Breastfeeding in Bed. Do I need to get rid of the duvet

[oohlaalaa]

We?re not planning to co-sleep as such, as baby will sleep in his/her cot. My DH does not want to share bed with baby, but happy for me to feed baby in bed, and understands if I fall asleep during feed, there may be cosleeping.

I may also sit up and feed baby, it depends what works for us. I?m 20 days from due date.

The plan is to put the cot next to bed, to be a barrier to stop baby falling out, when I?m feeding baby, and I?ll be feeding baby in the recovery position facing baby, so if I do fall asleep will not smother him/her.

If I do fall asleep during feed, there will potentially be some co-sleeping. At NCT sales I?ve bought five second hand grobags, all different togs and sizes, for first year. I have sheets and blankets (bought four lightweight blankets for first year, as thought would be useful for pushchair carrycot), but planned to use grobags at night. I?m concerned that we have a duvet on our bed. We are very tight for money at the moment, and I don?t want to change to blankets for us. Can I pick up baby in his/her grobag, and pull the duvet away from baby, with baby sleeping next to me, on the sheets. Is this dangerous? Do I need to get blankets for our bed?

Not all babies stay curled up, my boys stretched out asap as soon as they were born but they were big babies is 10lb 13oz and I am small so they must have been very squashed!

Dd was only 8lb and stayed scrunched up much longer, it was lovely actually as she stayed a newborn for longer whereas the boys seemed like three mth olds within a week!

No they are all curled up when they are born, rounded back, scrunched arms and legs. If you put them down on their backs then they roll to one side or the other because they aren't flat! This is very cute to witness. Gradually they straighten out over a few weeks, some quicker than others.

Oh that has made me broody and I don't even want anymore babies!

Ali my first four straightened out straight away, I am sure they had been so squashed they were like 'thank fuck' even the midwives commented on it and their really good head control.

Then dd was all dinky and scrunched up it was lovely!

DD2 always fed under our quilt between DH and me first and then in the crock of my arm on the outer edge second. We only have a standard double quilt and she never seemed to get too hot under the edge.

Loads of unbelievably complex advice these days, which I'm jolly glad is new.

5mad - my two didn't take long, they were big and I am very short so they were really scrunched up! DS1 took about 3 weeks to uncurl, DS2 it was a matter of days and he could lift his head up when he was only a couple of days old.

Ah lovely squidgey newborns.

I have 4 dcs and have done different things with different babies. I think it's easier to be safer with blankets for grown ups rather than a duvet round waist and baby on top. Since dc3 we have used adult sized cellular blankets. you can get them online.

Don't expect necessarily to be able to breastfeeding lying down from birth. It might take a few weeks to get the hang of it. Sitting up cross-legged or with pillow under your knees might be easier to begin with. Also worth thinking about how you might feel about dh in bed with you. This might take you by surprise. Lots of people find they don't like having baby and dad in bed together, even if just breastfeeding and not planning to co-sleep.

this site is a really good one to look around.

Yep same here I am short and they were long and big, they were relieved to be able to stretch I think! But dd was only 8lb and shorter and stayed scrunched up for longer it was lovely.... Runs away before getting broody...

Not much cuddling??
DD2 was born at home, DH was cuddled up behind me so I could lie on my side and try feed her from the first night of her life.

Actually it's jolly hard to feed a newborn lying down. Much much easier when they have a bit of head control and stay on even if you fall a sleep.

Honestly normal light winter or summer duvet and heating on low, you and the baby and DH can all share a duvet no trouble at all.

Truly the baby will only get too hot between you and DP or if you have a quilt bigger than your bed, which I know a lot of people do. That might have made it hard to be sure there wasn't spare quilt to ride up over her face and it would make the edge of the bed far warmer than it is.

It's better if the duvet is not a synthetic one. I have never quite understood the risk of duvets, nor been able to find the evidence behind it. I do remember that a long time ago it was found that feather and down duvets prevented over heating and were good for eczema suffers and I have used one ever since. My DS slept with me under the duvet as a baby. We did the whole separate blanket thing at first but soon got bored with that.

In Japan, where everyone traditionally co-sleeps, they traditionally have duvets and I'm guessing that if it was really dangerous, they wouldn't have such a huge population. Don't know what their duvets are traditionally filled with though .

Thanks all.

I'd not known about uncurling. I'm 5'11 and all body, so not sure how curled up baby will be. So exciting!

The cotbed is at MIL. I've decided when we get baby home, to just have him/her in the moses basket, with cellular blankets, and sit up to feed.

It'll probably take us up to a fortnight till cot bed is set up. I'll set it up so that one side is down, and it's flush with my side of bed.

I'll have to work out what works for us, in terms of duvet or just wearing a dressing gown and bed socks to keep warm.