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Original poster

Health visitor problems???

46 replies

cezza30 · 20/04/2012 20:29

my baby is putting on weight but hv insists not enough and im having to get him weighed every week im breastfeeding and there now saying if he doesnt put on what the chart says i will HAVE to put him on formula so sick of being made to feel like im doing something wrong anyone else have this problem??

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Igglefriggle · 20/04/2012 20:33

Is DC maintaining centiles, other signs good? Wet nappies, alert etc? HV arent compulsory - you can stop going to clinic etc.

startail · 20/04/2012 20:40

If your baby looks happy and healthy wet nappies etc as stated above, avoid clinic for a week or two.
Nothing worse than stress for reducing milk supply.
Nothing more likely to induce stress than HV in my experience.

diyqueen · 20/04/2012 20:44

I'd suggest finding a breastfeeding drop-in near you and see if they can give you advice on making sure your baby's latched on properly, feeding regularly enough etc. It's hard to advise without knowing all the details, and you don't say how old your baby is - you may be doing all this already but I'd say feed on demand and offer frequently even if baby's not 'demanding', avoid using a dummy, offer milk every time baby wakes in the night... There are plenty of things you can try instead of resorting to formula and it's a shame if you haven't been given any constructive advice.

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ReallyTired · 20/04/2012 20:46

You don't have to go to clinic. Babies don't always follow the charts.
If your health visitor is seriously worried about your baby's weight she will come out to see you.

How old is your baby? Has your baby gained his/her birthweight? Was your baby born large? Large babies often fall through the centiles. Ie. a healthy newborn might be on the 95th centile and later on fall through the centiles as their wieght becomes proportionate their their length. Has the health visitor measured baby's length?

If you don't like your health visitor then you can go to a different clinic. A good health visitor is worth her weight in gold, but a duff health visitor is a nightmare.

Original poster

cezza30 · 20/04/2012 20:56

he is 3 months n was born 9.4 went dwn to 8.11 then bk up to 9.8 hasnt lost since thn is now 12.5 he is def latched on prop and feeds for 40 mins 2o mns each side hv has measured him n said hes in proportion but still goin on bout ths chart dont know of any drop ins.....

OP posts:

ReallyTired · 20/04/2012 21:04

Are you or your husband naturally small?

The size of baby depends a lot on how well nourished it is in the womb. The size of a baby at a year depends on genetics. Ie. a healthy 5ft woman might have an 9lb baby and the baby's wieght will fall to the centile that is destined by genetics.

MoonlightandRoses · 20/04/2012 23:19

Have had three friends who experienced this - if the HV has admitted to you he's in proportion and your GP is happy with his health, then please don't be bullied into something you are not comfortable doing.
Not sure where in the UK you are, but if you look at the NHS website Services section they may have B/f clinics listed in your area.
Another good resource is kellymom.com/bf/concerns/breastfeeding-helplines/ which has good general advice as well as a list of the main UK helplines

PooPooInMyToes · 21/04/2012 18:13

The hv can't tell you that you HAVE to do anything! Babies don't always follow the charts.

Unless your baby is dropping a lot of centiles? Has that happened?

Remember that they are not the baby police! They are not your childs parent, you are!

NeedlesCuties · 21/04/2012 20:43

Your HV can't force you to do anything. Scaring a mother like that is bullying and ignorant.

If you think your DC is putting on weight and thriving then tell your HV to feck off. You see your DC every day, she sees him for a few minutes whenever you bring him to her. I'd guess your the better judge of what is best.

BillyBollyBandy · 21/04/2012 20:44

What percentiles has he been/is he on? That will show if he has any feeding problems.

naturalbaby · 21/04/2012 20:50

Is the weight chart for formula fed babies or breastfed babies? You don't have to do anything you don't want to. If your baby has been ebf then he might need a lot of persuading to take a bottle anyway and the thought of it put me under a lot of extra stress so wouldn't have been worth it (I was considering mixed feeding as I was exhausted).

I had a battle of wills with my hv insisting I start baby rice at 17 weeks due to slow weight gain and went back for a couple of weight checks then didn't go for a month. They didn't ask if I'd started baby rice but were happy with his weight so there was no more talk of it.

Original poster

cezza30 · 22/04/2012 17:52

me n my hubby def not small lol although we both take a while to gain/lose weight, baby was born on 75th centile n now is on 25th or something as i say hasnt lost weight or maintained has put on every week but dipping on chart i hate this chart is the bane of my life!!! i keep asking hvs if chart takes bf into consideration n still no answer i spoke to docs they said i shud go there to get him weighed to cover myself coz hvs could report me if i just stop going to clinic! might just tell hv to come house i feel like when i go to clinic im on trial might feel more comfortable in my own home im so frustrated coz i know theres no feeding problems even my hubby said baby sounds like drinking a bottle when he feeds of me im topping him up and hes happy hes growing fine is happy and trying to sit up already is always laughing hes not, not thriving in anyway do feel like the hvs think im not picking up to feed him enough but i really am got an appt to see paedatrician so will take whatever they say to hvs.

OP posts:

NeedlesCuties · 22/04/2012 18:26

As far as I have heard, those charts are based on formula fed, white Western males. Don't think it takes into account other variables such as if you are a different race, exclusively breastfeeding etc.

As for your doctor telling you the HV can report you for not going to clinic... seriously?? If you're taking your child to the weekly clinic it is an optional thing, no way is it compulsory.

If you can hear and feel that your DS is drinking from you, then he is drinking from you and you are fine.

I suggest re-posting your OP in the 'Breast and Bottle Feeding' section on Mumsnet, they were always so helpful when I was bfing DS.

ReallyTired · 22/04/2012 18:34

"As for your doctor telling you the HV can report you for not going to clinic... seriously?? hmm confused If you're taking your child to the weekly clinic it is an optional thing, no way is it compulsory."

Loads of second time mums hardly go to clinic. If the health visitor is really concerned then she will visit you. I think that medical professionals can inform social services if a parent is refusing medical help for their child. If a baby is failing to thrive and the parents are refusing help then its understandable that the health visitor might wonder what the parents are trying hide.

You could ask for a paediatric referal. You would then know if there is really a problem or not.

Original poster

cezza30 · 22/04/2012 18:40

yea really tired think doc was just makin sure i cover my own back i will tell hv is welcome to come to my home but im not going to clinic i see diff h/v everytime and feel like havin to explain myself i asked shouldnt bf be enough? and hv said yes it should so feel like she was sayin im doin something wrong i have appt to go to paediatric clinic in a few weeks

OP posts:

Codandchops · 22/04/2012 18:40

cezza, as a HV myself I am used to seeing babies and charts. What I have learned is that there are no hard and fast rules. Babies are very rarely on the same centile at a year as the oe they were born on.

Your HV's issue is that your baby has dropped more than 2 centiles - this is probably entirely normal (and from your description I am sure it is ) however, your HV will have been told to refer to watch babies who do this.
Tbh though she needs to look at your baby as well as the chart, I don't worry about happy laughing babies who gain weight more slowly. I do worry of they gain weight slowly and the Mum is saying "I am worried about my baby".

Original poster

cezza30 · 22/04/2012 18:46

yea i understand they have protocol to follow but for eg we decided i was goin docs to check him over and hv said have you had his heart checked? i felt sick and couldnt relax till i went docs i thought that was worrying me un-neccsarily as she knew i was goin docs already every fri i go to weigh in and come home worried and depressed :{

OP posts:

Codandchops · 22/04/2012 18:54

Babies with underlying heart problems usually have a Mum saying "something is wrong with my baby". It's usually very apparent there is something wrong.

That's why I look beyond charts at the baby and listen to what the Mum has to say - a Mum saying like you that their baby is happy, smiling and alert is reassuring.

All charts should be based on breastfed babies now.

The other thing to bear in mind is that if there was no clinics or weighing would you be worried? If the answer is "no I wouldn't" then you can pretty much say your DD is growing just as she should be

Original poster

cezza30 · 22/04/2012 19:00

thanks i know theres nothing wrong so hopefully when weve see consultant ill be left alone lol

OP posts:

Rubirosa · 22/04/2012 19:02

Mine was also born on the 75th and dropped to (just below) the 25th by 4 months. He is still on the 25th at 20 months! I never had him weighed more than monthly and stopped weighing entirely at 6 months - I can see he is healthy.

If the HV starts hassling you about formula, tell her you want a referral to a paediatrician before taking such a drastic step. I bet she will back down then!

flagnogbagnog · 22/04/2012 19:09

My DD was just like this. The health visitor kept calling it 'failure to thrive' and I really thought I was doing something wrong. But I knew she was fine. Alert, happy reaching all her milestones etc. She's 5 now, is a petite little thing with hardly any appetite. It's just the way she is.

As a baby, at no point did she loose weight. I have also managed to feed 2 strapping boys who no problem gaining weight. I reckon it's just the way some kids are.

Original poster

cezza30 · 22/04/2012 19:12

yea i will do going to ring her tomoz see consultant in few weeks :}

OP posts:

wicketter · 22/04/2012 19:18

Has he been checked for a tongue tie. My ds was really slow to put on weight and that was the reason but it took ages for someone to check.

Original poster

cezza30 · 22/04/2012 20:03

whats tongue tie?

OP posts:

wicketter · 22/04/2012 21:01

Its a bit of skin under the tongue that can make it difficult to feed if it is too small. It is so often overlooked. His was only checked because i had successfully bf two other dc

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