Tell me I'm normal and tell me it will not always feel like this...

[TearingMyHairOut]

I am literally TEARING MY HAIR OUT. I have ds1 who is 5 1/2 and ds2 who is nearly 3. They can both be a bit naughty, a bit fighty and have more energy than they know what to do with but nothing out of the ordinary. I am a fit and healthy 29 yr old who is on her knees with the exhaustion of the whole parenting thing. I work part time as a secondary teacher and am generally busy but I genuinely feel overwhelmed by tiredness and could lie down on the floor at any given moment and sleep. I feel fear at the thought that I cannot escape these two wonders I have brought into the world and that this is just life from here on in. I feel intensely guilty for getting tired/ irritated/ impatient/ because I know I am lucky to have them but it's JUST TOO MUCH. Is this a normal parent thing or am I doing a particularly crap job and when does it all start to get easier????

Sounds perfectly normal to me.

I go through phases of felling like this. Wondering "is this it?".

We all have good days and bad days. I've got friends who feel the same.

Not been any help at all, have I - sorry.

I have three dds , 4, 2.5 and 4 months and I feel the same :-(

Will be watching this thread with interest

Are you me?

No, not just you.

I have 2 1/2 year old twins and teach full time, my DH has the boys most of the week but gets 1 1/2 days off when my mum has them.

I spend the hols and weekends as the 'default', feeling knackered, guilty and wishing I had some time to myself and that I was a better mum.

I think it is just really hard.

Hang in there

I hope its normal. Im on my own with 6 yo dd1 and 1yo dd2 and I work part time (consulting engineer). For me its not so much 'is this it?' as 'can I actually do this?'. I too feel intensely guilty for being too short tempered and shouting too much, especially to dd1 who definitely gets the shitty end of the stick, because shes older and 'should know better than that'. Im just soooooooooooooo tired all the time.

I dunno.....Ive been thinking about things like paying a cleaner for a few hours a week. Its not something I can really afford but Im beginning to think for my sanity and dds happiness it might be worth trying to budget for.

Remember as well, its February- I thinkits normally to feel tired in February. It should get better soon

Do you feel depressed at all? that can make you tired and apathetic

If you are getting enough sleep and a always so tired you could fall asleep on the floor, it's worth seeing a doctor in case a medical problem is adding to your troubles though. I felt this way for a very long time before discovering I have Tyroid problem.

It really is very very hard and anyone who tells you otherwise is lying or generally unhinged

I have 2 under 5 as well as a big, shaggy teenager and I would have to say that at the moment I have more bad days than good days!

I understand too completely when you talk about feeling guilty about having these negative feelings too.

It ain't like it is in the movies is it?!

Not sure if I can offer any helpful advice as I feel very much like you do! One thing is, if you can, make time for yourself to escape and I don't just mean a couple of hours. Plan a proper day out with a friend - shopping, going to a gallery/cinema/restaurant. When I do this I do it well in advance so that I've got something to hang onto when times are bleak!!

Take courage, we'll all get through it.

Wow, OP has now terrified me. Have 8 week old DS2 and 23 month DS1 and am telling myself it will get easier in time!

I cannot believe how difficult it is, how tired I feel, how guilty I am over everything. I agree with the Feb thing, the nights are getting lighter now and you can actually get out for longer in the afternoon for walks and stuff - fresh air always makes me feel better. But then again so did a social life, sleep and time to even go to the loo!!

I agree some time to yourself - can you fit in any exercise for instance - that makes a huge difference to how I feel - and you don't mention their dad - how does he fit in -

I agree with moonblushtomato - having something in the day, or even in the week to look forward to is a lifesaver. Even if it is just ten minutes walk, a coffee with a friend, or whatever, it just needs to be planned and in the diary, so the slog doesn't look so neverending. But everyone gets overwhelmed sometimes. I hope?!

Well there's a bit of reassurance there! I think it's the groundhog day of the whole thing and I feel like I should love it all more than I do, when most of the time I just feel like I'm crawling towards the end of the day. I have seen the doctor and told her and said 'there's billions of other people out there all doing what I'm doing and doing a better job' - she gave be some iron tablets so that was nice!

I have a 5 year old, who has Aspergers, and a 3 year old and I am far more exhausted now than when they were younger. Others with similar aged dc have said they are permanently exhausted. When they are babies and toddlers, you think it will be easier in a year or two, but I think it is the cumulative effect of several years of broken sleep and little time to yourself to really relax. I have a great dh but we are both exhausted by our dc. I do have a couple of things planned for myself in the next couple of months, which will help to keep me sane.