the "untouchable"stuff and the rull is no one can touch a childs stuff put safely on the shelf ( and it's too high for the younger siblings to get at). That really works and gives kids who have to share a sense of personal space in a crowded house. I have offered to move the boy in with his younger brothers and they both refuse. They are so close. We plan to get a bigger house in a year or so and will separate them then as the oldest girl will need her privacy but right now they are happy with the situation.

I think it sounds fine and will allow all their needs to be met and as you say give syou a couple of years at least before you need to think aobut coming up with another room - if it works out well then you may find they share happily for many years

Definitely put the two little ones in together - really shouldn't be a problem. Surely your older girl could continue to house most of the girly toys if there's loads?

I have a ds (just 7) and a dd (5.5) who've shared since dd was 4 months and it's always been fine. We're very squashed in, in that their bedroom is also their playroom, but with a wall of cupboards from Ikea it's all very manageable. And in the mornings they get up together and rampage around very happily (sometimes not even disturbing us for hours).

That said, at 7 we're just getting to the stage where ds needs his own space for homework and so on. So I am going to have to give up my cubbyhole study for it to be his bolthole - just big enough for a bed & cupboard. Dd will continue to have their "playroom" as her bedroom.

My ds2 and dd often like to sleep together (when not beating hell out of each other!) they are 10 and 8 and I don't mind them doing it occasionally when they don't need a good night's sleep for school (tend to whisper all night). They do have their stuff in their allotted rooms however. I do think though in a couple of years they won't want to do this! ds1 (12) is desperate for his own room too (natural with the eldest) but I'm afraid it's just tough unless we partition off a room. You may find it hard to get the two girls sharing again after a time apart (my fear with my boys).

mine were together for ages (dd who'll be 6 in August and ds who'll be 5 in Nov).

I think it's more to do with their sleeping habits (whether the sharing works). Ds wakes up early and dd likes to lie in a bit and got completely fed up with him waking her up in the morning. Dd got over tired and quite teary (and it was obviously affecting her) so we've moved her out temporarily.

It's probably worth trying it out to see what happens. Good luck.

Thanks everyone for all your help and advice. I think we'll give it a go, but am slightly aprehensive as we'll have to buy a new single bed as bunks in the 'sharing' room and a cotbed without sides in the single room. DD too big for cotbed - don't you just know that as soon as we've paid for a new bed that they'll all hate the new arrangement. oh well