Raising DS with German and English

[henrysmama2012]

We would like to raise our son speaking German and English (my DH's 1st language is German and I am attempting to learn it!!-not too impressive at the moment, though!)-does anyone have any good advice about how to approach this/books or resources that would help us? Or is it as simple as DH talking to him in German and me speaking to him in English?

Basically, it's quite simple. Think 'one parent one language'. Your DH needs to be quite stubborn and determined to speak only German to your DS, even when he is only a tiny baby. As DS gets older, this can be supplemented by German song CDs, story books, DVDs, holidays etc. In my experience, no need for theory books, just persistence.

I agree with the one parent one language BUT..... you have to be prepared that one language will become dominant and the person who is speaking the minority language has to be stubborn & strict to keep that language going.

Dh struggled with this in the UK as English was our home language & the dc were at school/nursery speaking English and it was up to him (and the GP's when they visited) to keep his language going. We're now in his country & the situation is completely reversed. The kids are totally immersed in his language & i'm fighting to keep them speaking English! But thankfully i'm beyond stubborn about it & they know that I wont answer them if they dont ask in English (even tho I speak the other language well!).

Its an amazing skill for your ds to have as a grows up so stick at it!

Hi,

we are both German and German is the home language. Despite this DD speaks English as her first language and German only if she wants too. She understands everything though.

I think even a passive understanding is better than nothing. We found that DD would start speaking proper sentences in German later than in English.

In order to increase the German input you could opt to take German as the family language (will also help you learning it quicker). Friends (she German, he Irish) did this. And Amazon Germany will be your DH's new best friend. I worked on a project in Germany for 18 months (flying in every 2 weeks) and always raided the book shops there.

You don't say how old your DS is but your DH can start with German nursery rhymes, picture books and later move to story tapes and DVDs and reading reading reading.

One Parent One Language (OPOL) worked well for us. We are in the UK, I am German and only speak German to DC (almost 7 and 3). DP is British and only speaks English (he still can't speak German . DS (7) is fluent in both and switches language depending on who he is talking to. He speaks German to me, DD (3) and to anyone else who he thinks will understand, also he still prefers me to read to him (I only ever read/translated to him in German). DD's German is better than her English, as I spent more time with her than DP, also she just started pre-school, but the English will come and probably dominate in time.

I think its important to be stubborn with OPOL, to pass on a positive cultural identity and to spent enough time with your DC (e.g. I imagine if your DH worked full time in a busy job it may be harder for him to keep the DC's German up).

I would advise that you stick to your native language when speaking to your DC - DS (7) always laughs at DP when he attempts to speak German and tells him that one day he might learn it too

Brilliant, thank you so much everyone...we will definitely go with the one parent, one language approach - LO is due at the end of March, but we wanted to know as early as possible what our approach should be. Thanks everyone

What the others have said - either German as family language or OPOL, but be consistent. I can recommend a book called The Bilingual Family because it explores a whole range of different family scenarios at home - for instance in some families the rule is that the person who starts a conversation determines the language to be used by everyone else. The important thing is sticking to that rule. However, if you are the main carer and only DH speaks the minority language, you'll have to be prepared for your DC speaking German very much as a passive/second language, there will be substantial interference and they will possibly retain an English accent.

Resources:

• Your local Samstagschule
• Radio - there's a Berlin-based kids' radio station called Radio Teddy (age target 3-10) which is also available on the internet, if you have digital radio.
• Ti-Vi website for TV station ZDF, also KiKa website for kids' channel. They have lots of programmes available you can watch together. Good programmes for little ones are Sendung mit der Maus and Biene Maja.
• Do you get the chance to visit DH's family in Germany? The best thing is if they genuinely don't understand English and your DC is forced to use German with them. At least one holiday there a year would be good, preferably without you when they get older.

The only way of getting your DC really genuinely bilingual (spoken and written) would be if you sent him to the German school in Richmond, because he would need an immense amount of input to get the orthography right. But if you're not fussed about that (ie for you it's more about spoken communication) then just doing it yourselves at home is sufficient.

I find YouTube a great resource too - lots of children's programmes, songs, movies. Mine like the old fairy tale films and there are lots of them.

Get DH to start talking German to bump now do when baby actually comes out its natural for him to use German :) there is evidence that baby's recognise voices in the womb and DHs voice changes in pitch and tone when he speaks French so I wanted that voice to be familiar to DS. We only did it or a month but will do it from the start with DC2.