anyone else parenting dc1 with SEN and dc2 g&t? I need tips...

[MrsShrek3]

ds1 mainstream high school and doing well (for him) has sen. ds2 G&T in maths and reading, and sport. It's like learning to be a parent all over again, they're so different. clues please?

We've got it all going on here. Cerebral palsy, ADHD, aspergers traits, anxieties, phobias, gifted, kids bursting into tears because the other one can spell broccoli (I can't). All part of life's rich pattern.

If it helps, I think every kid is like learning to parent all over again. no two ever the same. sometimes I look at these three and wonder if they are at all related...

Hi Mad, I was thinking of you as I wrote the post...thank you for wandering in It's bonkers innit?! My dc look the same, but no further similarities ds2 is already past ds1 academically, three years younger. sigh.

I have the other way around. DS was super clever with things like letters, numbers, factoids etc at a very early age. DD at 3 cannot communicate properly and has ASD.

And yes, bizarre to see how alike they look when they are so different!

I have three that are G&T in their own ASD kind of way, fab at memorising dates and word perfect on DVD recitals. My three go to SN school, Twin DDs will be leaving in July as they will be 19, they specialise in the works of Barney that purple dinosaur, Ds who is fifteen is currently obsessed with dogs. I wish they could apply their focus to other stuff too

I don't have a DC with SN, but I do have the issue of one DS being much much brighter than his brother (and DD somewhere in the middle).

Try to see it as a positive thing. There's no one size fits all for parenting even if your kids seem superficially similar - this way you've got no chance of trying to treat them the same!

Yes DS has ASD but is in MS doing well. DD is six years younger and can often be found helping him with his homework.

Hard to explain without sounding smug or disrespectful to DS but it kind of feels like all the bits that I felt i had been robbed of with DS (star of the week / awards etc) I have got back two fold with DD.

I think I am heading this way.

DD1 (7.0) has SN, very spiky profile, goes to SS, fantastic memory for some things, but in the very early stages of reading, just starting to write some letters etc.

DD2 (5.3) is doing well in academic terms. She's starting to read more fluently, meeting expectations. We are suspecting a problem with language/social communication and have an initial Pead appointment in January.

DD3 (3.7) seems to be steaming ahead. She can draw people with full features and facial expression. Physically she's extremely coordinated. Her language is accurate, with good grammar, expression, etc. People comment on how bright she is and someone who used to work in nurseries has said she's 'special', although I take that with a pinch of salt.

deaf, wow...ditto
and lougle, it certainly makes you throw away the rule book/development book dunnit
hi OJ good to see ya! tumble and needing, i just read your posts nodding sagely...
we are not alone it appears!!
the current "bee in my bonnet" is that ds1 (aspie and massively dyslexic) is so knocked by high school that he only does scouts outside school. ds2 however has every night except one full of extra curricular stuff, clubs, swimming/music lessons, and matches on Saturday and Sunday. the difference is ridiculous. it feels like we're not giving them equal treatment at all.

i didn't say knocked. i said KNACKERED but the spellchecker doesn't like it

Have allsorts here too but thankfully only the youngest two in school now. 1 with dyspraxia and ADD, two gifted (one exceptionally so) two with autism in school. Ds in independent specialist school where we celebrate him managing a bus or a shop (has 8 GCSE's regardless) and dd who apparently is exceptionally able although I'm less excited having knowledge of ds's difficulties.
We roll with the punches and celebrate every achievement no matter what as ds3 managing a bus took far more effort for him than ds2's A's and A*'S at A2.

Hello Shrek! How are you doing?

Proper bonkers, mrsS.

I suspect that may be genetic, too.