Terrified of her starting nursery

[Cbell]

Just that...

My DD is two years old and has been at home with me all this time. However, now I'm expecting our second child (July) Ive been thinking it would be easier if she was in nursery some of the time. I'm considering three mornings a week but I'm terrified.

She's a delightful little girl and very attached to mummy. It's not that I'm projecting my anxiety onto her I know, know, know my child and she will find my leaving her at nursery so distressing. I'm a teacher and have worked in nurseries so understand the settling in procedure but I'm terrified of the heart ache I'm going to cause my little one.

I know there will be benefits once she's settled, lots of lovely things to do, children to play with and I would love the time to spend with my NB but....

I am agonising over this decision....

I think you need to concentrate on what it will give you rather than focusing on the possible negatives. I think having our DC going off to nursery / CM is always very hard for us and so far I've found that it's very rare that it ends up being a traumatic experience for child or mother.

I was a wreck the week before DD went to her CM when I RTW but guess what? It was absolutely fine and I am feeling better in myself having some more adult time and DD loves it as she is off to parties, soft play and meeting other children.

In your case, it will give you some much needed time to bond with your new DC. I would go for it, if I were you.

I really wouldn't sweat it till the day. She might surprise you. Kids usually do. And if she doesn't like it, try again a bit later when she's older and a bit more confident.

She will be a different child in a year. Especially when the terrible twos kick in and you've got a small baby as well. You'll be glad to let her go.

My 16 month old DD just started last week at nursery, 2 mornings a week. I felt exactly as you do - I knew she'd hate to be separated from me, and dreaded her first day. But it was fine! Yes, she was a bit upset, but they do such fun things and she was distracted with all the new toys, and oh my god it's so nice to get a morning off to myself!

My ds started nursery when he was 18mo, one day a week initially. Yes it was hard to start with, he cried when I dropped him off and I would go sit in my car and cry. The creche workers were fab though and made me stay one time to watch him sneakily through the window, to show me that in two minutes he was fine and happily playing with the other children. One day a week in hindsight was harder for him to settle into, as if he'd gone more often it would have become a regular routine more quickly. 2 or 3 mornings a week is better. My ds is now 4 and a happy, sociable little guy. He is very friendly and will go up and introduce himself to other children when we go out places like the park. I think creche has done him a lot of good in that respect and made starting school last year much easier. It's hard at first, but really beneficial in the long run. I am going to return to work next September after mat leave, when my dd will be 11 months. She'll be going to creche 3 days a week and yes I am dreading it, but more because she'll be younger than ds was. I still think when we've got past the initial hard bit it will be good for her. Plus, do remember that making life a little easier for yourself makes you a better, more patient and less frazzled, mummy. x