3 year old dd won't eat at the tabel. AGGGR!

[toptramp]

DD used to live in a house without a dining space so we had to eat TV dinners in teh lounge. Hated it but she was only little so no harm done.
We have now moved into a bigger place (when she was just 3) with a dining area but dd just won't sit still at the table.
We normally have the tv on whilst I ma preparing dinner and any attempts to tur the Tv off and make her sit at the table are met with a massive tantrum followed by me caving in and letting her eat onb the sofa in front of tv.
I have tried bribing her by offering to buy her a present if she eats her meals at the table for a while but today she sat down, stared at her pasta and soup (which she normally loves) and said no presents. Nothing and left her dinner to watch tv.
I'm just going to have to turn tv off before dinner and put up with screaming for a week or so aren't I? I normally cave in because I don't want to turn food into a battle ground and would rather she ate somewhere than not at all but I desperately want a dinner free living room and a family round the table scenario. I am a single mum so I have tv on when I prepare dinner as a diversion.

Yes turn the TV off. I know she said no present. But could you do a reward chart where she gets a sticker for each time she eats at the table and when she's got say 4 stickers get her a small thing. If she gets down and won't eat just ignore her and take the food away. But don't put the television on until you have finished eating.

stay strong and don't cave in, atm she's getting mixed signals you're saying no but if she shouts loud enough she can get her own way.

Divert with use of different plates at the table, something fun on the table, orange juice instead of water etc (depending on what is normal in your house). Once you have it cracked don't falter and return to the couch as there's every chance you'll be back to square one.

She's 3 and you need to be establishing house rules. Personally I believe the earlier you start the more normal this becomes and saves so much grief later. I am fairly strict with my dd's at a young age establishing boundaries which I can relax as they grow and learn.... I think to try and do it the other way round would be a nightmare. However I accept that others take a much more softly softly approach.

I would also say that if she tantrums over the tv at teatime the tv stays off for the rest of the evening.... but as I said I'm quite strict.

Think you need to be more strict. tv off once meal ready and no meal if not sitting at the table. if you cave in you will never change the behaviour.

Jesus F.C!! no bribes, no reward charts, no sodding fun plates - what is wrong with parents these days???

She has dinner at the table or she goes to bed hungry.

I'm with Clarrykitten. Turn it off well before sit down time, through the tantrum and expect her to eat at the table or be hungry. You will need nervs of steele about ooh twice and she will come around to it. Cave if and you have a rod for your own back and a child who rules the roost. Good luck

I'd stop having the TV on while you cook - maybe have watching a TV programme as a reward for eating nicely at the table? No sitting at the table = no food and no TV.

It's only a battle if you engage. Just explain what the rules are, and she either eats or not.

Is there anything she likes to do at the table while you eat dinner? Put play doh on the table and get her to make a parallel dinner of play doh peas, potatoes, sausages? Or else involve her in what you are doing, get her to stir, pour, roll, find a baking tray, tip beans out of the can, sprinkle grated cheese etc. Anything other than TV to occupy her. Then both sit down at the table together and eat.

Lots of 3 year olds aren't all that interested in sitting down and eating. Has she had a big lunch and a tea time snack at nursery?

I wouldn't link TV and eating at all, or use TV as a reward for eating and sitting at the table.

Yep the TV needs to go off long before dinnertime (at least while she gets used to the new regime). Can she help you to cook - otherwise sit her up at the table with colouring pens/puzzle/playdoh while you cook tea.

Does she have breakfast and lunch at the table? If not then this could be a starting point to get her used to the fact that meals are eaten at the table, do those two meals for a week or two then dinner too.

I can understand your not wanting to make meal time a chore (or a fight!). However the quicker it's done the less painless it will be. Clarry, as usual (!), hit the nail on the head - she'll have to suck it up. She is only having a tantrum because she knows you are going to cave. It'll only take going to bed hungry for a night (or possibly 2) and SHE will cave. You HAVE to step up, your house - your rules. You are not asking anything unreasonable - I am sure if she goes to nursery she eats at the table. Don't put the TV on in the first place and get her to help you prepare dinner and then tell her if she eats nicely you will put the TV on afterwards. Simples! Good Luck