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Original poster

To those who have kids close in age - WHEN DOES IT GET EASIER?????

20 replies

Pagan · 06/02/2006 11:58

Please let me know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I'm soooooo fed up just now. DD is 2.5 DS is 1 year and they are such hard work. Not anything in particular, just the age they are both at. DS is just getting mobile so is into everything including DD's stuff. DD is at the getting bored if we don't do stuff stage so needs to get out and about. Trying to juggle everything is driving me nuts. It's all such a faff. Even going to the shops is a faff but what's the alternative, getting on-line shopping and then not going out at all??? When one of them is napping it's great fun with the other but I feel like a crap mum for just shouting all the time when they are at their inquisitive and whiney worst. Rant over thankyou for reading this far

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SleepyJess · 06/02/2006 12:01

Have no idea but can't see light at end of tunnel (don't think there is one) 'cos DS2 (18 months younger than middle child, DD) has so many SN that he is probably going to be a 'baby' - in many respects - forever

nitfreecod · 06/02/2006 12:03

i had htat gap
noa bt bigger
tis get betrt when one goes to nursery at 3

Dinosaur · 06/02/2006 12:06

By the time one is 3.5 and the other is 2 it will have become a lot easier. It gradually sneaks up on you. A revelation for me was cooking Christmas dinner when DS1 was 4 and DS2 was 2 and realising I hadn't had to do anything for them for the duration - they'd just played together really happily.

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nitfreecod · 06/02/2006 12:06

yes it is tough esp whent he 2 year odl tantrums

doormat · 06/02/2006 12:07

when they leave home
only joking when child goes to nursery, it does get easier

jco · 06/02/2006 12:14

Hi pagan, there is a similar age gap between my two children. I never planned it that way, number two was a 'surprise'.

When they were the same age as yours i used to be so unhappy as it was so hard, i can remeber walking around the park with the double buggy quietly crying to myself because it was all getting on top of me. Now they are 7 and almost 6 and i'm actually rather glad i had them so close because it's turned out to be a blessing in disguise. Now, because they are a similar age they are both interested in the same thing. they spend a lot of time playing together, although they do squabble they love each other to pieces. Its easier for me because they are so happy to just run around the house playing together that they keep themselves entertained while i get other stuff done. Last sunday morning i woke up to find they had both gone into my daughters bedroom and had put on a dvd, they sat there happily for an hour watching it while i lay in bed!!!!! first lie-in in years!!!.

I promise you hun that things will get better. I know it won't feel like it right now but it will.

fairyjay · 06/02/2006 12:21

jco
Relate so much to what you're saying. When they're little (mine are 16 mths. apart) it is sheer drudgery. I remember walking up and down covered shopping malls in the bad weather, just trying to pass some time. It then gets so much better, because they're of a similar age, and you can plan for them to do the same things. We're off skiing next week, and at 12 and 13 they're great company for their very active father, whilst I can settle down with a good book!

tinytotmummy · 06/02/2006 12:32

Hi Pagan, kind of at a similar stage to you at the mo. My DS is 28m and DD is 13m. I am finding that now DD is crawling, cruising and climbing its soo much harder. She is really into DS toys and he is really possesive of them, so this leads to screaming and pushing and generally one hurting the other. DS doesn't sleep during the day anymore and because of that gets tired and tetchy in the afternoon and things just escalate. I often have days when I feel that I'm totally useless and that every other mum I meet with 2 children seems to cope effortlessly, where as I struggle to get both out the house.

Original poster

Pagan · 06/02/2006 12:42

Oh thank you thank you. DD starts nursery after summer so it'll be great for her, me and DS. Only 8 months to go

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emmawill · 06/02/2006 13:37

OH my goodness I shouldn't of read this thread my 1st has just turned a year and I have just had my 2nd 4 days ago and now feeling very worried, I'll expect fun times ahead then!!!!

jambuttie · 06/02/2006 14:20

I have 3 boys 1 @ 4 and twins at 2

must say at 4.30 mon-fri I am relieved to be going to work as I am so bloody stressed out

elliott · 06/02/2006 14:26

I have a 2 year gap so a bit bigger, but I have noticed things getting easier in the last few months - seems to depend mostly on the stage the younger one is at, as my older one has always been easy going and good at playing by himself. Ds2 is now 2.2 and they are getting much better at playing together, or at least peaceful co-existence! I don't yet have any time with just one, that will come in Sept when ds1 starts reception.

crazydazy · 06/02/2006 14:31

Mine are 6 and 3.7 and definitely agree with the others that as they get older you are really glad you didn't leave a big age gap. I too, found it very hard in the toddler days and remember my big pram with the buggy board attached that was so awkward!!!! DD would never walk anywhere and it was just a ballache even going to the local shops but without a doubt things do get easier. My two fight but as much as they fight they play and they stand up for each other where other kids are concerned. I think if they are closer in age they do have a strong bond which hopefully sets them up for their teenage years. My two also are very similar in personality even though they are boy and girl and enjoy doing the same kind of things.

Hang with it

ProfessorG · 06/02/2006 14:46

Mine are nearly 5 and nearly 7 . It has got a lot easier, but only 12 months ago. Sorry.

Original poster

Pagan · 06/02/2006 15:05

I'm really glad I posted this thread. You've no idea how better my day feels already

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Spidermama · 06/02/2006 15:11

Pagan in my experience they get easier at three and a half. Hang in.

crazydazy · 06/02/2006 15:32

People sometimes say to me "when are you having any more" to which I reply "no more as I have got them to a lovely age now".

Could just not imagine starting all over again with the whole baby thing. Babies are really sweet and I love newborns but its nice to hand them back.

Beetroot · 06/02/2006 15:35

I have four 18 months apart each one. It is easier now. The oldest in 12 and the youngest nearly 7. It is great now. They areall pals and there is always someone to play with.

It started getting easier when youngest was 4 ish i think

crazydazy · 06/02/2006 15:39

Agree with that Beetroot, DS will be 4 when we go on holiday this year and I am actually looking forward to it as it will be more relaxing as we know the kids will be old enough for me to not worry about them joining the kids club.

Some lovely days lazing by the pool I hope!!!

Em32 · 07/02/2006 20:50

Pagan
Don't know yet as feel the same as you - on the days I have them together. I've got a 19 1/2 month age gap and it has put me off having a third (I think.......). dd is 5 months and has never slept through. ds is 2 this week. I love them both but wouldn't recommend this gap to others (unless you are less neurotic than me!) I keep my sanity by having ds at nursery 3 days a week and am thinking of going back to work in a few months. But I'm lucky we can afford it. Marriage is under tension a lot of the time though.

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