Career mums - when is a good time to have number 2

[hayesgirl]

I have just qualified as a solicitor and have a 17 month DS. I put my training contract on hold for 9 months when I had my DS and my original plan was to wait a year or 2 after qualifying before having another one. However I I don't know whether it would be better to have one sooner then I can concentrate on my career with no other breaks

Probably a controversial topic for some who don't agree with career mums but that's not my intention.

Thanks

I'm not sure it's so much about "career mums" as "lawyer mums" and even then it depends on lots of things if you are trying to minimise the impactt on your career. What kind of firm do you work in/want to work in? Where? What area of law? Do you want a part time role when you go back? The partner in M&A in a high end London firm (or worse still, US firms in London) might have a different attitude to the impact on your career of a period of maternity leave than a smaller practice with lots of working mums. It's hard to generalise, of course, but IME of two (both London, but one English and one US) firms, you could stay on the career track if you kept your Blackberry on during labour and took your minimum maternity leave but otherwise you were sent to the mummy track. Women partners either had no kids or one child but took almost no maternity leave and never returned part-time. The Managing Partner in the firm I worked in told a young Associate that you could be a lawyer or a mother but you couldn't do both! Obviously not everyone is like this, but I still think the answer to your questions very much depends on where you work and who you work for, as well as how much staying on the career track means to you.
Also, do you need/want enhanced maternity pay - if you do in a London firm you might find you need to work for a minimum time before you qualify for anything other than statutory.
Best of luck.

Quite honestly from a career pov there is never a good time to have another. Ime it nearly always has an adverse impact. Therefore stop thinking about your career as the decider. HAve another baby when you feel the gap is right for your family.

I had three years between dd1 and dd2. That was a decent gap for us. Minimised childcare costs as I didn't go bacl to work till dd2 was 18 months and dd1 only a few months off school.

I waited until I was in a settled period at work, having spent a few years qualifying and then another 3 years getting established before TTC. Now I'm pregnant with number 2 and there'll be about a 2 year gap between them. It's a good time for me as I've got all of the studying out of the way but I'm not high enough at work to have too much in the way of responsibility. I also moved jobs after number 1, which reduces the perceived impact as I haven't taken two periods of leave with the same employer.

I agree that there's never a right time as any period of leave will affect your career, and you can never predict how pregnancy will affect you.

I work for a mid sized firm in Leeds. I've worked there 7 years and whilst I have never made any secret that I want another baby I haven't exactly advertised it! All the partners are men and none of them were about for their kids by their own admission. I don't want to go back part time but there were comments made to a secretary who had 2 maternity breaks. There is only one other solicitor who has had 2 kids, she only works part time (well in the office anyway!) but last year they made her a partner!

You're right though, don't think there is ever a good time!

There will be 20 months between dd and dc2 (due next week). It wasn't that carefully planned but has worked pretty well for my career. I was back at work for ten months which was long enough to get a promotion and get established in my new role. It did mean interviewing while I was pregnant, though.

In your case I might be tempted to wait until you're established in your role. I think employers and colleagues are more tolerant towards taking maternity leave when they know that you're an asset to the team.

There's never a good time career wise but you can get an idea of how anti family a firm is by looking at the number of female partners and people working part time. I would definitely wait until you qualify for mat pay though - in most places this is 2 years - it will make things a lot easier and 2 years is a good amount of time to at least get a handle on your area of practice.

I suppose I am/was a career woman but in a different field ,and one where working part-time is very much an option.I was firmly established in my career before I had children and since having them have never really been able to offer the level of commitment at work that I could make before kids.Despite all the work I put in earlier my career has suffered as a result although I wouldn't change it.I found my priorities changed after children,as there was always a deadline to get home by and consequences if I didn't make it which were far more important than anything else.Also any extra meetings outside of normal working hours etc have to be organised and paid for in terms of childcare.I am just about to go on maternity leave for the 3rd time in 4 years.When I return to work I will have to get a nanny ,it is the only childcare option that will work for 1 school age & 2 nursery age children.I was older having children due to taking a while to find Mr Right, so spacing them out (or not,18m & 23m!)was dictated by
age,rather than career.If you are young and have to get yourself established it might be better to wait and get on with your career before having another one.On the other hand if you have another one soon and then get some really watertight childcare so you can fully commit to whatever they expect of you,you can really make the career a priority after baby no.2.And nannies are most cost effective for 2+ kids if you need childcare outside of the family.I think it is really hard ,but not impossible,to have a good family life and a career .You have to find the right balance for your own circumstances.