teenagers, aspergers, lying, secondary school

[snetty]

Has anyone else experienced their teenage, Asperger child lying? Some believe that those with Aspergers can't lie but my research discovered that they can and do under certain circumstances. I'd be interested in hearing of your expriences.

My son has been coming home with stories of bullying and the school has said that they are concerned about his stories, which, when they have investigated them have been shown to have been either exaggerated or fabricated. Has anyone else experienced this sort of behaviour with their ASD child?

Snetty

Yes!

My son is autistic and I was always of the understanding that people on the autistic couldn't lie or found it very difficult to do so and are often caught out. However in the last 6 months it has become clear that my son is infact a very accomplished liar, however his father (whom he lives with) is a compulsive liar and I believe he has probably been taught / learn't from his dad.

I ment to ask the school (a specialist autistic unit) at parents day on Friday but forgot I will be asking them after easter how common this is.

Just to add my son is not in his teens he is 8.

Interesting that you chose to post here and not in SN, any particular reason why you want the world and her partner offering thoughts about something as specific as this? If you want more tailored thoughts, pop over to the SN board.

Short answer, yes, children with AS can lie, they are usually not very good at it for various reasons.

To me, the key is 'My son has been coming home with stories of bullying and the school has said that they are concerned about his stories, which, when they have investigated them have been shown to have been either exaggerated or fabricated.'

Firstly, children with AS often don't see events in the same way that NT children do, a joke becomes a taunt, a pun becomes an attempt to trick and missing social triggers often means that they get into deep shit with their peers for not understanding and then they respond inappropriately and OTT in the NTs eyes.
So that's where exaggeration comes in, difference of perspective. That's before you bring in sensory issues such as volume and contact.
Fabrication may be occurring because there is a problem your DS is not coping with, the solutions and strategies he's using or having put in place for him aren't working so he's trying to make a bigger fuss so that things get sorted to his liking, make a bigger fuss and someone will see how serious it is.
You need to sit down with the form tutor, the SENCO and any other inclusion support and work out what is actually happening and what the best way to resolve the problems are.

The kids with Aspergers that I work with often seem to be lying but in reality it's often just that their perception of what happened isn't correct but their 'black and white' thinking style makes it hard for them to move past their understanding of the situation.

Mine is 17, Vicarinatutu has a son with AS who is older, maryz will be her usual fountain of advice and good sense if she spots this. There are a few of us here with teens with AS.

Oh, and to the world and her partner, we are not excusing anything here on the grounds of SN, we are searching for an explanation and offering a number of possible causes.
One of the stupid things that happens is that people hear ' People with Asperger's can't lie' and take that as an absolute truth, in the same way that other wild generalisations are stated as iron facts.
It is a spectrum of infinite variety and combinations.
No absolutes.