Still feeding to sleep at 11 months. Help!

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I'm not sure how we've managed to get this far without any other tricks up our sleeves but DD1 (DC3) will only go to sleep at night or for naps after a breastfeed. She's more or less sleeping through the night, but this evening was woken by the boys (refusing to) go to bed and I tried patting, shushing, rocking, singing, and leaving her to cry it out fur 5 minutes before I eventually caved and fed her back to sleep. Given that she'd only been in bed an hour and a half, and fed then, it's obviously a sleep cue rather than hunger.

So what do I do? It's nearly time to stop breastfeeding anyway, she's getting a but bitey! And she's often very distracted during a feed, crawling off with a cheeky giggle and coming back when she feels like it! I think we did controlled crying with the boys, but my DH works shifts and I can't face it on my own with the older DC to see to as well.

Any ideas?

Is there any reason why you can't just keep feeding her to sleep until she stops needing it in her own time?

Just that I'd like to not be the only one who can settle her. And I'm going back to work soon so she'll have to have naps without me there to feed her to sleep.

She will nap and settle for other people and you can keep feeding. I had the same with ds - not a problem. In fact he settled better for other people

hmm, my DD2 is just a year old now and still feeding to sleep.

Does she take a bottle? When she's 1 this could even be cows' milk to save you the faff of expressing... (supply/demand withstanding)

By the way, that was "hmm" as in me trying to think of a suggestion, not a sideways looking MN kind of hmm!

Thanks for the replies. She's had a bottle, but never seems to really glug it back, just messes around with it really. DS2 was the same, hardly drank any milk after I stopped feeding him at about 1. DS1 was mad for bottles and had one at bedtime til he was 2.6.
I was hoping for an overnight babysit for my birthday in two weeks, looks like it might have to just be a early night!
I'm not really sure HOW to get her taking a bottle, just keep offering instead of a feed?

If you find out the answer to that one, do let me know!

Sorry my DS still feeds to sleep most of the time and he's 19 months :o

I stopped feeding DC1 to sleep for her naps only. I used to pat head, sing twinkle twinkle, shush and sit next to the cot with my hand through the bars for her to hold. She howled for ages the first day, then less and less each day for about three days, when she settled straight down. Then I stopped the bedtime feeds a couple of weeks later.

DC2 had bottles when I was at work, so when I eventually stopped feeding him he just had a bottle (which I know is not ideal, and I will sort it out soon, promise).

Have you ever tried getting someone else to settle her? My DC all fed to sleep for ages (DS2 and DD would still sometimes feed to sleep at the age of two) but left with someone else (DH/grandparent/other family member) would settle down fine .
Might be worth trying her with someone else for an evening? You could maybe go out for the night for your birthday just not overnight

My experience is the same as Librarians with both my DCs. Screamed blue murder for feeding to sleep if it was me, but settled just fine without feeding for other people.

With DC1 we waited until we had a bank holiday weekend and did controlled crying, sorted it in two nights.

DC2 is 12mo and still feeds to sleep most of the time, but not always. Best non-feed way if getting him to sleep is to bring buggy into the house and rock him in it. Once properly asleep he can be transferred. Not ideal but it works and has enabled some evenings out.

Excellent, I have a solution! Will leave her in the capable hands of DH and a bottle of full-fat cow's milk!
It's laziness really, it's just so much easier to feed her back to sleep as it's such a sure-fire way of keeping it short. Is suppose I need to either stick with that (but 2 years old LMNL, wow!) or try something else and stick with it til it works. Thanks for the advice you lot.

YY. Whatever you decide to do, stick with it. These things usually only take a few days to sort out IME. Good luck!

You could give her a beaker with a straw instead? My BF dd drinks this way - haven't bothered with bottles. She got the idea very quickly!

I think you need to separate two things - how to get her to sleep when you're there, and how to get her to sleep when you're not there.

She knows you can BF her and that's what she wants from you.

DS always fed to sleep. Like you, I was wondering how I was ever going to get a night off!

But then when I had to be out late and DP put him to bed, it worked fine, I was

She may not even need a bottle from your DH, my DP gets DS to sleep by shushing. Don't forget BFing is also about comfort, and it may be that this is what she's looking for from you at night, not nutrition / food necessarily. Your DH will have other ways of giving her comfort. It might well be a bottle of milk, but equally what works for them might be cuddling / rocking / some other sleep-inducing activity.

I wonder if it might help to stop thinking of this as a problem that you need to solve before DH has a go, and instead hand over the reins to DH now, and let him and DD need to find out what works between them on a night where you're not there. She's old enough to understand that there's a difference between you and DH as entities.

You don't need to stop feeding to sleep at all, when you're putting her to bed, unless you actually want to. It's not lazy! It's immensely beneficial for both of you :)

It's possibly much easier for her to find a new way with DH than change the habit which she already has and loves with you.

About the biting. It's not the end (unless you want it to be for other reasons).

If you make sure you consistently remove her from the breast, instantly, every time she does it, and end the feed, she'll soon stop.

Took us about 3 weeks to nip it in the bud (no pun intended - ouch!) I think.

Am just winding down BFing now btw. DS is 3.8! I never intended to feed for so long, I really didn't give it much thought. If you'd told me I'd feed for so long before I got pregnant I wold have said no way! But it's just kind of happened that way. DS has never showed any signs of wanting to give up, so we just continued. It's always felt like a really natural thing to do, and seeing as it's so good for both of us, I never had the heart to just stop it. (These days, it's only at night if I do bedtime, mornings and if he's ill).

It really is becoming time to end now however as I'm pregnant and feeding is hurting my nipples, ouch!

Sounds like a plan :)
No wow about still nursing to sleep BTW :) it jsut happened that way, DS2 self weaned at jsut over 4 and DD is now 3.6 and still going - if you'd told me that I would end up nursing past two and tandem nursing for over 2 years I would have given you a look. However, it just happened. As long as youa are happy with how things are and it's working for you I wouldn't worry too much.
you might find a local BF group, like LLL for rxample, might be worth going to as you will lezet lots of other mums in the same position