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Opinions please..

18 replies

jampots · 01/04/2006 22:17

I chose not to post this incident this morning as I was all whiney and v cross about it so purely on a non-whinging basis, what would you do?

DD's friend (both aged 13) wanted to meet dd in town this morning at 10am as she had to be out of hte house by then. DD was already meeting another friend at 12.30 in town which IMO was a more realistic (after jobs done) time. Anyway I said no town before about 11.30 but as her friend had to go out she could come over to ours and they could go on later. So friend came at 10. From 10.30 dd was whining and nagging to go into town quietly prompted by her friend. She still needed to do stuff like tidy her room, clean her rabbit out etc so we ended up in an argument whereupon she decided it would be a good idea to cut her school tie up as "its one less thing on the floor" (!)anyway she only got as far as cutting it in 2 before she lost her nerve. So despite feeling absolute rage inside I kept my cool and decided she wouldnt be going in at all. Dh decided she could and even told her she could come back later than initially planned. I am soo cross with him too but he cant see a huge problem. He sees the tie cutting as purely monetary and thinks five or six quid on a tie isnt a huge deal. For me its rather more symbolic and is a blatant "Fuck you".

Anyway, should I make her wear her brothers (burgundy) spare tie on Monday and send a note into school. Her own school colour is green.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
jampots · 01/04/2006 22:17

and has anyone got a spare room I can live in?

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Hattie05 · 01/04/2006 22:19

No i'd send her without a tie until you get her a new one. With a note explaining why she doesn't have a tie.

I think sending a different colour one is worse for her and she may get picked on a bit.

Hattie05 · 01/04/2006 22:20

And no i don't have a spare room Smile I need a spare one for the baby to be!

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PinkTulips · 01/04/2006 22:20

speaking as someone who was a teen not so long ago, it is a blatant fuck you and your dh should have had the sense to back you up. the friend sounds like a right piece of work though! why did she have to be out of her own house so early? as for what tie, i'd send her with none and a note explaining exactly what she did!

BadHair · 01/04/2006 22:21

Yes to wearing brother's tie, and possibly his pants and vest as well. On PE day.
I'd be p'd off too, but more with dh than dd as he'd undermined you.
Hope tomorrow's a better day.

nutcracker · 01/04/2006 22:23

I would send her without her any tie and send a note to explain why.

JanH · 01/04/2006 22:25

Oh god, jampots, DH used to undermine me like that, it always made me want to SCREEEEEEAM.

No tie on Monday, note to explain and encourage school to apply their own discipline, and new tie to be paid for by DD. And discourage friendship with nagger.

And we thought it was hard having toddlers!

jampots · 01/04/2006 22:26

I would welcome babyhood/toddlerhood with open arms right now (although not with a new baby) Grin

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edam · 01/04/2006 22:27

Are you going to have this out with dh? Because I think that's the most important thing here, that he's undermining you (and getting to be Mr Nice Guy while making you take all the responsibility/blame).

Send her with no tie, btw.

Hattie05 · 01/04/2006 22:28

You could always sew the tie back together for her patchwork style and make her wear that Wink. If any bits are missing just add any old scraps of material you have lying around.

Aww thats wicked isn't it.

Saggarmakersbottomknocker · 01/04/2006 22:29

Send her without a tie on Monday and she has to pay for a new one.

Dh undermining you is bad - she'll see it for what it is and she'll play you off against each other.

jampots · 01/04/2006 22:30

Hattie - I was thinking of doing that actually but with really crap white thread and BIG stitches so make it really obvious.

Her friend is, on the surface, a nice enough girl but I find dd so edgy and argumentative when she's with her. She has also taken to blaspheming quite a bit eg "Jeeesssus" which I cant bear

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JoolsToo · 01/04/2006 22:31

agree with JanH and edam and would also ground dd from another outing and say 'just because your father is a soft touch doesn't mean I am so don't make any plans for this Saturday'

kid · 01/04/2006 22:32

I would sew her tie back together (really badly) and send a note expaining why she was wearing the tie like that.

JoolsToo · 01/04/2006 22:32

sew it back together for her? are you mad - make HER sew it back together,under your supervision.

jampots · 01/04/2006 22:33

This is the funny bit - when she was out with her pal, dh realised that she hadnt finished cleaning her rabbit out so decided he was grounding her for A MONTH!!!!! for not cleaning the rabbit - I live in a MADHOUSE!!!

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JoolsToo · 01/04/2006 22:34

jampots! don't you DARE sew that tie back together for her - she's old enough to do it herself, make HER do it! (or I'll ground YOU! Grin)

kid · 01/04/2006 22:35

You think thats bad, when my nephew is naughty he gets his laptop conviscated - he isn't allowed it until the 25th May at the moment. Grin

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