Someone tell me again that it will pass and get better

[raininginbaltimore]

12 day old baby. Will only sleep if touching me. So co-sleeping. Well I say sleeping, she is very unsettled after 11pm. Took me til 12.30 to settle her so I was bent like a contortionist around her. Awake at 2am, 1hr 40mins to feed and settle the little grunting madam then feeding again at 4am.

So I have had 1hr 30min sleep. I have done my neck in co-sleeping. I am anxious about co-sleeping cos I am ff and knackered and on medication. But I don't know what else to do.

I think having another baby was a terrible idea.

It will pass and get better. Promise. I have been through that interminable feeling stage with all three of mine. Any chance (I hesitate to ask this because I know she's not your first) of catching up on some kip during the day?

On dd3 (5 days old) myself, and I think getting "this too shall pass" tattooed on my foot might help not just to remind us that the sleep deprivation stage foes go, though it is hell, but also that they will only be this little, with the head that smells of small baby and making whiffly, grunty noises as they snuggle into your chest to sleep that too shall pass...

I know (as witnessed by the fact I am writing this on my phone at 4am) that the not sleeping is hard, I'm trying to focus on the second bit. I find it helps. As does tea ;)

It will pass. My second baby would only sleep on his front on my chest for his first few weeks, so I couldn't even lie down at night, but slept (fitfully) propped up on pillows. And little babies need lots of breastfeeding. It's so, so difficult.

Are you allowed Ibuprofen for your poor neck? I can't remember if you can take that when breastfeeding. If not, paracetamol is ok.

Any chance of catching up on sleep during the day? Is there anyone there to help with your other child?

it will pass ! this is 4th night of 5, 3 and 1 year old all sleeping in own beds, only took 5 years !

Thanks. Feels slightly better when it is daylight. 4am is very lonely.

I am allergic to ibuprofen, but not breastfeeding because of other medication I have to take.

DH has taken the toddler out so I can catch up on sleep.

I think it is the Chinese torture of it, and he falls asleep, I start to get comfy, but then she starts griping. I don't really understand - during day she is pretty content and will sleep anywhere for up to three hours at a time.

Sounds very familiar, raining. And yes, it is like torture. Sometimes I found that I couldn't get back to sleep because I was waiting for DS1 to wake up again and it was such hell to be dragged back from the brink of sleep. I took DS2 to an osteopath who specialised in children (only discovered after going through the sleepness-night hell with DS1 that this can help with sleep). She said their cranial bones can get misaligned during birth and this can affect their sleep. No idea, actually, if it helped or not, but I was determined to do everything I could to avoid difficult nights. It did seem easier with DS2 somehow, apart from his initial refusing-to-sleep-anywhere-but-on-me thingy.

Might be worth trying the osteopath if you have one nearby and can afford it. We only did one session with DS2.

I hope you are sleeping well now. You are doing the right thing in making sleep your priority. And you will get through this...

And I agree, being up in the night on your own with a baby can be the loneliest feeling in the world.

it will pass. And sooner than you think, though of course you'll live every second of that time! Get pillows galore to get in as comfy as position as you can, and I second the idea of cranial osteopath. I was highly sceptical but it really did seem to work on DD1.

We did it with ds as he was forceps. But generally she is very chilled in day, sleeps etc. But at night she is restless.

Do you think she might have day/night mixed up?

Yeah probably, but they don't have much concept of it when little I suppose.

Don't know how you swap them round, I always thought you just had to wait until they are older and generally more alert.

But yes she zonks out in day, sleeps happily sleeping for 3 hours at a time.

Oh yes, I'd forgotten the day and night muddle that little babies seem to be born into. That will sort itself out, but you have to suffer for it whilst they are learning!