baby wont take daytime naps

[bellini1]

My 7 month old baby has never been great at sleeping in the day but does sleep all night from about 6.30 to 6 am. He goes down for his first nap at 9 ish really well and will sleep for ages if I let him. Since I started on 3 meals a day he has been an absolute nightmare to get to sleep after lunch. He just cries and cries. I have tried the following:
black out blinds
dummies (he hates them)
mobile with lights
leaving him to cry
I haven't really tried controlled crying yet though. He will sleep if we go out in the pram or car. He will also sleep if I sit in the nursery with him in my arms and a bottle in his mouth (little monkey !).Im going out of my mind because he gets so upset due to being tired. Im going back to work for 3 days a week in June and hes going to be in a nursery. Im so worried that he wont get any sleep at nursery. I really need some fresh ideas. HEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLPPPPPPPPPPP !!

At 7 months its not completly nessercery to take two naps in the day anymore, have you tried moving his 9am nap later in the day?
My Ds2 used to nap at 9ish and 3pm-ish till about 9 months now he's 18 months and naps from 11/12 till 2/3pm depending on his mood. When they don't want to nap there's no forcing the issue. You just have to juggle things about and see what results in the least cranky baby.
As for nursery I wouldn't worry I'm sure they are used to all sorts and you may find once in nursery, his scheduale changes all over again

But if he's getting really tired and grumpy, you obviously want to help him have a sleep!
I do leave DS (now 8mo) to cry to sleep, because he always always cries before he falls asleep, unless he has my boob in his mouth at the time. After a few days of a lot of yelling at nap time, he got really good at going to sleep in his cot, with a mobile on.
We do have days when he just can't go to sleep though, and he gets really upset. It's horrid, because I can't rock/shush him to sleep any more - it's him and his mobile or in the car/pram.
Would you try some form of controlled crying?

My friend had this with her DC3. Her other two slept no problem, but DD2 never did daytime naps. Was crap, but at least she slept all night!
Sorry, no advice as she never "cracked it"!
I agree with trying to move the 9am sleep to later if possible.

I used to either feed mine to sleep or put her in the pushchair and go for a walk. That's still my method... we also never cracked the 'proper' methods!

I'm with PosyPoo - and I still have to take DD (now 2) out in a buggy to get her to nap in the day (althoguh she will sleep on a mat at nursery, the little bugger). To be honest, if you are getting a 12 hour stretch at night, you are doing really well, and personally I'd be loathed to muck about with that for the sake of doing controlled crying for naps (although I'm not a fan of CC anyway...).

thanks for all the advice. I haven't tried controlled crying as he just thinks its funny when I go into the nursery. When you say move the morning sleep forward, what time do you think? 9.30 ? Its difficult when he's woken up at 6 with a full nappy so he's tired by 8.30. If he doesn't have a full nappy he sleeps till 7.

I think Im just getting wound up because Im trying to do what the 'experts' recommend. (2-4 hours sleep in day apparently !). Well its just not happening. Its good to know that other people experience the same thing.

My 7m old now seems to nap at 9.30 ish for half hour and either 1ish or 3ish again for half hour. Even if in car or buggy it is still only half hour. However at night he will often wake 4/5 times and is on 3 meals a day plus some formula and bf. Sometimes if he is really complaining I put a rug on sofa or floor and rock him to sleep there rather than have the cot battle. I would move sleep to 9.30 but not let him sleep more than an hour an try again after lunch.

I would try only letting him sleep in the morning for 45 minutes (one sleep cycle) and see if that makes a difference. Also you might want to try starting that first nap a bit earlier at about 8.30. You want him to really feel sleepy after lunch. Controlled crying is strongly not recommended for under-1s because of the neural pathways it can set up to do with anxiety and depression.

He will sleep at nursery. In the meantime, if he sleeps OK in the pram, deliberately take him for a walk every morning and every afternoon so that he gets in the habit of falling asleep at about the same time each day.

Is that true about controlled crying?
I got told off by the HV yesterday for still feeding DS when he wakes in the night, and given a leaflet on controlled crying (he's not yet 9 mo).

Your HV is quite wrong to push you towards CC, and it's perfectly normal for them still to be waking for feeds in the night at that age. DD woke for proper feeds (not just put-me-back-to-sleep nibbles) until she was 9m and DS until he was 11m.

IMO HVs are programmed to automatically recommend CC. I guess it depends on how much you want to follow the books: IMO (again) I think we'd all do better to follow our child's cue: if they are tired, let them sleep, if they are hungry let them eat. It's less convenient for us (nad bloody frustrating) but they are tiny, they haven't read the books, and they are going on instinct. Things do settle down: the people I know whose children were settled into a routine at an early age have mostly had issues with the children subsequently regressing massively, so even if you do manage to fit into what the books, say, don't expect it to be a permanent state of affairs! "This too will pass" sadly seems to apply as much for the good stuff as the bad with small children...!

PS he will sleep at nursery. I think they get pretty good at taking their cues from other children and will often be more co-operative with people other than you, so don't panic.

could you just let him have a really long nap in the morning, however long he needs? Then just do a top up nap later. This is the pattern my DS wants to be in (hes nearly 7 months) and if were not busy in the morning I go with it ( I hate waking babies!)

Alternatively I limit his first nap by making it in the buggy then he will sleep longer at lunch, usually.

Agree with all who say they will sleep at nursery - my DD was a terrible napper but they always managed to get her to sleep, even now when she's dropped all daytime naps with me she will still sleep there

Ooh, glad to hear that even the difficult nappers will sleep at nursery - when DS is having a bad day I wonder how he'll cope when he has to go to nursery.
I am fairly happy to still be feeding at night, and it is proper feeding he does. Obviously I'd rather we both got to sleep all night, but he has clearly not read the books. It did bother me a bit that the (very nice) HV felt the need to say, "Tut tut" when I told her I still feed him when he wakes though, because "if he's eating 3 meals a day he won't be hungry at night".
We are a pretty un-routine-y household, so DS gets food/milk when he's hungry, and sleep when he's tired, so I don't think I'll be withholding nighttime milk for a while yet.

Sorry OP, derailing your thread a bit here.