Parents of a baby and toddler - how on earth do you try and meet both their needs

[Fevrier]

as in - my 7 month baby needs a quiet place to sleep for a good chunk of the day and then needs a quiet place to feed and then a clean floor to crawl around on... Whereas My 3 year old needs to be running around outside and meeting people and generally doing the opposite of the baby.

If I stay in for her naps and go out when she is awake then she gets no exercise. If I go out while she sleeps so my son can run about then she risks being woken up.

I hadn't realised it didn't get easier once the baby was bigger! I feel guilty about one or the other all the time at the moment!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/parenting/1418243-Toddler-and-newborn-How-Support-thread

We're all asking the same in another thread! It's worth reading. I had such a terrible day with DS 1&2 yesterday and thank God I found that thread which reassured me that I'm not going dolally. Or maybe I am, but it's ok because there are lots of other mums who are too. :)

I would not worry too much about quiet place to feed or clean floor too. I just compromise and first nap of the day is when we are out and about in the pram or car. Dd1 is 2.7 and dd2 8 months. I try to be home for big sleep of the day 1pm- 2.30pm ish so she gets one good nap a day. Don't worry you will figure it out. You can always go to a soft play so they both exercise together and then little one can snooze on the way back in pram or car

I think you may need to 'train' DC2 to sleep while out and about and surrounded by noise. My second is only 5 months at the moment but will still sleep quite happily when surrounded by lots of noise. Now, that may change, but my first did sleep in the buggy without problems until he was 2. Now it is another story...

I would also definitely stop worrying about the clean floor!

I don't expect the guilt will go away though!

From day 1 (okay week 3 ish!) with all siblings we were out at toddler groups etc where my friends helped supervise the older child and the baby bf/ slept. I did eventually train them into an afternoon nap when I could no longer squeeze the baby into the phil and teds cocoon .

TBH the way I parented for each subsquent child changed dignificantly as the needs of the eldest child had to be taken into account, that's not to say they had it all their own way cbeebies will not kill them .

Good luck and remember the mn mantra this too will pass. mine are now 6, 4 and 2 and it's beginning to feel like a like a hazy memory.

Thanks everyone. I'll check out gutsy thread. I really thought it would get easier not harder. In some ways I found the start easier - feeding on demand, sleeping in the sling, all fitting round my toddler nicely.

Now solids and naps are making it more complicated.

I was really relaxed about crawling around on dirty floors and playgrounds with my first but he was ill all the time and it was so so hard that I can't face that again,

Think I will just let her nap in the pram with a blanket blocking out sights and White noise covering sounds.... But am worried I will end up with a cot nap refuser.... In fact I already have one! Never mind.

It is bloody tiring isn't it? When does it get easier?