What's your 'routine' with your 3 month old?

[ehmumbo]

DS2 is 12 weeks old and DS1 is 3y. So far have been feeding DS2 on demand and just letting him nap whenever he does (usually in the buggy when we are out and about with his big brother for 2-3 couple of hours in the morning then on and off in the afternoon for shorter bursts.

Seem to remember that I just went with the flow (as it were) with DS1 re: feeding and sleeping too but can't really remember.

Then my MIL started banging on about some amazing baby sleep book the other day and I just feel like i looked through all the books and at all the theories the first time round and am really not prepared to formula feed (no judgement on those who do I just don't want to) OR use controlled crying - so, in my opinion there is not really any other option than to have my baby beside me in the night and breast feed - which I'm fine with, just wondering what others are doing during the day re: naps really - sorry my sleep addled brain is making this a very rambling post!

so, what do you do?? :)

same as you, just going with the flow. DS2 is almost 8 months and it still seems preferable to making any effort. he just feeds to sleep after listening to DS1's bedtime story and them both getting teeth brushed.

he tends to get sleepy at similar times each day, so we just go with that.

I formula feed and I dont have or intend to have a routine with DD2. DD1 was in a routine of sorts but she did that entirely herself.

Do people see ffeeding as a way to get a routine?

No sorry was meaning the whole idea of these baby sleep training plans that claim to get babies to sleep through for 12 hours - I just never met a baby who was breast fed who managed to sleep that long before eating solids - the thing with formula is (as i understand it) is that you can fill them up for longer - hence the longer stretches of sleep.

Think it was the Sensational Baby Sleep Plan that my MIL was going on about - but when questioned re: how these babies her friends know are fed it is with formula.

Just interested to hear what routines others are in with their little ones more than anything else...

Yes, I see what you mean about the filling up for longer.

I suppose my opinion is that if breastfed babies cant go 12 hours then babies are not meant to go 12 hours! :)

Ds is now 4 months, ebf and we only have a vague routine for bed time. He sort of has a pattern during the day: eat, activity, sleep. But he's rubbish at napping so always falls asleep on me before being transfered to his basket.

Between getting colds, sleep regression and now teething I decided there's no point trying to impose a routine as he needs all the sleep he can get - currently has a stinking cold, poor mite.

If he doesn't start falling into a more regular routine around 6 months I'll probably start trying to encourage one.

Oh, should add that at night he feeds/settles 8-9pm, 1-2am, 4-5am. Wakes around 7am and wants a morning nap by 9am. Times vary by an hour .

He was merging the two middle feeds into one at 3-4am but the last growth spurt scuppered that

Dd is 5 mo. I basically limit her sleep post 2.30 to 30 mins and have a bedtime routine that starts 5.30 but the rest of the day is ad hoc. She normally goes back for a nap within 2 hrs of waking and then another around lunchtime if we're home but other days its more shorter naps in the car, pushchair or sling. Second children just have to do that I think. I'm through with trying to make her sleep through ( no pun intended) until she's at least 6 mo

I do what you do, just go with the flow.

Everytime I speak to my dad, without fail he asks 'is he sleeping through yet?' NO, NO he ISN't!! :)

Ds2 willbe 13 weeksmonday. I haven't forced a routine. Ds2 has made it for himself. He's exc bf. he will feed, be awake then sleep after two hours of awake time. He slept with me most nights til about a week ago cos of a cold and reflux. He's now on gaviscon and last night slept in his crib from 1120 til 650. His best night so far. The longest he seems to go is 6 hours. He seems to get that you sleep longer at night. Ds1 was the same. Oh and ds2 was fed two hourly for first two months and now feeds 3 hourly +.

DS was 6 weeks early and is now 12 weeks. If he's awake more than about 1.5h he starts to get a bit upset during the day, so I usually feed when he wakens, then start to get ready to tuck him in for a nap after about 1h 15.

Overnight, he has a feed at midnight, then is sleeping til about 4.30/ 5pm. A routine is evolving, but since he is BF I have been going with the flow from the outset (well, once I got him out of SCBU where they seemed to having him feeding every 3 hrs, and that went completely out the window from the first night I spent with him!!).

sleeps till about 4.30-5am, not pm!! He is a good baby, but not quite that good!!

My first baby was bf and slept through the night before he was on solids. It was when he started solids it all went tits up.

We used to go with the flow but used to make sure that before bath he had a feed and obviously after the bath before bed he had a big feed. Didn't work with my DD though

Thanks for the replies - interesting to see what other people are up to.

We've had a couple of 4 hour stretches from 10pm - 2am, but tbh have just lazily been feeding him in bed as I'm so bloody tired I really can't be bothered to keep getting up and putting him back in his basket. (also I do quite like to nice warm snuggly baby snuffling away next to me - feels somehow reassuring to smell him and hear him breathing ahhh)

Thing is that this is the same thing I instinctively did with DS1 and then ended up co-sleeping until about 10 months when I thought 'shit I need him to sleep through the night before I go back to work in a month!" ...

...at which point I went a bit mad , read loads of books and we did a 'gentle encouragement' type sleep training with DH sat in the room and gradually moving nearer the door (whilst I lay in bed with radio 4 on full volume and a pillow over my head in floods of tears) - horrendous but he got it in about 3 nights.

So was thinking I might try a bit more of a planned strategy earlier on this time round - something like you are up to QT sounds like a good plan!

@ Hyperballad: yes really could do WITHOUT people asking if he sleeps through yet - what a thing to ask!

Def agree people should do hat they feel happy with ( its just that this can change).

Also have to remember that something is only a problem if you feel stressed by it - still good to get an idea of the different ways people deal with it. So thanks :)

And apologies that the above is so waffly - am fairly sleep deprived and DH is watching DAVE as I type which is quite distracting... off to brush my teeth now

Why tell the truth?

If you are happy, baby is happy then if people ask you, just say 'yes, he is sleeping through' (you don't have to qualify it in terms of hours or minutes) - be confident in your parenting. It seems to me that people feel the need to fudge the facts, or get defensive, if they are not totally happy/confident in their choices.

FYISW I did do controlled crying, I was happy with it, my DS slept happily in his own bedroom and I fed him once during the night until he was 6-7 months but I genuinely can't remember anyone asking me what hours he slept, it just wasn't a topic for conversation . Unless you go round in a state of exhaustion how is the topic going to come up ?.

Second what QTPie said.

Up until a couple of weeks ago, LO was sleeping 7-7 with 1 or 2 feeds (from about 9 wks). BF and in cot in own room. No special sleep training needed, just gentle encouragement by listening and watching cues, so it can be done.

Now dealing with teething, 4 month sleep regression and a tongue tie feeding issue but sure really hope we'll be back on track soon.

My ds is 3 months and only routine he has is at night. He has his last feed at around 8ish then he goes in his cot. He then wakes for a feed at 4am and goes for another sleep till 7.30 ish . I don't know why or how we managed it, this routine just happened. As for the day time there isn't really a routine. I feed him when he needs it and he only sleeps on Mr or in the pram if we are out. He is bottle fed and he has the same amount at each feed x