Uncontrollable aggression in 6 year old

[anchovies]

My 6 year old ds is really struggling at the moment. He is the middle child and has always been very physical, loves all sports and generally has a lot of energy. We have always had to be quite firm with him as he tends to get a bit carried away with the moment. More recently he has started constantly hitting/grabbing faces/jumping on etc his younger sister and older brother. Yesterday for example he was getting told off for hitting his sister and whilst telling us he hadnt done anything he (almost absent mindedly) put her in a headlock and stuck a paperclip in her cheek.

Dh and I are at a loss as how to deal with it. No matter what I do I can't get him to care, I have tried allsorts, no playing football, sending to his room etc etc. The only thing that seems to get a reaction is when dh really shouts at him (obviously not ideal!)

We have discussed with him (millions of times!) talking about feelings, good ways to deal with anger etc but it doesn't help at all. We have also tried extreme positivity, making sure he is getting loads of specific attention and praise for good behaviour. As far as I know he doesn't get into trouble at school but I suspect he plays very roughly at playtime.

Just wondering if anyone has successfully dealt with a similar problem?

When you're being engaged in a power struggle you have to exert power to have an impact....not appeal to their finer feelings. When someone is challenging your authority you have to ramp it up. When someone is overstepping the boundaries you have to reinforce the boundaries. Hence why he responds when DH shouts... it's the authority he's respecting.

If he's hurting other children you remove him straight away (physically, if necessary), read him the riot act and isolate him from others until he's got the message and apologises. If you think he's playing roughly at school, talk to his teacher and get that nipped in the bud or the next thing that happens will be he's in trouble for bullying.

Finally... don't make excuses like 'getting carried away' or being 'very physical'. He's six years old, not a toddler, and he should be able to modify his behaviour.