Is this the right thing to do wrt food?

[slatternlymother]

DS is 19mo and is quite a light eater; not picky at all, just low birth weight so never ate much.

At mealtimes, he feeds himself and often doesn't finish. I don't force the issue, and just leave him to it. At weekends, he gets pudding after dinner regardless of whether he finishes; I just expect him to try it. He doesn't often finish the pudding either (mummy helps!)

But am I doing the right thing? My friend seemed shocked I offered him pudding when he hadn't cleared his plate; but if I didn't, he would literally never get pudding. What do you think?

I think it's fine

Pudding should never be seen as a reward. I think you're doing the right thing.

thats what i always did and neither of mine have any issues with food other than being picky little sods....

i think what you are doing is fine. dont make an issue of it and continue what you are doing imo!

I think it's just fine - perfect in fact. It's only at the weekends and it's not like he's eating any less in anticipation of getting pudding instead is it?

It takes quite a lot to 'unlearn' the ways you were brought up yourself though, so unless she has given it a lot of thought, it was just a knee jerk reaction. I wouldn't put any weight in her comment.

If you can keep doing what you are doing you will be doing really well. Raising a child/adult with a healthy relationship with food is no easy feat!

thank you everyone

No, I'm pretty sure he doesn't eat less in anticipation of dessert as often hell eat about half and then offer it to me or DH

As a child, I HAD to clear my plate (and the portions were the same as my parents) or I'd not get pudding. I don't blame them; it was learned behaviour from their parents. But it's a wonder I didn't get into adulthood without serious weight gain! The food wasn't unhealthy; just a LOT of it.

Sounds like your doing it fine and giving your child the right messages about food. Your friend seems to think sweet things are a reward. That's not a good message.

My DD is also a light eater (but also picky). HV reassured me re puddings by saying it gives them a second opportunity to eat.