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Feel like a failure

4 replies

dribbleface · 26/08/2012 20:26

DS1 is a bright, funny, well behaved (for everyone else) little boy of 4 years, but he is underweight and had fallen through the centiles and is now having blood tests as noted as a failure to thrive. Sad

I try to make sure he eats enough, but he has never bothered about food much. He was ill on and off for 2 years (mild but constant). He has asthma, allergies.

I feel like such a failure, why can't I keep him well, healthy and plump! DS2 is on the other hand a little hog and as strong as an ox. I guess I feel guilty as had post natal depression with DS1, but I do strongly believe having him ill/on antibiotic or fighting for my crap GP to recognise he was having breathing issues. Changed GP in the end.

Feeling sad and fed up about it all. Doesn't help that the whole household had had D & V this week and DS2 is teething and miserable.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
racingheart · 26/08/2012 23:36

Oh you're not a failure. You pestered the GP, despite having PND, and even changed GP so you could get him the help he needed. That's very far from being a failure. That's success beyond measure.

You have lots of sympathy here. I could have written your post when DS2 was your son's age. He was very sickly, very underweight, diagnosed with FTT (such a hideous term for undiagnosed eating problems!) along with a host of other pretty grim illnesses.

You ARE keeping him healthy - as healthy as he can be, for now. He may not be plump but he has you looking out for him and making sure the medics don't dismiss him. You will look back one day and see what you are doing from a distance and feel proud. I do, now that my son is really healthy and strapping, with a massive appetite.

Here's what I did with DS 2, in case it helps:

Made a list of all the food he seemed to genuinely like, and checked there was something from each main category (carbs, protein, fruit and veg.)

Gave him the highest calorie favourite foods as often as possible and the lowest calorie ones in between. (So he ate lots more bananas than cucumber, for example!)

I stopped worrying at all if he didn't have variety, so long as he ate from each food group. He lived on the exact same 5 items in his packed lunch without any variation for five years before asking for a change. He suddenly got bored and became more adventurous.

I did all the things you're not supposed to do, as it encourages bad habits - I'd let him graze while watching tv, or playing a game. Looking back, I think it was absolutely necessary as he had sever FTT and was off the centiles.

When he didn't eat, I oculdn't eat. We were all skinny and barking. I had to learn to eat with real visible pleasure in front of him, even if he refused to. So we did a lot of baking cakes (with loads of eggs and milk and almond flour in, to build him up). I got fat and he eventually got plumper!

It took a long, long time.

Take worry and coaxing out of the equation if you can. As long as he has high calorie bites from each food group a few times a day, he'll live. In time, I bet you, he'll thrive.

dribbleface · 27/08/2012 14:40

racingheart Thank you so much for the reply and your kind words. Having a bit of a wobble last night (never google FTT!).

I have done as you suggested and started making a list of the food he eats from the food groups. He does eat a fair variety, its just volume we struggle with.

DH and I are at odds, I have tried the limit snacking route and its made no difference and so I am happy to go with grazing (as long as its healthy). DH is not.

Today he's had a slice of plain bread, a banana, an apple (fun size), some baked beans, some cheese, 2 mini sausages............so good today. It's a roast dinner tonight so I know he will eat potatoes, carrots, yorkshire pudding and chicken. If you looked at today in isolation, you would think he ate well!

Blood test tomorrow (gulp!), maybe they might show something up?

Thanks again

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dribbleface · 30/08/2012 11:39

Quick update, all bloods came back clear Grin

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coolragdoll · 31/08/2012 02:11

It sounds like you're doing really well- my daughter is 14 and is happy to have the identical lunch box every day- sandwich, crisps, cheese string etc- she won't eat any fruit- but I think trying to stay calm, allow grazing and not obsess over every mouthful is excellent advice. Good luck

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