Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Flip

Original poster

Breast Feeding

11 replies

ap1984 · 04/05/2012 17:57

Hi. I'm a first time mum to my nearly 3 week old son Travis

Just after some advice really. I am BF exclusively and he is having up to 14 feeds a day (more on an evening) - is this normal? I feel exhausted!

I am sure he is using me as a comforter as sometimes he falls asleep on me but he won't take a dummy (which I suppose isn't a bad thing)

I'm at a bit of a loss as to what to try - he doesn't like his moses basket at night either and I feel like I'm making a rod for my own back by giving him as much as he wants and letting him use me as a comfort but then half of me thinks he is still so young and finding his way so does it really matter?

Any help or advice would be greatly appreciated. X

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Original poster

ap1984 · 04/05/2012 17:59

Also just to add that I have tried letting him cry it out but I get so upset as he sounds like he is in distress and how long do you actually let them cry? I end up offering my boob again just to soothe him x

OP posts:

Pascha · 04/05/2012 18:02

Dont let him cry. Newborn babies need lots and lots of cuddles and as many feeds as they want. Most babies hate moses baskets. All they really want is to be near you. You won't be making a rod for your own back at all. Its absolutely normal and how it should be.

Just offer him boob every time he so much as blinks and let him cuddle as much as he wants and you will be fine.

rubyslippers · 04/05/2012 18:03

Please don't leave your 3 week old to cry it out ... You aren't making a rod. Babies needs and wants are the same thing at this age and using the boob as a soother is fine - its normal baby behaviour (a dummy is a replica nipple after all)

Does he have a good latch? Plenty of wet and dirty nappies?

So he feeds 2 hourly? Is he having both sides at a feed - comes off when he is finished with a contented look? Does he start off with rapid sucking and then deeper swallows?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Families General parenting

birdsofshoreandsea · 04/05/2012 18:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RiskItForABiscuit · 04/05/2012 18:37

It sounds like you are going with your own instincts and that's great.
He sounds completely normal and I've been through it with dc1 and going through it with dc2 right now. I freaked out with the first as I thought she should feed and sleep on her own then wih hours between. Eventually I relaxed and just offered the boob whenever I wanted or whenever she asked. Got lots of books read, tv watched and missed it when she became more mobile and not so interested in feeding.

This article helped me. It's an article written by a mother who was feeding every 45 minutes. I'm sure I had days like that and knowing it was normal made it easier to deal with somehow.

Flisspaps · 04/05/2012 18:47

All normal, no rods.

My DS is also nearly 3 weeks. He spends most of the day and night attached to my boob, either eating or just sucking for comfort. He's refused any offer of a dummy, but that's OK. It's knackering and sometimes frustrating but all normal and OK.

I leave him to cry if I need a wee or am making my lunch, other than that he's back on the breast at pretty much the first peep. He won't sleep in the Moses basket of carrycot - again, normal as at such a tiny stage they assume they're still part of you which really they are.

Just keep feeding (even if you switched to FF chances are he'd still feed as often) and cuddling, perhaps read up on how to co-sleep safely and believe me when
I say This Too Shall Pass (TTSP)

You can't make a rod for your own
back when it comes to babies so ignore anyone who tells you otherwise. Babies are MEANT to be do close to their mums, all the time, when they're this little.

Enjoy your little boy, and if you haven't already then go over to the April 2012 postnatal thread on the postnatal section - lots of others in the same boat!

Original poster

ap1984 · 04/05/2012 19:37

Wow, thank you all for the responses and already I feel so much more relaxed and reassured

He is gaining weight well and I don't mind the comfort feeding I suppose I just needed reassurance that this was normal

I love him to bits and it may not be the best but my partner has been sleeping in the spare room and baby with me on my partners side if the bed which is better than him screaming in the muses basket (although I hope he will settle in his own bed eventually)

Suppose all babies are different but to gear that this is very normal makes me feel so much better and able to continue as I am

Thank you everyone xxx

OP posts:

posypoo · 04/05/2012 19:54

Congratulations, and it sounds like you're doing fab. Definitely normal to feed loads at that age. I remember sitting down with my four week-old at midday to feed her and still more or less being there at midnight. My midwife told me that she used to just give her babies what they wanted, and they turned out to be really lovely easy-going people. I liked that philosophy, though I know it's so hard when they are tiny babies, but you're definitely doing the right thing. NB I still co-sleep in a separate bed from my husband all the time sometimes and my DD is 2! Do whatever you feel is right.

chillikat · 04/05/2012 20:51

You're about where I was a year ago - it's all fine. For more reassurance have a look at the threads on the Breast and Bottle Feeding Boards they tend to have lots of reassurance and good advice.

We also found it hard to get DD to settle in her crib. You could put something in the moses basket that smells of you so it's familiar, maybe a breast pad or bra! or try warming the basket with a hot water bottle before putting him in (make sure it isn't too hot). My husband took the mattress out of the crib and lay on it for a while to warm it a few times :) I agree with the others about not letting him cry - it's too heartbreaking, just accept that you're not going to get very much stuff done but you're doing the most important stuff which is looking after your boy.

Oh, and even at 13 months I'm still feeding to sleep and giving my daughter boob for comfort when she's fallen over or something. It's a great tool :)

Yama · 04/05/2012 20:59

It will get easier - much easier.

I haven't read all the responses but yes, totally normal. Please believe that it will get easier. Coupled with less feeding is that you will begin to get more energy - after 9 months of pregnancy (big deal) and birth (ditto).

As for sleeping arrangements - just wait until you feel able to address it. I am crap but dh did all the research and when we felt the time was right to night wean ( at 7 months) he was the expert. Well he did everyting and I slept through it.

PotPourri · 05/05/2012 17:33

My hubby took the side off the cot and attached it to my side of the bed, with the mattress at the same height as ours. It was great as I could roll over to feed my little boy in the night and when he fell asleep again, I could simply roll back over. I learnt quickly to feed lying down from both sides (but on my left side iyswim) - but it was a bit of a knack so took some practice.

You sound like you are doing great. Enjoy this time if you can, you will look back on it eventually and wish his needs were still so simple. And that you could feel so chilled as you knew how to sort it.

Flip