How do I help my DS6 - behavioural problems at school....

[siobhs]

Right. Will try not to waffle too much. Teacher has called me in twice since Thursday to tell me that my DS6 has been playing very roughly both in the yard and at PE. She said herself that she knows there's no malice there but that he is 'overzealous' and could I please have a word with him about it. Apparently this has been going on over the last 2 weeks. I've spoken to him about it - we've (successfully I thought) had a star chart at home for listening, playing nicely etc. Then I get called in today again. It shouldn't be - but I find it so disheartening. He is no angel I know. But he is not a bad kid. He is full of beans, constantly on the go and full of energy. He just doesn't seem to realise the line between energetic play and rough play. How do I teach him? Not my finest parenting admission but when I see teacher beckoning me at pick up time, more than anything I feel embarassed. How sad is it that I want her to know that I am a good parent!! His twin brother is in the same class and has never had any problems...

Any words of wisdom from ye oh so wise mumsnetters would be greatly appreciated.......siobhs

I wish I could...but my kids seemed to have more energy than most too... So, he isn't "bad" just on the go all the time??

How old is he?

You have to have some consequences as well as reward charts. If the teacher calls you again, you tell him, then something dire will happen to him. Treats cancelled, toys removed, hobbies postponed etc. You know him best so you can judge what sanction would impact most.

Exactly mother2many....he is full of energy, non stop chatter and full of enthusiasm for everything. And he isn't "bad" . He just doesn't seem to be able to judge the line between whats acceptable rough play and whats too much. Clawdy, he is 6.

Cogito, his friday treat has been cancelled as a result of this last incident at school.

thk for any feedback girls....much appreciated x

Age six I'd also recommend (if he isn't already) enrolling him in something like Beaver Scouts. They tend to be quite active sessions but there is big emphasis on teamwork and the leaders won't tolerate any bad behaviour.

Sorry, Siobhs thought you meant he was your sixth son. Do you know,he sounds like a boisterous typical little boy who means no harm. One of mine was very similar and I found talking to him seriously and quietly worked well,on the lines of "You know,you really made Sam sad today pushing him like that. And you're usually so kind..." Worth a try.

thanks to everyone who replied1 Thanks especially clawdy - will give your advice a try. Sorry about the age confusion - i didn't phrase that very well, visions of a sixth son are making me smile:)