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Nipping shouty-ness in the bud with terrible 2.2 yo

4 replies

matana · 28/01/2013 15:43

That's it really. I say 'terrible' because that's what he's been for around a week now. On the whole, he's gorgeous - happy, spirited, active, sociable, loving etc. But he's going through a phase that includes: getting easily frustrated; throwing things; throwing himself backwards onto the floor for the smallest of reasons; crying much more than usual; hitting; pushing; fiddling (with everything, all the time - seemingly in rotation while i follow him around switching off appliances etc); saying 'no' constantly - even when what you're asking him to do is 'nice' or 'enjoyable'; lying on top of the cats/ hitting them with small plastic dinosaurs and just laughing in response to our protests. Nothing we do or say gets through to him, however we do or say it - he just doesn't listen or even seem to care. All i've seemed to do this weekend is raise my voice with him, and that's just not like me as i'm very patient and don't think that shouting achieves the best outcome. Usually, i just ask him calmly not to bash the TV (for example), because it will break - and the next time he does it i will take said toy away. But he is testing my patience continually and i'm afraid i shouted a few times this weekend.

There has been no change in his routine. He is naturally a very spirited, inquisitive little boy and we've learned to embrace his, ahem, very active disposition while trying to give him some boundaries. But this latest phase makes all others prior to this pale into insignificance. We tell him regularly that we love him, and cuddle and kiss him regularly without bounds, we tell him what a good job he's doing when he's doing something well, we talk to him all the time (his speech is brilliant - lots of sentences, he's able to communicate his needs well and says 'please' without reminder on many occasions etc) and his level of understanding is closer to that of a 3 year old. I know he's now in the 'Terrible Twos' but please help me nip the shouting in the bud! It's so, so hard and i feel like such a failure and wonder if it's my fault because i work FT. My time with him is too short to spend it making him unhappy.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
IDismyname · 28/01/2013 15:48

Maybe start up a star chart with a treat at the end of the day? He may be a bit young - but you would know.

Above all, 'Praise the Good and Ignore The Bad'.

It IS a phase - just a phase. It will get better. He's just growing up.

Good Luck!

Oh, and a large glass of Wine after bedtime!

Troubleintmill · 28/01/2013 15:49

I don't really have any advice as such as have a very similar problem with my very similar DS (2.3)! I am a SAHM though so I can only say I doubt the behaviour is caused because you work FT. I wonder if my DS is bored of me-we always blame ourselves I guess as we can't seem to find another explanation except that it may be a phase!?
My DS's behaviour is very erratic and can be an angel one min and a terror the next! I try to give him enough f

Troubleintmill · 28/01/2013 15:52

Sorry, posted too soon!
....food and he has enough sleep though does seem to tire easily. I find if he's hungry, thirsty or tired the "bad" behaviour is worse. Do you find this too? How is he with his carets while you are at work?
Sympathy and support....hoping it gets better soon!

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matana · 28/01/2013 15:58

Thanks so much for your replies. Yes, i've been reaching for the Wine a fair bit recently! And not always after he's in bed Blush

Yes, Trouble i do find that his behaviour is worse when he's tired or hungry so i carry around a stack of healthy food and shovel it in when he begins to get crabby! When i dropped him off at his CM this morning i said to her: "Good luck!" DH collected him earlier and apparently she reported the same issues to him. So at least that gives me some reassurance that he's not acting out at me. As you say, we always blame ourselves!

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