Fear of Fire

[Katherine]

DS (5.5) has suddenly developed a fear of fire at bedtime. It takes him over an hour to get to sleep and he keeps calling us almost in tears saying he's scared there will be a fire. He's worried that all his toys and his bed will burn.

I spent most of Christmas telling my in-laws that eastenders wasn't suitable for small kids but it seems they couldn't wait for the 10pm rerun on sky and one day when I was washing up they had it on. DS saw the bit where the minibus caught fire. Don't know if this is where its come from (he's not worried in the car) but whatever its horrible to see him upset and it means he's over-tired and grumpy in the mornings.

I've tried talking to him, reassured him, shown him the smoke alarm etc but he's still terrified. I even wondered about getting a firefighter costume for a bit of role play/ play therapy but I know I can't fix this just by buying something. Maybe its just a phase but has anyone got any other suggestions on how to help.....?

What about having a little experiment in the kitchen to explain him that you need three things to make fire and if one is loosing (the flame) he is safe? it may help him to understand that fire just doesn't start spontaneously or, what about making him feel safer by putting a smoke alarm at his room (I know is a bit far fetched but, who knows? it may work )

Katherine, i have pondered on this and don't really know , but i'd do what you're doing and to to him in daytime about it.
Also just a thought, show him that you've turned off power points to the toaster, kettle ect and explain that there can't be a fire there.
Show him a gas ring(if you have gas) then turn it off and explain that a fire couldn't start there. Ask him where he thinks the fire will start and then try to explain why it won't! It's all i can think at the moment but good luck.
If that fails howabout buying a small fire blanket and explaining to him that IF there ever was a fire, this tool could help put it out?

If you live in the London area they have been running adverts on the radio about people burning to death because they didn't have a smoke alarm.We had the same trouble at bedtime with our son turned out he had been listening to this and taking it all in.I let him check the smoke alarm with me for a few nights and it seemed to put his mind at rest.

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Thanks all. Idea of trip to firestation sounds exciting. I'll give them a ring and see if they do anything. Also idea of a fire extinguisher in his room is a great idea. We have an alarm on the light so I might let hom have a play with that too. His biggest concern is that all his toys will burn so maybe I need to leave him a big bag, but then thats not really proper protocol is it.

BTW just noticed that this thread starting about 8 times for some reason. Ooops and sorry.

Katherine (my real name too - and right spelling!!) I don't suppoese you're in Dorset are you? I work for the Fire Service and one of my jobs is to arrange for firefighters to come into schools and talk to the children - this starts at playgroup level.
If you look in the phone book for your local Community Safety dept I am sure they will be able to sort out something (obviously with the schools consent) - imagine how proud he'd be if a firefighter turned up on his mummy's say so.
My ds is exactly the same age and has an extremely healthy respect for fire - far better that not realising the consequences surely?
We talk about escape routes - which isn't as scary as it sounds - we make it a game - if a fire started "here" (specify spot in house) what would we do - where is the safe way out etc etc. Obviously this is my "pet" subject and could waffle on for hours - please feel free to mail me if you want specifics - leaflets etc.
But do try your local Fire Service - this is exactly the kind of thing they are pushing right now and will be only too pleased to help - catch them young!