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Original poster

Ideas for dd's homecoming?

19 replies

SenoraPostrophe · 19/01/2004 16:10

I'm probably just worrying over nothing here but...

In case you missed my other thread, dd has been in hospital for over a week, during which time I gave birth to her baby brother. They now say they think she may be able to come home tomorrow afternoon (hooray! ). It may not be tomorrow but it should be this week.

But the poor love has just had a week of big upheaval (and she has only seen me for about an hour a day as I'm b/fing and can't take baby near the children's ward) and I'm worried about the effect of another big change when she gets home.

I have a present for her (she loves those), dp is taking a few days off work and we'll make sure I'm not holding ds when she gets home, but is there anything else we can do to make things as easy as possible for her? Am I worrying over nothing? (she will see me much more than she has done this week at least. but then she has had one-to-one attention from an adult at all times this week too. Which she won't get for much longer obviously)

OP posts:

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zebra · 19/01/2004 16:12

I would guess the relief of being home will override anything else. When my kids are away for more than a few days they come home and just play and play with all of their missed toys, completely ignoring us and not demanding anything. So sorry you're going through all this, SP. Just get lots of treats in for her (?DVDS?) and give her as many cuddles as you can spare.

Twinkie · 19/01/2004 16:31

Streamers - Balloons - cake - just a big girly fuss that should take her mind off of anything else - can you get a group togther for a big homecoming - friends, relatives that kind of thing (well fo course not Abba or Wham!!)

LIZS · 19/01/2004 16:36

If she's still not 100% then perhaps hold off the visitors for a day or so. I'm sure she will just relish the familiarity of home and being with you, hard though I know it will be with ds there. Indulge her a bit too. Could you plan something more exciting for the later in the week, a trip out to a favourite spot or something which she's really enjoyed before.

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Jaybee · 19/01/2004 16:38

I have seen your other thread but remind me how old she is.... Does she know that she now has a baby brother? Have you talked about him at all, could you make sure that the present is from 'Lucas probably' - to me, it sounds as though the next week will be spent with the three of you tucked up in bed watching videos, reading books, bfing, cuddling and snoozing - sounds heavenly.

Blu · 19/01/2004 16:50

Phew, I haven't posted on your threads, but have been really feeling for you. I would guess that lots of quality snuggling and cuddling time will be her top priority, and ordinary thngs that give her the security of life with you. Her most familiar comforting foods, her favourite bedclothes and jimjams, and maybe a special present to say how brave and grown up she has been? I suspect that YOU feel like a big celebration of the noisy kind, but she may need the opposite....In any case, being together as a family again will be the best celebration for ALL of you. I am very hapy that she is coming home.

ThomCat · 19/01/2004 16:57

Ahh, bless you!
How about getting in the ingrediants to make a cake together? You could say you'll help her make it for her new baby brother?
You could do something grown-up for her like put some flowers in her room to welcome her home, but also add a card and a big pink balloon to the flowers???
Make her a badge that says' now I'm better I'm going to be the best big sister in the world'.

SO very pleased she'll be home with you all soon

Blu · 19/01/2004 17:00

ThomCat, those are such LOVELY suggestions. Aaaaaaah!

Original poster

SenoraPostrophe · 19/01/2004 17:19

I think she'll like the cake idea. She is only 20 months so we haven't told her about her brother (worried I'll confuse her although she may understand). But things like standing on chairs in the kitchen are things she very raely gets to do. I'll get the ingredients in!

I've been wavering between having lots of people here and not having anyone myself. I think I'm coming down on the side of it being just us.

OP posts:

Jaybee · 19/01/2004 17:22

In your shoes I think I would just have your four together - I think it will be too much for you and dd to have a house full of people. It may be worth asking friends not to call for a few days either.

bunny2 · 19/01/2004 17:26

I'd keep it low-key, I definately wouldnt invite friends. A present from Lucas sounds like a lovely idea but too much more might be overwhelming. I hope she does come home tomorrow xx

ThomCat · 19/01/2004 17:27

Ahhhhhhhhh - didn't realise she was only 20 months - little pickle.
Ahh, well maybe the cake idea then and other than that lots of books and Disney DVDs and stuff.
Maybe you can also help her to make a card for him as well?
She'll be fine hon'.

Personally I'd really limit visits from other people for a while and then let some start trickling through.

Post won't you, let us know when she's home and how it all is etc.

suedonim · 19/01/2004 17:30

Like Zebra, I think your dd will be just be incredibly relieved to be home again. She may well be a bit disoriented after her hospital stay and probably feeling quite weak still, so I'd hold off any big celebrations for now. Ime, they're looking for familiarity and routine when they get home and want to check out their toys and so on.

Watch out for yourself, too, SP. After being under such stress you might find you have a sort of rebound, feeling flat and so on. If it happens, don't worry, it will pass soon. Best wishes to you all.

zebra · 19/01/2004 18:16

I didn't realise she was under 2, SP. This must be so grueling for you.

sobernow · 19/01/2004 18:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

JanH · 19/01/2004 19:21

I agree with the "everything as normal" brigade - after all, Lucas-Probably being there will make it very different! Making a cake sounds like a lovely idea if she's up for it - otherwise the normal "bringing new baby home to big sister" advice, only in reverse obviously, where you are baby-free as much as poss and devote yourself to her. L-P won't mind and she's really going to need you.

Having said that - because you've not been able to spend much time with her she just might be a bit sulky towards you, in which case you'll have to play it by ear, but otherwise what she's going to want is cuddles, bigtime.

So glad she's coming home

Hulababy · 19/01/2004 19:42

Glad to here that DD can come home very soon SP. I would go for keeping everything low key. Present for her, and a gentle introduction to her baby brother.

Blackduck · 19/01/2004 19:53

I only have one babe, so don't really know much about this how to introduce one to the other, but friends have said the present for dd should be in ds's cot so it looks like it comes from him....

WideWebWitch · 19/01/2004 20:15

I'm pleased she's coming home soon too Senora. What a couple of weeks you've had. I hope you get looked after too in all this. Hugs to all of you.

bloss · 20/01/2004 01:23

Message withdrawn

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