Slow Parenting

[LikeAnAdventCandleButNotQuite]

Just come across this I know, I know, Wikipedia

I wondered if I were just old-fashioned in my views, but it turns out there's a 'Movement' isn't there always for the type of parenting style I grew up in and aspire to raise my DD in.

The bit about Toys resonated with me...I think there's no better toys than a bunch of Lego bricks or a tonn of pencils and paper for LOs to create something.

I hated beyond comprehension 'classes' and 'clubs' as a child, and much preferred to spend the time playing with friends or reading. Consequently, I never ended up doing dance classes, swimming clubs, karate etc. I do sometimes feel sorry for kids who have an endless ream of activities after school which consequently reduces the amount of time they have to just 'be'. Of course, most who do these classes, I imagine, thoroughly enjoy them, but I do wonder about the ones who don't and are co-erced into going.

I suppose it may be, overall, the opposite to helicopter parenting, and both styles have their positives and negatives.

Whilst I know this is neither a new or revolutionary movement or post I was just rather pleased to find that I am not alone in my lazy parenting ways.

I find it annoying that there is no aspect of human behaviour that isn't grabbed, boxed and labelled. Everything's a 'syndrome' or a 'movement' or a 'school of thought'. Implication that you have to adopt one of them to be a proper parent and that there are dire consequences for non-compliance. Aaargh!!! (rant over)

We're a one parent, one child household - think that's relevant. I've enrolled him in one or two clubs but, because I am not a taxi service and because I have a life of my own, those are limited. Luckily DS has always been very self-contained and non-clingy....nothing to do with anything I've done, I'm sure.... and he can amuse himself for hours. Which suits me because I find children's games very dull. :) OTOH, because I don't have an on-hand babysitter, he gets dragged along to various grown-up events I enjoy and has to endure those quietly. Think it's good that he knows the world doesn't revolve around him.

I will call my syndrome/movement/school of thought....'benign neglect'.

Yet another label to use to separate those parents who are "doing it right". Yes there are some good points but I don't think many people fall completely into one or other camp. As for the point about classes, how else are children going to work out whether or not they enjoy something unless they are given the opportunity to do it. Again it doesn't have to be all or nothing.

It is just finding another neat little box to put parents in.

My dd does about 16 hours of activities. She reads and loves nothing better than raiding the recycling to make shit things. She likes to cook. She loves wii and tv and nicks my iPad.
Possibly I am the 'just leave them the fuck alone and stop choosing what sort of parenting is best' school of parenting

Oh good, another parenting label

Don't agree with the TV thing - yes it's a passive activity, but fuels the imagination and DS learns a lot from it.

I too am of the 'leave them the fuck alone' school of parenting. It's why I have so much time to MN

Cogito that's how I feel with DD, "benign neglect"...darent mention it around my DM though, as she will be on the phone to Ester Rantzen..."what?! You dont bath her every night???"

Erm no...she doesn;t stink, and Corrie's on tonight.

Isn't "creative boredom" is another term for leaving them to entertain themselves?

Oh God so this now has a label too?

Right well I want my label.

My two both go to classes and spend a fair amount of time arsing around. What's my label?

| also occasionally speak to them.

Your label is 'normal'.... . But there's no money in telling millions of people they are not special. And books titled 'You're Normal, Stop Worrying', 'Leave Your Kids Be For Chrissake' and 'A Bit of Telly & Pop-Tart Won't Kill Them' won't sell so it'll never catch on.

I hate parenting labels didnt have em in my day , now you are an attachment parent and slow parent a pushy parent a helicopter parent, blah de blah , Im so glad i had my babies when i did i would struggled to fit into a box also these parents seem to group themselves in little gangs and huddles really bugs me , just do your own thing stop buying into fads and books and the right sling , Just be a parent

Well said, mrsjay. Love the label of "leave them the fuck alone" too.