How can I get my 7mo to go/stay asleep??? very tired mummy alert!

[tinky19]

DD has never been very good at sleeping. 4 hrs at a time max but its getting worse! Now she wont even go to sleep!

We have bath, bottle, bed routine. DS goes to have story with dh and i bf dd/ rock basically do what ever i can to get her to go to sleep but without fail she's awake 30mins later, screaming the place down snd simply refuses to go to sleep! None of the bf/ singing/ rocking works. I've even left her as part of controllled crying but that was a total disaster. (i did cc with ds at 14mo which worked in a matter of days but i think shes too young.)

I spend all evening either running up and down stairs (if she does happen to drop off again its only for about 10/15 mins) or, like tonight i bring her back down stairs and bf/ cuddle her for the rest of the evening and feel like a massive failure.

9 times out of 10 she ends up co sleeping with us.

What can i do???
ideas, please

What time is bedtime? How are her naps?

11am ish nap - 30 mins
2pm ish - 30 mins
4pm ish - 30 mins

6.30 bath
6.45-7pm bottles
Asleep usually between 7.30 and 8pm
Awake by 8 - 8,30pm.

Sounds like she's overtired so hard to settle? My oldest was like this. Second one is better as I realise she needs an earlier bedtime plus tweak the naps. Can you try for a nap 2 hours after waking? Then another 2-3 hours after waking from last one? Depending on length, a third power nap then bedtime is 2 hours afterwards (as in lights out, not start of bedtime).

My DD is 7 months and has two long naps. She always needs one at 8.30am (she wakes at 6.30ish). Second nap is around 12.30. Before she was doing three short naps and would be miserable and needed bedtime by half 6. I tweaked her naps and over time she started going longer. Took about a week?

thank you.
Will try concerted effort tommorrow. long walks maybe to get her to sleep during the day.
I keep feeling like we're 'missing' bedtime by trying to do bath time with ds.

My kids went through phases like this, my son was dreadful, and it always got worse when they were teething - we always relied on calpol then!
Some tricks we used were, settling them to sleep using music (the Rainbow Collection Lullaby is not too irritating) I started using it in the car as they went to sleep and then introduced it at bedtime, then as they woke in the night.
I am sure you are aware of sleep cycles, but it's handy to know that a cycle lasts about 40 minutes, so sometimes it's worth leaving them a little if they wake 40 minutes after going to sleep to see if they can self sooth themselves.

I agree with the longer naps thingie, ds3 is 8 months and wakes at 7am, he then goes for a nap at 9am for at least an hour, he will have another long nap at 1pm 1-2 hours and then bed at 6pm.

If he wakes in the night we have a white noise cd that we stick on, it soon soothes him back to sleep. He is bf and often will wake around 3am and I just give him a quick feed then as I am worried about the white noise waking everyone else up!

I know what you mean about bedtime with the older one. I gave up in the end as DD would get too tired waiting up with her older brother. So we have a bath at 6pm with DS (just a quick dunk), DD goes up for a feed then asleep by half 6. DH does DS's bedtime usually and I join in once DD is asleep.

Ok, so we had longer naps today. Bath at 6pm, bottle, singing etc. Sound asleep at 7pm.

WIDE AWAKE AT 7.40pm
Half an hour rocking/ bf/ singing

DD is now rolling round on the living room floor and I'm going to cry.

Tinky19 I feel your pain. 9.29pm and my 8-month-old is still shouting in her cot.

oh no, so sorry for you - that's the worst, when you think that's it for the night and then its not. Can only offer you a suggestion that my friend did which was to just allow her baby to stay up! Not tired, fine, just potter about with toys etc, parents got on with dinner, TV etc, interacted as little as possible and she eventually would flake out about nine and they'd take her to bed. Personally I think its sounds bonkers BUT my two have always gone at 7pm with no real bother so I refuse to don the judgy pants! Plus side was she'd sleep til 8-9am! None of this 5.30-6am wake up mine do! Best of luck

Sorry it didn't work :( I'd give it a week to see how it goes and keep her in her room if she does wake - maybe stick a light show on or something?

Thanks trixie, that's sort of what we keep end up doing anyway just with bath bottle bed routine first.

She finally fell asleep at 10.30pm (in my arms) and I managed to get her into her cot without waking. She woke up at 4am and I bought her into bed with us where she slept till 8am.

iggly I wish I could leave her in her room but unless I'm in there she screams her head off (even if dh stays with her) and that disturbs ds!!
I sometimes sit upstairs with her but after an hour of hoping she'll drop off I'm on my knees and wanting some me time just want to watch corrie

Do you put baby down asleep or awake? Once I started putting mine down awake nd allowed her yo learn to self style he went from hourly wakings to 7am-7pm.

Sorry that should read self settle.

www.amazon.co.uk/Solve-Your-Childs-Sleep-Problems/dp/0863181228
good book

she has to go down asleep. She screams when i put her into her cot awake!

I would suggest BF to sleep & co-sleeping. Best for me (and baby likes it too) as I get the most possible sleep.

Do you leave her when she stirs? It might be that she just needs to be left to settle herself and have a fidget, grizzle and go back to sleep.

hi HipHop So do u manage to put baby down to sleep in the evenings (if so how do you make sure she is safe in your bed) or does she/ he go to sleep on you down stairs and you go to bed together?

She just seems to go from 0 - 100 in seconds valium she wakes up and screams! I'm not rushing in too soon, as ds used to winge but then give in pretty quick so I know that can work. She just gets more and more hysterical.

Theres the problem. I use do put my baby down sound sleep tip toe put the room and pry she would sleep, no such luck woke very hour. I did a mixture of cc with pu/pd and within 10 mins she was asleep by herself.

There was some crying yes but a few mins of crying with 12 hrs sleep compared to crying and waking every hour and 3 hours broken sleep made it worth it. Message me if you want full details on how idid it.

Literally changed everything!

My daughter woke every two hours until she was 10mths - i was like a zombie. Eventually - after trying literally everything - I took her to a cranial osteopath. she had 4 sessions. She slept a little longer after each one and after the fourth - just like magic - a whole uninterupted night. never a problem since. have you tried anything similar? might be worth a go.

Have you tried a radio on low while you are settling her?

Once she became mobile I started putting her down in a cot at bedtime & then when she gets up after I've gone to bed she gets in with me. usually she knows when I get into bed, but now she is 14 months she sleeps in cot for longer periods (occasionally sometimes through to 6am!!).

I also found she would get very agitated and wouldn't go down - one night I put her into the cot and walked out of the room for a few minutes (as I was getting exasperated and needed a breather) and much to my surprise she cried briefly (and loudly) and then fell fast asleep. So she appeared to be wide awake and bouncing off the walls, when actually I think she was overtired and in need of some space.

From then I moved to putting her in cot after BF (if she hadn't fallen asleep) and if she protested I would lie her back down and rub her back until she chilled herself out. usually this works.

I don't have any suggestions for the waking after she goes down though I'm sorry, though with DD1 I used to play a gentle lullaby CD quietly at about this age. Best of luck.

Main thing I would suggest is trying to get her to settle on her own to sleep. Then hopefully rather than screaming each time she wakes she will just get herself back to sleep. Takes time to get there but so worth persisting with and makes life so much easier in the long term. Good luck :)