Having to scrap having a birthday party :-(

[Smurfy1]

Kids are doooo cruel

DSD 10 has never had a party so was really excited cos we were going to throw her 1, so she starts asking people in her class and they all said no we won't go so you'll be all alone with no-one there so she doesnt want 1 now :-( she has just started there at the school in Jan but the teacher when quizzed by me and OH about if she is being singled out or bullied says "they all have their niggles" WTF doe that mean

So any ideas to make it special for her?

A weekend away somewhere is actually much better than a birthday party. We've done this with our two, and to be honest, I think it means more to them than having a party.

Not everyone does birthday parties and I'm sure your DSD will enjoy a weekend away with the family more until she's settled properly in school.

Hope things get easier for her. Some children can be so mean :(

Ah, sorry, just read your last post! Fair do's, Blair Drummond would be brilliant for your DSD. Plenty to see and do!

Is she interested in joining Guides? I used to be a Guider in Edinburgh (at the other end of the UK now) but I always found that because of all the different secondary options in Ed that you end up with a good mix of girls from different schools in Guides so school politics disappears. If you want to PM me your area I can try to get you some contact details.

I'm a guider in Edinburgh if you need some help. My dd went to guides knowing no one and thrives well within the group. I run brownies and I have a number of girls who don't know anyone and they've been accepted so well by the others.

I'm just wondering if the responses to the party idea may have just been one child? My dd was prone to slight massive exaggeration at that age. And they're at the tail end of "if you don't let me play you can't come to my party" age thing

She's had so much change in her life recently that perhaps its an attention thing? Not saying you're not giving her attention, but obviously this gets her MORE attention.
I'm just remembering being a 9yr old when my parents split up and new step dad moved it.

Not Critcising her or you at all by the way, it must be so tough for her to move from her siblings, are they older or younger?

Thanks Labmonkey and Groovee I'will pm you :-)

QOD unfortunately I spoke to the school and not exaggeration it was about 7 kids she moved away from 1 older sister but the 2 younger boys are with their dad and had been for the previous year but we sported it that she gets to sykpe them and she gets to see them, she starts CAHMS in June and has been through emotional abuse so her social skills are lacking

It's okay not taken as critism but she's not lacking in attention LOL as she is now an only child and apart from the emotional abuse issues and the confusion/ anger about the situation she is coping better than expected we if anything are trying to overcompensate if you like (probably too much)

Well then in that case I'll be cyber holding your hand when you go to the school, they need to sort her out poor girl. Is she part of a care order or is it more casual? She would have protection/priority if she's classed as a child in care when it comes to school choices.

Best of luck

I just read this and thought "Guides" immediately - hope you get her a place. No advice re school that hasn't been covered but hope she is happier soon. You sound like a very caring person :)

Thanks QOD, the school talks the talk but the teacher seems to disregard all promises made, it also doesnt help that DSD is scared to tell on anyone

Social services didnt want to know as "she was safe now" gave the mother 7 days notice for an inspection so found nothing and never heard from the mother since we took weeone in January so no real closure for weeone either, CAHMS will hopefully (I am pinning all hope on this) help her make sense out of everything and hopefully she will talk to them

Poor sausage, at least she's got you on her side !