Mothersday

[Machasma]

Am I being unreasonable?.... I got a card and a horrid skirt today not wrapped up and very clearly something I'd never wear. Had argument at 4am about the fact oh had changed his mind about getting up with the baby. I got up. Then went back to bed and oh just yelled constantly for me to get up and help with the baby. He made himself breakfast.... Nothing for me.... And now wants me to help with gardening today. Great!

On fathers day he had a lie in, breakfast in bed, a selection of little presents and then he went out for the day without us.

Feeling miserable that he makes the minimum effort :-(

Don't think you are being UR - how old are you DCs? It means more when they do something (even if it's a bit rubbish)

Take the skirt back and exchange it? Make yourself breakfast and then go somewhere nice with your baby

However if I were you I wouldn't bother with father's day again

My son is only 1 so up to oh....he thinks I'm being ungrateful.... :-( that does sound nice though. Me and my son spending time together...

He should be ashamed of himself!! even the most inept male who struggles with present buying ect has a mouth they can use to ask someone what to do / buy. I agree with MOLN - forget fathers day next year and go off and do your own thing _ leave him in the bloody garden!!!!!

Well - I see that you are upset - but it is not as if he completely forget the day at all and didn't even acknowledge it.

FWIW - I had my 16 month old DD after 8 years and 5 IVFs so for me just being a Mum on Mother's day is enough. I have been given a card and we are going out for tea - but honestly to me I wouldn't be upset if I had been given a card and a present. I know ladies who find this day the hardest of the year knowing they are unlikely ever to be called Mummy. So on the balance of things - Sorry but to me you are being a bit unreasonable........

Maybe a different perspective might help you ket it go a bit and try and enjoy the day for what it is - a celebration of being a mother, not a present fest.

You got a card and a present, albeit a crap one. Yes, he's been pretty rubbish apart from that but i wonder if some of his reaction might be in reaction to a hint of ungratefulness on your part?

But i agree with sarahev - being a mum is enough (DS took three long years due to PCOS) and i'd actually requested my DH to save his money as DS is too little to know what it's all about (although as it happens he ignored me anyway!) Because i work FT i actually like doing things that make me feel like a proper mum whenever i can, making DS his dinner, spending some time with him, playing, changing his bum, wiping his nose, cuddles, or whatever. You say on father's day he went out for the day without you.... is that what being a father/ mother is really about? Spending time away from your family? I don't think that's any benchmark of a good father's/ mother's day tbh. I'd rather be doing the gardening.... together.

Just in a gloom and can't shift it. Also have step son. Who's mother has gone out with her other children and he is here with us. Meaning we can't do anything anyway and find it bizarre she wouldn't actually want to see her son on mothers day and is happy to leave him out of her special day outing!!!

Why can't you do anything anyway? Having your DSS shouldn't mean you don't do something together...

Why can't you do anything because of your DSS?

FFS, go take the boys to the park or something. Wear your new skirt

Because we would usually Go for a nice walk or tea or beach. Ss wants to sit in front of ben10 all day.

And I shall never wear the skirt!! I am contemplating keeping to bring out for laughs every now and again!

Sod what SS wants, do what you want to do.

....we would just have a moody child trailing around and complaining.... Prob is unreasonable but it quite like to do something with my partner and my son. I can't believe his mother is having mothers day with 2/3 children...

I think you need to reflect on how lucky you are to be a mum. In a few years your child will be making crap gorgeous gifts at nursery and school.

If it's any consolation, this year I got a homemade candle together with an awful period and chronic neck and arm pain. I am almost in tears with pain but I am grateful that I have my 2 darlings who I have installed infront of the Wii whilst I try to gnaw my arm off.

I'm very lucky and happy bring a mother this has more to do ( all to do) with partner who is exactly the same for Bday valentines day. Xmas.... It's really a partner rant not a Mothersday rant. When he gets home with son I'm going to take him out and have a nice time just mummy and son! Xx

lol noseynoonoo, poor you! Maybe tmi, but i've now had the shits for 3 days and can't eat anything at the moment. Bang goes my mother's day dinner! Probably literally...

Very funny Matana, made me chuckle!

sarahev, what a load of shite.

Would be interested to know what in particular you are talking about petitema - I was very careful to try and be tactful (unlike yourself) and was just trying to give the OP a little perspective about her angst so that it doesn't put a cloud over her entire day.

However as a grown adult with apparently thicker skin than yours - thank you so much for your articulately put response to my comment. I feel it really added to the thread.

OP - I am still a little confused as to why the presence of SS stops any activities for the day, might not be your ideal but it is your choice whether to stay in and lament about your woe or get up and make the most of the day.....

Sarahhev, It was your very condescending woah is me I had IVF 5 times and sooooo grateful for my baby. We are all grateful for our Dcs and I have been hrough more thanone loss. You added nothing but shite.

You were as tactful as a brick btw.

I certainly was not writing in a woe is me vain (apart from feeling woeful for the women who like you have also suffered losses but have not been lucky enough to have a live child) I am not at all full of woe - I am very happy!

I concede maybe tactful was not the best choice of word - maybe I should have said that I was not insulting to anybody in my reply (unlike your good self) but I was just trying to help the OP to get out of her miserable frame of mind and to look at the positives for the rest of the day.

So I was trying to be helpful to the OP at least - something that I cannot say for you as I don't see anything helpful to the OP from you - merely an attempt to insult me.

I accept and can see clearly you did not appreciate my post - some people will agree with you and others with me - I am not looking for a catfight and do not wish to go any more off topic.

I have noted your disapproval of me petitema - I guess we will never be good friends. Such a shame...........

Oh the shame. Now do fuck off.

The only contribution you've made to this thread is to fling an insult petitema. Perhaps you should take your own advice.

Hope your day improved Machasma.

Sarahev made a good point in her first post and it is one I agree with. I have had some great Mothering Sundays and some not so great ones but I'm always reminded of the couple at my old Church who are now in their 60s and were never able to have a child. I remember how pained they looked on Mothering Sunday and the man always gave his wife a lovely tender kiss. I think Sarahev was just putting it all in perspective.