Am I the only one out there?!

[Boboli]

I have 2 young DDs 3 and 1 who are pretty easy little girls, well behaved, lots of fun and the centre of my world but.....

I believe that the girls fit in with our lifestyle and routines, that not every day can be crafted around keeping them entertained, I don't go over the top on birthdays and Christmas as I want them to learn the value of having a few special things rather than more things they know what to do with. When I say no, I mean no - mostly I don't go in for coaxing my 3 year old to see my point of view, rules are rules and I'm consistent on this. I wouldn't say I'm overly strict just that I don't stand nonsense. (obviously 1 year old is law unto herself!!). THis was how I was brought up, I had a wonderful childhood, great relationship with my mum and dad, then and now.

Over the past year I've been quite aware that majority of my friends with their children seem to be way the other end of the spectrum. The days are filled with activities to keep the children entertained, if plans have been made and the children don't want to do something, plans are changed. Ridiculous amounts of presents are bought for Christmas and birthdays - things that perhaps can't be afforded in the first place. Discipline is never firm or serious - it's that softly softly voice and then distraction as a last resort so the children never understand that throwing that heavy thing at the window is just not on.

No wonder teachers have these problems when they get to school age - if children are conditioned to think they are centre of the universe then they will act it.

Am I alone in this?

Oh, thanks senses!

My latest peeve is teachers who coo "well done!" or "good boy!" to a 7yo kid who manages to grunt "fine" to a teacher's "how are you this morning?". And yes, the one grunting "fine" is often MY kid! I am TRYING to make it stop, to get him to smile politely, look the teacher in the eye and say "good, thanks - how about you?", but maybe that's me being all American about it...

In any event, while this may be hijacking the topic a little, I think a lot of adults' problems with getting respect from kids is the fact that they don't always demand respect themselves. Some of them are afraid they will get stick from offended parents so they let things slide. But adults who demand respect consistently from kids, I find, usually get it. If DS's teacher stopped giving him and all the other kids the gooey "well done!"s and waited expectantly while they answered her politely she might get a better response.

In a lot of respects I agree with the OP. I do see a lot of completely unnecessary expenditure on really young children and you do wonder how they learn the value of things if all it takes is an 'I want' to get, or do, anything at all. My general principle is every member of the family should be valued; nobody 'rules the roost', don't waste, and rules are there for a reason.
That said - and I think this doesn't contradict the OP as such, but is along the lines of what chunky was saying - DD and I do several cheap/free 'activities' that are geared completely towards her most weeks: but if we sequestered ourselves at home all the time I wouldn't be able to do what I wanted anyway, and both of us would go nuts. A 2 year old can entertain themselves for a while and mine does, but it's inevitable that at some point she'll need supervision or a change of scene, and right now it isn't enough for me to rely on her entertaining herself for long enough for me to do the ironing, clean the house and wash up without interruption.
In a year, she'll be more independent and in six years I probably won't see her for dust, but I try to be attuned towards what's realistic as well.
You might be lucky OP if you can do a load of washing up before your toddler sticks their head through the stairgate (again)!