Over the last year or so, my two sons (12 and 6)have got worse and worse when out in company together. They make a devilish combination - lots of winding each other up, teasing, pushing the limits, loudness, sly pushing and shoving, competing for my attention, ignoring instructions and defying threats of punishment. This can happen when we are alone at home, but at least they can go into separate rooms/watch TV to calm down. Their combined behaviour is worse when we are out.
But they get on well on the whole. In between the shoves and kicks, they hug a lot, share jokes and the teasing often has an affectionate edge. When they defy me they often do it together forming a united front of badness.
I've tried talking to them separately, especially my oldest son. Now he's at secondary school shouldn't he really be getting past playfighting, teasing and larking around with a six year old in the street? DS1 should surely have the maturity to know when enough is enough. He is so fond of appearing 'cool' in public and really, this behaviour is anything but. All this falls on deaf ears.
Both sons can be lovely people. They certainly know how to behave in public and can be very sociable and civilised when they want to be.
As soon as either ds1 or ds2 are apart from each other, their behavior changes for the better within minutes.
So, my solution has been to split them up and take out each son separately when at all possible. For instance, at the weekends ds1 goes to theatre and cricket clubs (which he likes)so I take out ds2 alone.
On holiday over Easter this splitting up was not so possible and they were a nightmare together.
Any tips?
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Parenting
angelic apart but devilish together - coping strategies for 6 and 12 year old needed!
5 replies
tigermoth · 20/04/2006 07:13
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