tooth brushing

[SecrectFarleysNibbler]

Dd (14mth) has gnashers at last! Been looking at tooth brushing and it says that they should spit out but how do you get a 14 mth old to do that???? Am I missing something?

As long as you only use a small scraping of toothpaste don't worry about spitting out. Up to three years old ingesting toothpaste can cause fluorosis( white flecking ) in the adult teeth that are developing in the gums. So you need to use a very small amount of an age appropriate toothpaste.
Don't allow children to eat toothpaste. After 3 you can use more toothpaste since the front adult teeth are pretty much formed. Always supervise brushing and try to brush your DCs teeth first then let them have a go. It will be a battle at times but persevere because a child with tooth ache is your worst nightmare.
Diet is important. There is plenty of info via google on healthy eating for teeth. It will come as no surprise that eating habits that lead to obesity also cause tooth decay.

we used to blow raspberries at the sink, and still do sometimes even though she's 4

It's impossible! My 4yo still swallows half his toothpaste. Use a small pea sized amount of age-appropriate toothpaste and demonstrate spitting at the same time every time you brush their teeth so eventually they start to copy you.