Leavng dcs in the car?

[Imsosorryalan]

Ok following another thread where someone said they would never leave their dcs in the car while they 'popped' to the shop/garage.
My q is do you / have you ever done this?
If im totally honest, i have. It really has only been for a few minutes and i always lock the car, both are always happy for me to go and I wouldnt dream of leaving them if they didnt want me to. Am i a terrible mother?

If you are, then so am I. I always leave DD3 in the car if I'm just nipping in to pay for petrol/grab a paper. Can't see what the problem is, though I'm sure someone will be along soon enough to explain why we are evil bad mothers and I don't give a flying fuck

Yep, done it good few times. My DS is 20 months and HATES the process of getting into the car seat. Once he is strapped in, he is as good as gold.

So this afternoon for instance, driving back from an adventure playground. He was exhausted. I swooped into a garage station, dashed into the shop, picked up milk, veg and juice, checked the car twice, paid, and then swooped back into the car. DS looked like he hadn't even clocked I had gone. He had been gazing out the window at the truck that had pulled into the garage.

If I had taken him out of the car, a 4/5 min dash, would have turned into a fifteen minute meander, no doubt a tantrumn thrown in as he was tired and hungry, and then a struggle to get him back into the car.

I absolutely do do it, and I will do it again. I would only do it if I can see the car from the shop.

So you can guess my answer to your question.... NO! You are NOT a terrible mother at all, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

phew

I do it. Think dragging three children on my own across a road or garage forecourt is far more dangerous. I also don't lock the door. They inevitably set the alarm off and a I have a paranoia about fire, the thoguht of locking them in feels wring. They are in sight all the time

You are all terrible mothers who are putting your children at risk of all those car jackers & exploding petrol stations that happen every day all day long.

Children should be tied to our hip 24/7 and I won't have you tell me anything different.

I haven't been to the toilet alone since the day by PFB arrived and he will be 21 tomorrow.

:)

I leave mine in the car to pay for petrol, or when I park right outside the dry cleaners to nip in and grab my clothes.

I wouldn't leave DS1 when he was little - combo of PND and PFBitis!

He he good one Bohica (really hope your joking).

I've done it a few times too, I have 3 so again, bringing them in to grab a carton of milk at the petrol station isn't an option. I wouldn't do it if I wasn't able to see them easily or if they weren't happy about it. I don't think any of us are bad parents for doing it even if it's not 100% the right thing, then again, I never claimed to be perfect!

You are of course right Bohica, it is tragic just how many cars are jacked every single day, not to mention 17 exploding petrol stations just last Wednesday. The only reason DD3 is left in the car is because I have my three teens strapped to me and to add another would be terribly cumbersome....

I have never taken my children with me to pay for petrol. Not in 10 years.

I love this thread, I feel a bit more normal.

I spent years reading MN exploding car threads and feeling horribly guilty.

Pre dc I swore I never would....3dc's under 3yrs later I have a few times but only on our drive, at dc1's nursery or for the postbox.

I can't do it at a petrol station or at the shops though, I'd still rather drag 3 kids out their car seats across the petrol forecourt/car park than leave them in the car.

I've seen a fire start in a parked car engine twice so it may be rare but my mind races enough with horror stories.

Never left the DC for longer than nipping to get a parking ticket. Even then I would return to DD1 in tears!

We usually top up the car when DH is about at the weekend. Purely cause thats the way it works out..I only potter around to toddler groups etc so dont go through much petrol.

OK - I shall make you feel much better about this. I often used to pop into Asda on the way home when I had 3 under 5's - there was always something I'd run out of. Guaranteed they were always asleep in their car seats so I used to leave them in the car and dash round Asda's. They never woke up once (and if they had they would have sat staring out the window). I just thought it was kinder to them than getting them all out and dragging them round for a pack of nappies. They are all much older and still alive and in my possession ;)

Yes of course it's normal. I will be doing it in about half an hour when I take the dogs to kernels, I'm not man-handling all four of them out of the car and carry a baby and try and hold a toddler's hand!

Yes, I do at petrol stations but not for other shops.
Even though I live in Christchurch nz, and there have been a number of large earthquakes

I don't, other than the very rare occasion I can't use a pay at pump petrol station because I think there's more chance of him being run over than anything else happening there! If I need to nip to the shop we walk, if I'm on my way home from somewhere I'll park up at home then walk over to the shop together before going in the house. There's a newsagent virtually over the road from my house, and a supermarket about 10-15 mins walk away. Think it's from watching too much CSI though rather than a genuine fear, and the extra walking is helping burn off my wobbly bits!

I've always done it. In fact when DCs were tiny and asleep in the car, I used to do far too much of my shopping in the BP Garage .

How about short dashes into shops where you haven't got sight of the DCs? I don't as I have an irrational fear I will get reported to SS for child neglect/abandonment or our car will get stolen with DCs in!!!! However, DH nipped into a builders merchant the other day and left DCs in the car for a few minutes, out of sight. I was a bit (they are 3 and nearly 6yo).

As someone pointed out on another thread yesterday, 30 years ago parents left LOs outside shops in their prams, the thinking being that people were less likely to nick an expensive pram if the baby was still in it .

Yep, I leave ds2 in the car when I nip to the shops and he doesn't mind at all (garage forecourt, corner shop etc Unfortunately he has to come for the big shop [grr] )
DS1 on the other hand has never been left. We didn't have a car until the last few months. So ds2 is used to it (he is 1) and ds1 (3 years) freaks out because he is not.
Pure nightmare.

I keep leaving him in the hope it will get better, but alas, I cannot take much more staring and pointing from strangers who think I am neglecting my (screaming) child in the car.

If I took him though the task would take about a year longer to complete.

You can't bargain with my 3 year old!

Mainly now, unless it's urgent, I simply wait until I have dropped ds1 at nursery before attempting to nip out for anything. It's just easier that way.

Mine are now 9 and 5 RedHot and I've just started leaving them in the car for 10 mins or so if I really need to pop into the supermarket and they don't want to come. I'm confident that in an emergency DD1 could get them both out of the car and safely come and find me.

This doesn't apply to me as I don't drive but I think DH leaves them when paying for petrol.

Quick question though, I live three minutes walk from my DC school, you can see the infant yard and Junior gate from my front window.
Loads of Parents park outside my house at pick up time and leave sleeping toddlers/babies in their cars and I don't bat an eyelid, but I wouldn't consider leaving my younger DC asleep in the pram or cot while I went to school for the older ones.
Why is that? Is it just me?

notso someone will be along in a minute to say its because you might be run over when you went out and no-one would know the baby was alone, or you might lock yourself out, or baby might suddenly randomly start choking, or the house could catch fire etc. I think I probably would leave the LO in the situation you describe if they had just settled for a nap and you could see your older ones were already in the playground.

Only just started doing this. Dd is 3 1/2 and like others have said, it makes a mission of posting a letter to get her out etc. I park right in front of the postbox and take 5 seconds to pop a letter in. No risk there.

Petrol...just started this. I try to do pay at pump but when I can't I assess the forecourt and pop in to pay without her if it isn't busy. If there's a giant queue she'll come in with me.

Picking up a prescription. This is done at the doctors and again, I park directly by the glass door and can see her the entire time.

At last common sense prevails....none of my 5 have ever felt abandoned or unsafe...eldest nearly 14 now, so he might think it a bit odd if I started insisting he come with me now