nanny problem? would you tell the parent?

[housearrest]

Hello all, this may not be the ideal place to post this message but something's been on my mind for a while now and I'd like some unbiased advice and opinions.
My son has a little friend (they're both 3) and his friend is looked after 5 days a week by his nanny. We see the nanny and the little boy about once a week.
The problem is that its become increasingly obvious that the nanny actually doesn't like the child very much and spends most of the time (at least when we're there) relating stories of how awful he is. Granted he can be naughty like my own child, but he's certainly-to my best reckoning-no different to any other.

From what I hear the parents are loving but the mother seems to be happy once most of the actual work is done by the nanny-thoug I appreciate that I only hear one side as I don't actually know the parents.
After the christmas they both seemed happier together (child & nanny) and she even commented that he "has been alot better"-this lasted about 2 weeks and we were back to stories of how awful he is. Which made me think that perhaps he was happy having spent the last few weeks with his parents and family and now he was back to his routine with the nanny things were stressful again.
The one thing that really upsets me is that he really doesn't seem to get any room to express himself-he's constantly told to "stop this" "stop that" and sent out of the room for minor indiscretions.

I'm sure that any nannies reading this will tell me to butt out but what would you do? Would you try to tell the parents your concerns?
I ask this as I know that the majority of the other people they see throughout their week are other nannies and their charges and I just wonder if perhaps I'm reading too much into this situation or not?

Be grateful for any reponses.

I would be horrified if I had a nanny who said things about my child to other people.

i think its yuour duty to talk to the parents

I would also talk to the parents. Poor child who has to be in the care of someone who doesn't seem to appreciate him.

Please do tell the parents, as tactfully as you can. If my nanny didn't like my ds I'd be horrified. Poor little boy.

Thanks very much for your-amazingly swift-responses.
You're right, it is my duty to tell his parents and its no more than I already knew. In fact, I've been getting angry with myself for not doing something sooner.

Why am I so nervous?!

Thanks xx

As a nanny reading this i too would say speak to the parents. It is possible for a nanny to dislike a child but then they shouldn't be looking after them.

Im also a nanny and i also think you should have a word with the parents.

Sounds very unproffesional to be talking about the child like that! (she also sounds way too strict sening him out the room so much )

TBH she doesnt sound like a very nice nanny to me, and you must tell the childs parents your concerns, so they can monitor it / deal with it from there!

Im sure if i was a parent who had a nanny (personaly i wouldnt have nanny but thats just me, but IF i did) id want to know!

As a mum who has had three nannies I suspect that a bit of gossip about the parents and kids goes on when they get together but I suspect most are professional enough to keep it out of the earshot of the kids and most is along the lines of "XXXX is doing this, how do I deal with it".

I also can appreciate how difficult it is to approach the parents. But also they probably have an inkling that something is not right - when my 3 year old started to tell us to shut up, I suspected that he must be hearing this from someone - and it wasn't us

Good luck.

Thanks again everyone. I'm very glad that nannies also replied to me-I wondered if I was perhaps being too soft or whatever and perhaps reading too much into this.
I will work out a way of approaching the parents.

Thanks xx