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Parenting

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Original poster

Should 16yo be getting a PT job?

25 replies

allnewtaketwo · 08/05/2012 18:07

When I was a school, it was the done thing to get a Saturday job of some sort, or something even just one evening a week, from about 16 to leaving school at 18.

Does this not happen these days? Wanted to get others views on this. 16 yo Dss is showing no inclination of wanting to do anything, not even in the summer break. I think it would be good for him to learn a bit of independence personally, and not least actually give him something to do, as he seems to be terminally bored with nothing to do.

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JarethTheGoblinKing · 08/05/2012 18:09

I don't know about should, but if he can find one, then yes - I think it's a good idea.

Janoschi · 08/05/2012 18:10

I got my first job at 13, washing dishes for a local cafe. I also worked for a riding school in exchange for free lessons. At 16 I was working full-time. Tell him to get off his arse.

NoGoodAtHousework · 08/05/2012 18:10

I had a Saturday job at 14! I think teenagers should get little jobs as it helps to appreciate money. (and means you don't have to shell out for everything they NEED want!

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AnyFucker · 08/05/2012 18:19

of course ! (if they are lucky enough to find one)

MaureenMLove · 08/05/2012 18:39

It's tough out there! People don't want staff for weekends anymore, because shifts for full time staff includes Saturdays & Sundays now, as shops are always open.

DD is 16 and has applied for dozens and dozens in the last month or two, but no bites yet. She is now planning on going to all the local high streets and putting her CV's in there, in the hope of getting something.

Takver · 08/05/2012 18:55

What about babysitting, Maureen - always a good way to earn a bit of extra cash.

Original poster

allnewtaketwo · 08/05/2012 18:56

Good for your Dd, hope she gets something. I think there's a big difference between not having a job despite being keen and trying, compared to not having the inclination to bother. I'd have a lot of respect for Dss if he did try. But having a 16yo wander bored around the house every other weekend asking dad what we're doing next during the summer isn't too appealing.

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upahill · 08/05/2012 19:16

I don't know about should but DS has had one for 14 months now.He is getting ready to leave school and potential employers have been asking him if he has a pt job and for how long and what his responsibilities are.

He has been able to get a great reference from his employers which he has in his record of achievements.
Also we still give him pocket money but all the money from his job has gone into a saving account

That said he was very very lucky to get a job as they are like hen's teeth round our way.

Janoschi · 08/05/2012 19:51

He could put cards through letterboxes offering mowing lawns, walking dogs, fetching shopping, washing cars etc etc. I'm sure some elderly folk would appreciate a young fella.

MaureenMLove · 08/05/2012 21:21

She could do babysitting, but I'd not be happy unless it was someone I knew and there's not many of my friends left with little ones that need babysitting tbh!

She has just taken over my cake making sideline though! She can ice cupcakes just as well as me, so when I was approached to do some last week, I saw the look in her eye and figured she needs/wants the money more than me!

Neither options are guaranteed income though really and she wants something more regular, so she can plan her social life accordingly!

Something will come up soon, I'm sure. She's more employable after her GCSE's have finished, even if it's only until September.

CogitoErgoSometimes · 09/05/2012 07:30

Of course he should be doing something! If a Saturday job doesn't appeal or doesn't exist, set him some stiff household chores to earn a very small amount of pocket money. What you shouldn't accept is that he sits around on his lazy arse expecting to be financed for doing nothing. You have to cut off his money supply of he has no incentive. My friend's son that age popped into a few local pubs and got evening jobs collecting glasses.

mumblechum1 · 09/05/2012 07:34

Of course they should do somehting. DS babysat from 15 to 17 for various families (I didn't personally know any of them). He's now 17 and in the Terriitorial Army, works one night a week and one weekend in for; doesn't pay much but he loves it.

henrysmama2012 · 09/05/2012 09:58

How old do teens have to be to get a L1 sports coaching / fitness award? They're fun qualifications to do, teens tend to find them appealing, they can lead to a lot of PR opportunities for either work or volunteering, and can open up the teen to a really positive environment. It's something I did at 18 and it's been a passion of mine now for the whole of my life (never my main job).

henrysmama2012 · 09/05/2012 10:01

Sorry PT not PR!

Octaviapink · 09/05/2012 11:34

Yes, absolutely he should get a job. I had a variety of jobs (babysitting, newspaper delivery, waitressing) from when I was 14. Good thing too, as pocket money stopped at 16!

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allnewtaketwo · 09/05/2012 12:36

Part of the problem though is that he probably doesn't think he 'needs' pocket money. He doesn't have any interests outside school other than pre-arranged sports which are booked and organised for him. He doesn't go out with mates and has no other 'hobbies'.

So unfortunately the idea of extra money wouldn't appeal to him. He doesn't really identify with the need to learn to be independent either. I would have thought that the prospect of university at £9k a year might have spurred him on, but seemingly not.

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CogitoErgoSometimes · 09/05/2012 12:50

Then it's a case of finding the job and frogmarching him gently into it :) If he is the anti-social loner type, he'll benefit.

twentyten · 09/05/2012 12:53

DH has just got DD(14) a job washing up at the golf club-she HATES the thought of it but LOVES earing the money. Brill for the CV.
She now measures value in terms of washing up hours...

cory · 09/05/2012 13:07

There are two sides to this: otoh learning responsibility through a job is a great benefit. Otoh if you have a youngster who already knows how to get by on very little money, that is a great advantage in itself, especially if he intends to go to university later on.

I was the only one of my friends who had not had a pt job before I went to university. And I was also the only one who found I could easily live within the limits of my student loan: in fact, I was able to save up so much of it that I could afford to do a year of postgraduate studies before my funding came in.

Not sure what lengths I would go to to train young people in the habit of spending money...

If the job is relevant to a particular career, that is different of course.

Original poster

allnewtaketwo · 09/05/2012 15:13

It's not that he knows how to get by on little money as such, it's that he doesn't have any interests or hobbies and doesn't do anything with friends, and hence doesn't need money. imo he effectively lives in a controlled 'bubble' and doesn't have any area of his life which is in any way independent. He'll be the same at university I imagine.

Yes great he doesn't spend money but having a 16yo skulk bored around the house on a weekend isn't the best, especially when he's asking dad "what are we doing next?", and fails to make his own bed without being reminded each and every time.

I guess I'd hoped that reaching 16 as a milestone would at least some sort of doing things outside of home such as a PT job, but I can't see it happening.

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Octaviapink · 09/05/2012 16:50

Many 16 yos are pretty apathetic - is he not into music or games (the video variety or online/computer), magazines, books, anything? And if not, I think you could strenuously suggest some ideas.

If nothing else he could start saving up for driving lessons.

twentyten · 09/05/2012 20:15

What about doing some voluntary work?If he wants to go to university that looks good on personal statements and may help him.

pippop1 · 09/05/2012 23:56

I second the voluntary stuff. Regular volunteering or a few weeks of unpaid work experience is great for the CV. It could be related to what he might want to study at Uni.

glasscompletelybroken · 10/05/2012 10:39

All my kids were working part time at 13. At 16 he should definately be doing some work and the fact that he isn't motivated suggests he has no work ethic and no interest in becoming independant. It's worrying for his future but I also know that you are not in a position to change this yourself. I will be in a similar position with my dsd's in a few years time and suspect it will send me even more bonkers than I currently am!

Original poster

allnewtaketwo · 10/05/2012 12:46

Well I will suggest the volunteering to DH and see if he wants to speak to DSS about it. It will ultimately depend on what his mum wants though, as what she says goes. Thanks all for your comments!

Yes glass I share the thought that it's worrying for his future not to want to become independent. Also very frustrating to watch!

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