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Original poster

Potty training for non-verbal boy?

11 replies

PeachyClair · 06/02/2006 09:54

My ds3 is non-verbal at 2.5. As far as I am aware there is no particular reason, although As and hering issues run in the family but he is too young to be assessed yet, according to HV.

He is very clearly ready for potty training. I'd quite like to delay it until the summer, my older 2 boys were about 3, but DS3 seems to get very upset and follows us around with a potty, taking off his clothes if his nappy gets wet.
I don't think I an delay much longer.

Has anybody got experience of training a non-verbal child? He can get our attention but just refuses to talk: if he says a word once it's gone again in minutes, no matter how we reinforce it.

Thanks

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Kelly1978 · 06/02/2006 10:04

my ds was still pretty non verbal at that age, it didn't stop him from potty training. Since he didn't ask for the toilet I had to rely on him going off on his own to the toilet and would follow him. If we were out he would go off on his own too, so I had to watch him like a hawk! It really wasn't any different.

I am confused why your hv thinks it is too young to test his hearing. My ds had countless hearing tests by that age, as they were convinced it was his hearing preventing him from talking. He started single words at around 27 months.

Original poster

PeachyClair · 06/02/2006 12:31

He had (and failed) lots before we moved, but the HV refused one when my Dh asked, I wasn't there but HV said they wouldn't accept the referral at the hospital as he was too young to see if it was affecting his speech.

How can I get him to signal me when he needs the potty?

OP posts:

jammydodger · 06/02/2006 12:44

Hi there. You could try a (laminated if poss, otherwise stiff card) picture of a potty, starting with showing him the picture whenever he uses it, and saying the word, then put the picture in a special place (near where the potty is kept) at his level with blu-tac/velcro etc, and enccourage him to point/pick it up etc when he goes. Gradually he'll associate the picture with the "action" and hopefully will be able to get the piccture and give it to you to show you what he wants.

However, I really think you need to push for a hearing referral and SLT referral. Try ringing up your local SLT service yourself (get the number from the GP surgery or any health visitor)..refer your ds yourself to them, and while you're on the phone ask them about hearing tests. Or go via GP for hearing. I'm a SLT and he definitely needs to be seen, it's outrageous that your HV is stopping you, particularly with a family history..

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jammydodger · 06/02/2006 12:54

By the way, when I said he definitely needs to be seen, didn't mean to worry you, just find it odd that HV hasn't wanted to refer him anyway.? How is his understanding?

Nemo1977 · 06/02/2006 12:57

hi not got experience of none verbal child but could you have something he coupld point out for the potty or teach him to sign language signs for toilet so he can explain which he needs.

he definetley sounds very ready for it. Also agree about referral to SLT funny how some HV insist on it for kids not talking by 2 and others are so laid back about it!!

nikkie · 06/02/2006 13:49

Will he sign ? Just toilet would do or a basic PECS-ie pic of potty to show an adult?

Original poster

PeachyClair · 07/02/2006 14:09

No, he won't sign either: he sort of grabs and goes 'oi' and that's the extent. he wil get a word for an hour, but then it's gone for good. Only three ever stick.

Jammydodger don't worry didn't scare me, I will admit he needs checking when we can get it. I would be happy to let it go for a bit so we can identify between AS and hearing, but he starts school a few weeks after turning 4 as he is an end July baby, and that concerns me. he starts their nursery in September and needs to be dry by then, too.

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nikkie · 07/02/2006 20:17

I guess you are just stuck with leaving pants off and a potty handy and see what happens,see if it clicks that way maybe if he is interested he may then go for a wayto express it
Sorry nomor ideas good luck

marytee · 07/02/2006 21:37

Hi Peachy

Am not sure whether you need someone else saying this, but thought would add two penneth worth. Your H/V is bang out of order re assessment. As far as AS is concerned the evidence suggests that 18 months is about the earliest for assessment. For an experienced assessment team there is not usually a problem differentiating between hearing problems and AS at 2 and a half (work as part of one of these teams btw). If you would like him to be assessed i would by pass HV and ask GP for referral. Can i ask whereabouts you live?

You might be able to get some face to face support with toilet training as well. In general i would break the toilet training down into individual stages and skills and maybe work at each separately (make them as small as possible.) I would second Jammydodgers advice re the picture. Try to aim to get him to feel comfortable just sitting on a potty to start with - to reward him (anyway that works for him!) for sitting on it rather than failing to perform. Does he like books? A potty book or special toy that only appears at potty time can be useful in getting them on in the 1st place.

Another thought (and some people don't like this one!) but does he get the opportunity to watch others going to the toilet? It sounds a bit weird, but if never seen (or not recently) other people going can be confusing. However he may wish to graduate straight to adult loo, which may not be ideal!

Sorry if bit repetative!
HTH
MT

Original poster

PeachyClair · 08/02/2006 17:07

Yes he has seen it- with one As child I daren't shut the door ever (sorry if tmi) and also he has two older (6 and 5) brothers to observe.

Thank you I do know I have to bypass HV, I'm not fussed aboutt hat but I don't want DH thinking I have no confidence in what he told HV as I wasn't there iyswim.

i think potty and pants is the best thing- maybe I can try a picture, I think he might use it if I reinforce it a lot. I shall take a pic of the potty with the digi camera, that seems easiest doesn't it?

OP posts:

beckybrastraps · 08/02/2006 17:32

My dd doesn't talk - I don't think there's any particular reason, she's just lazy. I started off just leaving off her nappy and she sat down on the potty when she wanted to go. Now I leave the potty in the living room and she just brings it to me when she wants it. It is much slower than it was with my ds (who could talk) but she was oretty insistent. I would prefer her to talk, because I much prefer using the toilet from the start, but she can't bring that to us. I'm also surprised about the hearing test. Dd had one at 19 months when I raised concerns with my HV. She was keen to rule it out in fact. SHe then just checked she was generally communicative (she is) and then we decided to see what happened. At 2.5 and still non-verbal she would be referred for speech therapy.

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