When to take newborn to bedroom?

[GimmieChocolate]

Hope I'm putting this in the right section...

My DD is 11 days old and my pfb. Obviously at night she sleeps next to my bed in her Moses basket. During the day i have her in the lounge for ease when feeding, playing and she sleeps during the day in lounge in her Moses basket too as I don't think I should need to tip toe around her and she happily sleeps through me hoovering, watching tv, talking to friends etc

At the moment she stays downstairs until I go to bed around 10ish with the normal noise DH and I make during evening, tv, talking etc... I was wondering should I take her back upstairs earlier on in the evening and just keep monitor on me? Will this help with settling her to bed when shes a bit bigger as she'll know its time for the quiet darker room? Or does it make no difference? What does everyone else do?

Thank you in advance!

Personally, I think it will make no difference. But if you fancy a bit of time to yourself, take her up.

I think both my DDs used to come to bed with us at that age but I don't think they should necessarily.

Both mine went at about 3 months I think as they started to sleep a little bit longer and I wanted to get them in a routine

Yes, both ours started sleeping upstairs in the evenings when they were about three months old (after the cluster-feeding evenings).

Another vote for getting going on a bath/bed evening ritual and having a couple of hours to yourself. PS... unless you live in a castle you probably don't need a monitor.

Remember, SIDS guidelines say baby should sleep in the same room as you until at least 6 months.

I kept DD downstairs with us until about 12/13 weeks, when the noise started to disturb her a bit. Keeping her with you now is for the best :)

We started putting our dd to bed upstairs when we realised that moving her upstairs when we went to bed would wake her up - think it was probably around 8 weeks when she started to fall into a pattern of beginning to have a big long sleep from 8 ish onwards, so we followed her lead and built the evening routine around that.

We did 7pm bath bottle swaddle into moses basket in the living room from week 2, then did a dream feed at 11pm when we went to bed. From about 4 weeks we put the moses basket in the bedroom from 7pm and still did the 11pm dreamfeed.

I like it. We have a few hours of us time and dd gets into a nice bedtime routine.

When we go on holiday, we settle dd into her buggy at 7pm if we are out and she sleeps in there until we get bqck to the hotel where we put her down.

Dd is now 6mo.

What ItsAllGoingToBeFine says.

The advice for them to sleep in the room with you until 6mo isn't so you hear them, but so they hear you - babies use hearing you breathe to help them regulate theirs. A monitor doesn't allow for this to happen.

Have you all remained in the same room for each amd every nap for 6mo? I would never get dishes done...have showers....strip the beds etc if I had to do this?

I waited til 7 months which is clearly madness, so don't do that! She goes up about 8 now (with sensor pad monitor thing as I'm a paranoid wreck!). When/if I have another I'll definitely try to get a decent bedtime routine earlier, dd is shit at sleeping which is probably my fault! That said, while it's nice to get a few hours to yourself in the evening, there's nothing like snuggling on the sofa with a sleeping baby :)

Yes gnocchi! Like I say though, madness, and no nothing ever got done!

My two nap in the living room (well DD did until 9mo, DS does at 7wo) and I'm generally in there with him. I might pop for a wee or grab a sandwich, but that's it.

I'd not leave him (or any under 6mo) for more than twos couple of minutes, certainly not for a couple of hours. Then again, he very rarely sleeps anywhere other than on a person so it's nigh on impossible to not follow the guideline in our house ATM! Put him down, he wakes up.

It's about risk management and deciding which guidelines you are and aren't going to follow, I was simply explaining why the guideline is for babies to stay in the room until 6mo as many people assume its so the parent hears the baby.

We kept DD with us downstairs until we started to think about getting her into a bit of a routine at a couple of weeks old. We would bath/feed in nursery then put moses basket in cot (also helped her settle in cot as it was not such a new thing when she went in it at 8 weeks). We also had that sensor pad which was great for peace of mind. DH used to dream feed her at 10.30/11pm ish and then bring her through and put moses basket in our room where she would spend the rest of the night.

Currently pregnant with number 2 and would probably not keep baby in with us for 8 weeks this time but we will see.

Thank you all for your replies. We will probably just keep her with us I lounge until we start a routine in next couple weeks. Once she's asleep she's out of it so when we take her upstairs she doesn't stir. I'm a bit confused about daytime sleeping though. She will sleep and I'll do a couple chores around house, dry my hair/do make up etc and just have the monitor with me. Surely it's unrealistic to be glued to her constantly??

Op I potter while dd naps in the daytime and always have. The idea being that babies need noise to not fall into a deep sleep but if im pottering then the tv or radio is on, dishes clattering etc. I didnt even use a monitor as I could hear her cry anywhere in my house except the shower which is the only time I use the monitor. Dd is in her own room at 6mo and we dont use the baby monitor at all

We made the change at a couple of days before seven weeks. In the very early weeks he would happily sleep in the moses basket, but after 3 weeks he refused to which made our evenings very very difficult for a month. So for the last week it has been bath, feed in the bedroom and then put to sleep in the crib by 8pm latest. I then spend the next two hours with my eyes glued to the video monitor!

"Surely it's unrealistic to be glued to her constantly??"

Of course it is. Put her down for a nap and then get on with things until she wakes up. That's how most people do it.

You have to decide for yourself which guidelines you can realistically maintain. For example, I never gave DD a dummy because I didn't want to risk our BFing relationship but she's only slept on her own possibly about 20 times if that in her entire life. I go to bed with her at 8pm and it's only a handful of times I go back downstairs when I really feel I need the break. Actually 20 times is probably even an exaggeration. However, my DH does loads in the house and she's been content to lie on the floor and play on her own from an early age. She turns 6 months soon and if her night wakings are still the same, I might continue to go to bed at 8pm as I've found I get a decent block of sleep that way before her first wake. I realise though that most parents don't want to do this but it works for us. Oh and even though DH does a lot, our house is still a tip and has been since the day she was born, every choice comes with a price

I started putting ds up in the bedroom about 6 weeks with his angel care monitor on. Gave us some time to chill out and just be us not just mummy and daddy. He is 18 weeks and goes up every night at 7 it's great having some time alone.

Ds (PFB) napped on me so stayed with me. Dd mapped in the sling as I couldn't be doing with working out a routine while chasing a 2 year old. Chores happens when they're awake. Naps are for us all to rest

OP your baby is very young so every chance that a bedtime routine might not work but I do think putting them somewhere dark etc helps. Dd got I to a bedtime routine a lot faster than ds and I put it down to that. However it meant a lot of my time was spent with her of an evening - as she got older, keeping her with us didnt work as she would be very tired and grumpy! But equally grumpy if I tried putting her down...! Wasn't until 4-5 months that I had an evening again really.

We put dd1 upstairs to sleep in the evenings from a few weeks old and were very keen on setting up routines. The other two I fed downstairs and pretty much stayed with them on me during the evening for the early weeks. Both of them hit a point around three months where they didn't settle to sleep in the evening with living room distractions at which point I would take them upstairs. They were very clear with what they needed and wanted. Perhaps yours will be too.

Just to reiterate, it's not about whether you can hear your baby cry, it is about whether your baby can hear you.

What Its said - monitors do not reduce the SIDS risk by one iota. They are so you can hear your baby if it wakes and cries. They have no impact on SIDS.