Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Am i being too PFB?

4 replies

Debeez · 31/03/2012 17:18

DS(aged 8) has a friend (aged 7) in the street, on previous occasions this child has been in my house, went over to speak to his mother, informed her her son was with us, fine. Child requested a snack, agreed but asked if he had any allergies. Yes he does, eggs and nuts. Mother hadn't mentioned this at all. Turns out is true. So glad I didn't just give him something.

On another occasion DS and friend were playing in street, called in DS as time to pick up DP from work. Child informs us his parents have gone for a walk, he's locked out of house. Parents assumed he was ok in street with my son, as I was in, no mention of going out, no asking if we would keep an eye on son, he could have gone missing and I wouldn't have known to raise the alarm or that he was considered in my care. I have no contact details for the parents and couldn't just take him with me without asking.

Today DS playing with friend in street, I'm in our rather large yard digging. I am not visible to the mother. I hear friends mother ask DS if he wanted to come to the park bout half a mile away in a "Are you coming?" way. Obviously my DS asked me first. I said no.

I'm sure all would have been fine and feel bloody awful refusing a trip to the park on such a lovely day, normally I would have tagged along solving all issues but not possible today due to awaiting phone call and tea actually on stove etc. I trust my son and he's a sensible boy but I do not trust this mother. Should I trust my son or my gut instinct? Anyone been in a similar position?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
MagsAloof · 31/03/2012 17:22

I think you should have a word with her, in an upfront, friendly way and tell her your ground rules. It would be a shame if the boys friendship wasn't allowed to continue. However, in all honesty, I wouldn't be happy with my child playing at her house, as she obviously has some very different ideas to mine on how you care for 7 yr olds.

Debeez · 01/04/2012 15:40

Thanks Mags. I'm not planning to interfere in the friendship, not the boys fault how his mother parents him and he is a nice polite boy, sure they'll continue to play out together. Just felt awful refusing the park trip, head vs heart type thing.

I'm not going to bring it up with the Mother either, the boy is well looked after and well cared for from what I can see, obviously her approach to parenting is different to mine. For example I think it was wrong to ask my son as she was leaving, I think she expected him just to follow on from the way she asked. I'm the overthinking type parents, yes you can have an ice pole, but what are your allergies and has your mummy said yes type of parent. :o

OP posts:
Hassled · 01/04/2012 15:45

You're not being PFB, you're just being the type of parent you are - I'm the same, and I have 4 DC!

I have a friend who sounds similar to your neighbour - incredibly (to me) laid back about the whereabouts of her DC etc but equally incredibly (to me) anxious about their health and takes them to the GP at the slightest sneeze, whereas I tend to wait until they're bleeding from a major artery. So I think we all have our own neurosis - there's bound to be something you're quite casual about and she isn't, IYSWIM.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Debeez · 01/04/2012 15:54

I also have major chip on shoulder with her as she's canny posh and I'm rough as a badgers arse. Don't think I'd dare question her parenting. Some more of my neurosis for you there.

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread