right, so i have got so fed up i have banned all screen time ....

[lu9months]

DS1 and 2 are driving me up the wall with their bickering and winding each other up. normal consequences/ignoring not working, things getting worse and worse. i have (possibly shot myself in the foot) and said they have lost all screen time and have to earn it back . now no idea how to monitor this: maybe 'if you dont argue for half an hour you earn 10 mins of screen time' or similar? but i will need a chart for each child wont i?? anyone got any experience of making this work? help!

How old are they? It can't be that long until bedtime can it?

It's bloody hot, it's not surprising they are bickering and winding each other up... can you send them up to the bath early?

Keep it simple. Split the chart into 15min or half hour slots (15 for 8 and under, 30 for older or I would keep it at 15 if they are either side of the ages). For every 15 minutes you are good (no fighting, messing around etc) you get a sticker on the chart. Decide in your own mind which behaviours would count as no sticker and what amount of naughtiness is ok.

If you get x amounts of stickers you get half an hour of TV.

Is this going to be for every day after school and weekends? Or just a couple of days? It is difficult to monitor so after a while you might want to change it to 'every time you argue you lose 20 minutes'.

they are 9 and 7, and they are always a bit like this, but have been really bad for the whole week, so i have just about reached the end of my tether! i have tried ignoring them, imposing early bedtimes, pleading with them and just shouting, but they are driving me mad!! so i have brought out the big guns, but now not sure how to use them!!

thanks wellthen, i agree taking time away is simpler, but i was sort of hoping to make it a positive reward for good behaviour, rather than a negative consequence for bad, since i feel i am continually being negative. thanks for the ideas though, sounds like it might be workable

Mine get a 2 weeks screen ban when they drive me mad. Only happened twice so far, both times with DS only (the older one). DD is 5. Remote controls get taken away, so that 'monitoring' is easier. It is possible but seriously difficult to get our TV working without remotes. Password gets changed on the computer. It worked really well for me. It is negative, as you say, but it helps me to get over the crisis and continue to be a committed parent.

It did modify DS's behavior too, although yes I believe there might be other, more positive ways to achieve the same thing. The problem is at times like this I have little energy or motivation to invest in the 'right, most effective way'. So I go with the one that works.

Can't you just say...no real arguing for a week and then we'll try it for an hour a day, no arguing for two weeks and then go back to normal? Instead of earning it back in increments, which sounds messy and annoying for you (having to note it down).