What's life like after the second baby?

[bunyanvillas]

Have a 13 month old daughter and just about to return to work 3 days a week. Am tentatively wondering about having another baby at some point over the next couple of years but not sure if we can afford it! Basically I have to work as we cannot live on one salary alone. How do people cope with 2 young children and the nursery bills and demands on time? I guess it's simply a case of serious budgeting and a military routine in the mornings? I'm sure it would be tough but of course the benefits of having two lovely kiddies would outweigh everything else! I'd be interested to hear of other people's experiences.

When I had my second I went part time to 2 days per week. Dh was unable to help with dropping off and picking up form the childminder so it was a nightmare.

A second one is more than twice as hard.... but worth it!

I think a bigger age gap is easier than a smaller one with two. For one thing, you'll need full-day nursery for less time, as the older one will be closer to school age. And the older one can help with the little one.

My two are three years apart, which works well for us. I don't work outside the home, though, so I don't know about mornings really.

Second one just fitted in. I enjoyed him so much more because I was more confident as a mother.

Financially it is harder - this is where age gaps come into play. If it's a serious issue, then perhaps leaving your second until the oldest is in school would be a prudent approach?

i have 23 months between mine and its bloody hard!! totally different temperaments.

I didn';t goi back to work after my 2nd. figured that i would only be working to pay child care so wouldn't see the money anyway.

Routine wise, well, 2nd doesn't have one which is handy for my eldest as we get to carry on all his things, just means that sometimes ds2 is grouchy sometimes lovely.

I have to be really organised and plan ahead more now, prob just me, i am still not coping very well being a mum of two

knackering.

but love having two.

honestly? it's knackering. we cannot afford nursery for even one, much less two, so one of us works fulltime and the other part time at alternate times.

ours are 2.5 years apart. i'd agree w/NQC that a bigger age gap is easier to manage.

I agree that it makes financial sense to wait until the first child is school-age - but as I'm going to be 38 this year I don't have a huge amount of time left! Absolutely LOVE being a mum but already feeling guilty at the prospect of leaving dd (13 months) in nursery 3 days a week as of next week, so heaven only knows how I'd feel leaving a second baby in nursery (that's assuming we can afford it, hahaha!!). Still, if we can get through a few tough and financially tight years, I'm sure it'll be more than worth it.

Expat, we have the same working problem. WISH I could just work 9-5 but am doing weird shifts for the foreseeable (until both at school prob)

agree def easier with bigger age gap my 2 are nearly 4yrs apart but baby no2 did just slot in, ds was at nursery in mornings, then again i'm a sahm so maybe is easier? if i had been working maybe find it tougher with nursery/childminding fees

F*ing hard!! I have 20 months in between mine and therefor ds1 is still much like a baby himself(i mean emotionally/behaviour) . Now ds1 has hit 2 its like caring for a volcano and a tornado!! one thats happy to sit and watch, then all of a sudden errupts in seconds......the other whome just leaves a path of caos and distruction behind him wherever he is..... I wouldnt recommended small age gaps-or at least not this small lol