A cleaner (we have one for 3 hours per week - she irons DH and my work clothes, cleans bathrooms etc, makes the beds, does one deep-clean job per week as well (ie oven, windows etc).
Eat like the French - swap lunch and dinner. DH, I and DD (3 years) all eat our main meal at lunch time (DH and I at work and DD with her nanny - usually a hot meal). DH and I eat a light dinner in evenings, that doesn't involve any or much cooking in the evening (salad, a sandwich, veg sticks and dips, eggs on toast, sometimes even just a bowl of cereal if I've had a working lunch in a restaurant that day).
I don't eat as well as I did when I was a SAHM, but I eat well enough and we all get our five a day. DH and I no longer have nice sit-down meals in the evening, but we do at the weekends, when Sat and Sunday dinners are planned, cooked and enjoyed Jamie Oliver style. DD eats very well so no worries there.
DH and I very fair about sharing all housework and childcare outside of our working hours, to ensure we have equal leisure time. We have a nanny whose job description includes 'nursery duties' - ie cleaning up after DD and doing her laundry, although cleaning and tidying aren't her strongest talents).
Delegate jobs. Have house guests wash their bedding before they leave (we have a lot of visitors). Online shopping. Put up with my and DH's bedroom having a constant washing mountain on the floor / floordrobe. I do not call and email friends and family nearly as much as I should, but when I do I do it in work/lunch time and often write one long newsy email then copy and paste it among friends and family just changing a few key sentences to make it more personal to them.
Just get by really and try to ignore the niggly stuff that isn't done to my idealistic standards. The house was inevitably cleaner and more organized, bills more likely to be paid on time, DH and I had better sit-down evening meals and DD probably had the best childcare when I was a SAHM, but I wasn't terribly happy and fulfilled. I have since returned to work in a new job which is about 45 to 50 hours per week, high-profile, very interesting and I love. DH similarly loves his job, which is about 40 hours per week. I concluded that I / my family simply can't have it all. But what we have is good enough, and we are all happy.