Is it worth carrying on?

[ilovespinach]

ds is almost 6 and due to start school this autumn.
We speak only English at home as both dh and I are English. Ds has had exposure to the majority language for 3 years through kindergarten. He speaks it very poorly, small vocab and with many missing sounds (although they are there in English). He has one on one time with a speech therapist for about a year now and it helps him and he is making progress.

Back to school :( We have the choice to hold him back a year or maybe the chance to send him to a specialist school for children who have problems with language - small class sizes and individual help focussing on language. The idea being that he will do the first and second grades here and then transfer back into the regular school system when he is able to speak the language fluently. All the people who have asessed (sp) him say the same thing - he is intelligent enough but needs more exposure and more time. He also needs to improve his concentration. People don't believe us when we say his English is fine - it seems it's unusual for him to be fine in one language and have exposure to the second language for so long and for it to be so behind.

So, is it really worth continuing putting him through this. Can all children become billingual? The specialist school sounds like it would be very good but if he learnt only in English I'm sure he would be fine (although concentration still an issue).

Don't know what to do for the best.

Can you increase his exposure to the (on paper) majority language?

There are tons of things you can do. How about:

Babysitter? Do you invite his friends round for tea? Can you hire a tutor, not to 'tutor' him but to come round and play games, do songs, generally chat and improve his vocabulary? Does he watch TV in the majority language?

I would def try this route before a special school.

He does sports after kindi 3 times a week and plays with friends. TV is something we have not done as his speech therapist advised against it (and we have been strict on the amount of tv for concentration etc). We started the other week though for half an hour and he seems to like it. We've also got some cd books.

All of the people we've seen said he will not cope with regular 1st grade. If we don't send him to the specialist school for 2 years we only really have the choice to hold him back. He will then go into a pre-school class where he won't learn to read or write for another year - it will help improve his concentration but not so his language. We have worries that this won't be anough for him - he wants to learn.

I want to make the best decision for him but I don't know what to do. His younger brother has the same amount of exposure but is doing fine.

Sorry to say this, ilovespinach but have you had him thoroughly tested for SN?

20 minutes of TV should not be a problem for any child. I am surprised at the SALT advising against TV completely.

It sounds as if your son has a more deep-rooted problem than the one being thrown into relief by his being raised bilingual.

I would get him a complete check up to test for SN.

Especially, as you say, if his younger brother is more balanced language-wise with the same exposure.

Something does not sit right with me on this. Bilingualismin itself should not be causeing these problems, but many professionals (medical and teaching) can get sidetracked by bilingualism. More likely he has a problem of some sort that is going unnoticed.

Sorry to be blunt, rushing out. Will think about it and come back later.

I second what Greythorne said. At 3, does he sing songs in the majority language? Say nursery rhymes he must hear at school? He will not have the vocabulary of children who hear it all day, but he should be comfortable with his kindi language and songs and talking about toys and games with his peers.

Language acquisition is a crazy thing, all linked up with maths and logic, and is possibly shining a light on another area of SN.

Have you had him assessed in English? Six year old boys are not well known for their concentrations skills! And he could be balking at the second language for another reason - emotional? Doesn't like the school, or a certain teacher?

Thanks for the inputs...We have thought about SN but he doesn't seem to tick all of the boxes. He has imaginative play, can engage, is very affectionate, good eye contact etc. He can play with his peers and sing but school and kindi are saying he needs more language for school.

I really don't know what's going on. He is also a very stubborn little boy and doesn't like to make mistakes - maybe that's it.

Last year when this issue first came to light, he was asessed (sp) by a psycologist (sp sorry goes out of the wondow when I'm tired) and he said he was on a par with other children his age but we needed to keep an eye on his concentration. Nobody else - kindi, or the speech therapist has mentioned anything about SN.

I was thinking about his brother and I think the difference is he went to kindi a little later and was able to speak English fluently by then. DS1 was a little later so he has had to learn the two together....Hope that makes sense.....

Hmmm. If you're quite sure it really is just trouble speaking Foreign , then I'd be minded to send him to school on schedule. You can always offer extra language tuition for him via a tutor (and playdates!). Is he able to understand quite well but just has trouble speaking?

We've been told his understanding is good....
We think the best option is to send him to the school where they learn everything but have smaller groups so they can focus on speech. Then transfer him back into regular primary after 2 years.

Now we're really listening dh and I are noticing a few incorrect sounds in English :( eg he can't say gown properly (as in dressing gown) and struggled this morning when talking about birds to say feathers.

I really think you need to dig deeper.

Given the right conditions, almost all NT children and many SN Children (possibly with the exception of those with specific language issues) can become bilingual.

You might be looking at the wrong thing here.

Often, parents can understand and communicate with their children and not notice a level of language delay which makes it difficult for others to communicate. It's normal. My sister did not realise her son had 80% hearing loss for a long time. She was able to communicate with him, but at school, the problem became very clear. My sister struggled for a long time (guilt, feelings of inadequacy as a mum) for having not realised he had a problem, but she and the other family members were compensating very well and it masked the problem.

All that to say, your son might well have a problem....so, try to get it checked out before jumping to conclusions :)

Ears, eyes, language processing...get everything checked thoroughly.

Personally, I would def not move schools in the hope that a child who is stuggling in some way will suddenly catch up and then move back into mainstream wiout a very concrete plan of action and support.

Try to increase exposure of the majority language per above. You might need to consider an English-language SALT in concert with the majority language SALT.

if he has language problems and theyre offering specialist structured help, id bite their hand off for it, and then he can rejoin the other school later

thank you for the comments :)

Ears and eyes are fine. He has also had a few of the ready for school tests they do here and fine motor skills and everything else seems to be fine. The only issue which is ever flagged to us is language and concentration.

He will be offered very structured and planned support via the school. He will also be observed at kindergarten by them shortly and has to be fully assesed by them before he is offered a place.

Good luck.

Good luck to your little boy :) I hope the specialist school offers him a place- from what you've said, that's what I would want for my child in that situation.

I have friends in a similar position. Their little boy has been offered a similar thing, although within the same school (in CH), so maybe its more common where you are than to people in the uk? They are probably going with it, although were warned to look at the make-up of the rest of the special class before making their decision.