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Mothers of 3+ yr old girls please answer this BEFORE i KILL MYSELF...

9 replies

quickchat · 16/02/2012 10:08

Is two years a hard stage for girls in particular? Do they get easier? I say girls because mums of girls and boys say their girls are much more demanding. It is stereotyping I know but I can't help noticing it to be true with my two.

I have a 4.5 yr old DS. He had his hard phase at 3.5 until before xmas and he is generally, and always has been, pretty easy going. Like all boys there are times when I could do with a tranquelliser dart gun but he takes a telling most days. He likes to please. He is nice most of the time.

DD - OH MY GOD. I could literally tear my hair out and run for the hills.
Moan moan moan, whine whine moan, damand demand demand. NO PATIENCE WHATSOEVER.

EXAMPLE

(whilst whining and crying) "want fairy dress on" "want fairy dress on" "want fairy dress on" I go and get fariy dress and whilst im putting it on more crying ensues "want wings on" "want wings on"
Yes Im putting the dress on wait a minute - She starts tantruming.....

Right now she is screaming "want to draw picture", "want to draw picture". Im ignoring her because she has been SO BLOODY AWFUL this morning i might start swearing and screaming SHUT THE FECK UP.

Also the pens and paper sit on the table every day and she is fully aware of this - arrrrghhhhhh.

Now, it's always hard to remember totally how your last DC was at certain stages with certain things..

(although I clearly remember DS was no where near as demanding, impatient and I remember enjoying him loads) but, is she still (2.2) at that stage where they don't understand waiting. I remember reading something when DS was a baby about how even though they can see you getting the cup for their drink, pouring the drink etc, they don't understand the drink is coming to them, it actually upsets them more that they can see it but don't have it yet. Is that still the case at 2?

She just goes on and on and on and grinds me down. She doesn't give one iota about the word NO, never takes a telling, never gives in over anything, never SHUTSUP. I can't stand anymore.

Will she improve with age or is this the difference between girls and boys. Am I doomed forever?

Im hoping that as she gets older and doesn't need that nap she refuses to take and understands ""yes darling I will get you that drink once im out the toilet" without tantrum number 70 that day, that life will get easier.

I should mention Im unexpectedley 3 months PG with number 3 so im pretty scared right now!

OP posts:
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TunipTheVegemal · 16/02/2012 10:13

she'll improve with age.

Neither of my older two (dd and ds1) went through a really awful phase as toddlers but ds2 switched from adorable easygoing baby to terrible two practically the night of his birthday. I feel your pain.

Currently he is into having tantrums because he wants to watch a dvd that we don't own and have never owned. 'Want to watch Gruffalo dvd!'
'We haven't got a Gruffalo dvd!'
'No, want to watch it.'

The other day he had a big strop because I was going to wipe his face after lunch and he objected to the flannel I was using - 'That's not a cloth!'
He turned down all the possible cloths until we settled on using kitchen roll instead.
And so it goes on. Day after day after day. Thank God he is at preschool this morning.

TunipTheVegemal · 16/02/2012 10:14

oh and congratulations on your pregnancy!

margoandjerry · 16/02/2012 10:16

No this is not girls and boys. My boy was (is) like this. My girl was easy as pie. It's just who they are but hopefully it's not who they are forever and this phase will pass.

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chibi · 16/02/2012 10:17

she is normal

it is not a girl thing

early pg is a killer, please be kind to her - 3 is v young, and some 3 y o are younger than others - dd was potty trained, dry at night, could tie shoe laces etc etc; ds is a verrrrry different character

as i say, be kind and patient, and do what you need to to be able to do that - e.g. make sure you get a break

MrsJohnDeere · 16/02/2012 10:24

Not a girl thing but a second child thing. Ds2 is just like this.

quickchat · 16/02/2012 10:33

oh well, at least I don't need to fear having another girl!

It's just when I talk to friends/other mums they tend to say "ah typical girl, demanding, determined".

She does have her good side. She is much more affectionate than DS, very very cuddly and loving. Just Haaaaard work. Im praying it's not her personality entirely but her age/sex whatever.

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Kveta · 16/02/2012 10:37

my 2.5 yo DS is EXACTLY like this. When he isn't bouncing off the walls at 5am demanding we put our socks on and go get some chockit for him (like that's ever going to happen...). Very tiresome, and we have days where he nearly gets drop kicked across the threshold at nursery. This morning was one of them...

hard work!

FourThousandHoles · 16/02/2012 10:41

I have a 2.4yo like this

My older one was a lot more placid

If we're going for sweeping generalisations, I would go with the second child thing rather than the girl thing - both mine are girls

It will pass, and you will find it easier to deal with as you get your head round your pregnancy (congrats :) ) and get through the revolting feeling of early pregnancy

Just hang on in there, it'll work out.

allyfe · 16/02/2012 11:09

My DS is like this (although not quite up there yet...I think I have more to look forward to...he's only 17 months).

I was worried it was a boy thing initially.

I think I'm relieved it is a 2nd child thing.

Although like you OP, I'm hoping it isn't a personality trait...just a stage (don't mind if it is a longish stage...I'm looking ahead to 3...)

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