DD excited to be a flower girl but the wedding's been cancelled.

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DD (4) was asked to be a flower girl for a wedding this Autumn.

She was very excited. When she saw weddings in magazines or on TV she said "Oh look, a flower girl, that's what I'm going to be". She is quite girlie so the lure of the pretty dress and the attention was quite strong.

So, the wedding has been cancelled, for reasons I won't go into :( I haven't broken it to DD yet.

Has anyone had to do this? She doesn't have much concept of time, so it's not like she's been counting down the weeks etc. I wondered if we just stopped mentioning it she would eventually forget.

Any advice gratefully received.

I am currently trying to work out how to break it to my children that we have had to cancel our family holiday this year due to lack of money. They too are very excited.

I think I am going to tell them the bad news, then immediately give them something nice to focus on. I.e. we're not going on holiday, but we are going to have a lovely day trip together.

Could you plan a nice day out for the date of the wedding, and talk about that instead?

You must tell her. She won't forget. Children are like elephants.

I agree with JeanBodel, bad news, good news.

And obviously only explain as much about the reasons for the wedding cancellation as she needs to know.

Bad news then good news is a good idea.

We are (finally!) getting her christened later this year so that will be a day where she will be in a church, in a nice dress, with family around and people paying attention to her!

I can't think of any good way of explaining the reason why the wedding is cancelled. It is a reason that is pretty much beyond the comprehension of a 4 year old. I think I will have to stick with "sometimes people change their minds" until she's at least a few years older.

JeanBodel - sorry for your situation. How old are your children? I'm sure they will be understanding and not give you a hard time.