Dc's friends coming over - etiquette?

[perceptionInaPearTree]

This is a friend who hasn't been here before. Usually when we arrange for a friend to come (the girls are 9), the other mum and I arrange time about a week before, as I just have for another friend of dd's in fact.

Dd's friend in question was supposed to come over this Saturday as it's dd's birthday and I was going to take them to the cinema/Nandos. The girl's mum said she would be able to come some time ago, then when school ended she said she would email me later or call to let me know the time and seemed unwilling to fix a time then. Well that was nearly a week ago and I've heard nothing!

Should I try to contact her or just leave it? I don't like chasing people iyswim.

It's your DDs birthday so I think it's time to arrange something certain or line up an alternative

Does she know it's a birthday treat?

Also agree she might be run ragged, this is the traditional time for a bit of a meltdown.

Jsut ring her

Yes she does know it's for her birthday. Dd and her have definitely not fallen out. Dd always has her class party after Christmas because with it being on the 22nd we've found that, understandably people can't make it that close to Christmas or forget. She just has one friend on her actual birthday.

Surely you should be telling her what time to dop off her DD since you want to see a film and then go for a meal? Saying the film starts at 11 doesn't tell the mother what time you need to leave home at and might get you a houseguest too early/late.

I already tried to arrange a time with her last Friday when our dds finished school but she clearly didn't want to and said she would contact me. Whatever happens dd will have a nice birthday.

Just ring her - or text or email - it's not unreasonable or naggy. Give her a get out clause and have a plan B!

Ok, thanks.